Page 775 - Hello My Honey

9th Jul 2016, 6:00 AM
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Hello My Honey
Average Rating: 5 (2 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 9th Jul 2016, 6:00 AM edit delete
Newbiespud
Confound these players, drink, etc.

I hate buzzing insects. Practically phobic of them. A plan like this even in a fantasy setting would put me on edge.

I'm sure I've asked something similar before, but any stories about this kind of moment of confirmation? Where the DM just has to ask, "Okay, have I understood what you just said, and are you sure that's what you want to do?" It's basically the DM version of a double-take.

69 Comments:

ANW 9th Jul 2016, 6:17 AM edit delete reply
I'm with you NewbieSpud.
Scared of them too.
Masterweaver 9th Jul 2016, 6:19 AM edit delete reply
Masterweaver
*Singsong* Cupcaaaaaaakes!
j-eagle12212012 9th Jul 2016, 10:26 AM edit delete reply
j-eagle12212012
Now that its finished I can rightly claim
Best Nat20 moment in Fallout is Dragons
Someone 9th Jul 2016, 6:20 AM edit delete reply
"Are you sure you want to keep the soul-eating monster that's currently nomming on you as a pet? I did state previously that you can't train it to not try to eat your sould on every opportunity."
"Okay, so what you're saying is that you approach this group of big, scary looking, armed bikers, unarmed, with nothing on you except your authority as a policewoman, that I have explictly stated they don't give a damn about, and you punch their leader?"
"So you're going to arrest the her? Old widow Sanderson, that nice old lady whose only vice is just being bit too gossipy, and who has a great deal of respect in the town? Did I get that right?"
All happened within one session. Answer to each and every one was: "Pretty much, yes."
Digo Dragon 9th Jul 2016, 6:23 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
I can't help but think of Cartman with that second one. "You will respect my authority!" :D
Chakat Firepaw 9th Jul 2016, 5:08 PM edit delete reply
It more brings to mind a bit from Sgt. Renfrew:

"I strode into the room and said 'you are all under arrest!'

"When I regained consciousness...."
Khyrin 10th Jul 2016, 3:46 AM edit delete reply
"Punch in Snout to Establish Authority" is a time honored tradition!
Pablo360 10th Jul 2016, 5:34 AM edit delete reply
Pablo360
The thugs are enamored of your rowdy, no-nonsense brand of policework. Your authority has been clearly established!
albedoequals1 9th Jul 2016, 10:05 AM edit delete reply
albedoequals1
I've had a few of those. The best one was when a sea pony sorceress played the part of a siren on the party, using her mind-control powers to dominate the wizard and force him to protect her while she abused the rest of the party, putting them to sleep, making them kiss each other, luring them into the water, and lots of other malicious "fun".

They escaped her clutches without anyone actually being hurt, including her, and the PCs started a conversation about her being one of the most entertaining boss fights so far. The got to speculating about her motivation and decided that she just wanted attention because she was lonely. On the way back, the bard and the cleric walked right up to her and invited her to join the party, despite the wizard's protests.

They eventually not only recruited her, but reformed her as well, so I have had to rp her off and on ever since.
Guest 9th Jul 2016, 6:18 PM edit delete reply
(2)GM: "Give me a roll."
Player: "Nat 20."
GM: "He falls on his ass. The other bikers look at you with blood in their eyes, but he starts laughing. 'Looks like you're not all talk, girlie. What was it you wanted to know?'"
Someone 10th Jul 2016, 12:00 PM edit delete reply
To be fair, they were going to just tell her what she wanted. But then she started being a general dick towards them.
Digo Dragon 9th Jul 2016, 6:20 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Well now forever hence I'm going to mentally think Angel Bunny sounds like Spud. Weird. O.o

Moments of Confirmation? I got one--

Dragon: "Surrender!"
Digo: "What, you wish to surrender to us? We gladly accept."
GM: "Uh, do you actually say that?"
Digo: "Yup, I say exactly that."
GM: "So, you're insulting the blue dragon's demand?"
Digo: "Yes, to his face."
GM: "Ooookay. Well the dragon doesn't take it well and dives to pin you to the ground."
Digo: "I let him."
GM: "Uh... what?"
Digo: "Not going to try and dodge his pin attempt. Pin away. How much damage do I take?"
GM: "You take 8 damage. So now what do you do?"
Digo: "First, I Sovereign Glue myself to him. Then as a bonus action, I set myself on fire with the Balor Nimbus spell."
GM: "Oh. Well then he's going to let go- oh wait, the glue."
Digo: "I continue to hug him and sing Johnny Cash songs."
Masterweaver 9th Jul 2016, 6:27 AM edit delete reply
Masterweaver
Continue, please...
Digo Dragon 9th Jul 2016, 8:15 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Well, the dragon started clawing at me in an attempt to kill me before the fire killed him. As a cleric, I just kept burning through healing spells (haha, punny) to keep on him like a hot-glued elf on a dragon. ...which was exactly what it was. ^^;

Eventually the dragon was getting extra crispy, so he yanks me off him like an elven Brazilian wax job, peeling off scales in the process. At this point the other PCs routed his kobold minions and were attacking the dragon directly. The dragon flew off quickly in retreat.

My character just laid there a while with a stupid gin on his face. The GM had that "Well played" look, but I certainly made an enemy that day. :D
ANW 9th Jul 2016, 6:29 AM edit delete reply
Here's a character idea.
A student of the shinigami.
(You Bleach character and your power get out of here)
To those that do not know, he is the Grim reaper.
He is neither light or darkness.
He just help souls to the two realms.
As a student, he reflects that.
This character wields the classic scythe for dark, and a tanto for light.
He will be a lawful neutral alignment.
Those have to be included.
The rest is up to you.
Winged Cat 9th Jul 2016, 9:42 AM edit delete reply
Too easy. Try designing a character around a pipe tomahawk (with peace pipe inhalant of choice) and a poisoned ida.
KeeCoyote 9th Jul 2016, 7:12 AM edit delete reply
When I was young I would do hunt and release on bumblebees with a zip lock bag.

They never stung me.
Guest 9th Jul 2016, 9:43 AM edit delete reply
I should hope not. Bumblebees don't have stingers, so if one of them had stung you it would have reflected very poorly on your entomological abilities.
terrycloth 9th Jul 2016, 4:29 PM edit delete reply
Where did you hear that? Because it's wrong. It sounded suspicious so I looked it up, and there are a bazillion pictures of bumblebee stingers and articles about bumblebee stings and everything.
Chakat Firepaw 9th Jul 2016, 5:14 PM edit delete reply
Um, I hope you don't spend time trying to catch bunblebees. They do indeed have stingers, what they lack are the barbs that the stingers of honeybees have.

The good news is that you don't end up having to get a stinger out. The bad news is that they can sting you again, and again, and again....
Guest 9th Jul 2016, 5:21 PM edit delete reply
Erm... What? To quote a Wikipedia: "Queen and worker bumblebees can sting. Unlike in honeybees, a bumblebee's stinger lacks barbs, so the bee can sting repeatedly without injuring itself; by the same token, the stinger is not left in the wound". Are you a bumblebee in disuise feeding us with false information?
Digo Dragon 10th Jul 2016, 9:00 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Relevant Video Clip.
aylatrigger 9th Jul 2016, 8:56 AM edit delete reply
aylatrigger
I have arachnophobia, myself...
I am not scared of bees, but wary of them and scared my cats will play with them and get stung... I have been stung twice while in my house, once asleep in my bed and once by stepping on a dead bee.
But I really should be scared of ticks. Spiders have never hurt me, but ticks have given me 4 deadly diseases, 3 of them lymes.

On the topic of moment of confirmation... I feel this happens often, but I can't think of any good personal ones. Therefor, here are some from the Gamers: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4ZeTAfYoY4
Digo Dragon 9th Jul 2016, 12:53 PM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Ouch, that's a lot of diseases. D:
Aprion 9th Jul 2016, 9:19 AM edit delete reply
Not something I witnessed personally but a story I heard once about a over eager mage in a D&D party.

DM: you come upon a locked iron gate. there is a padlock around the bars that...
Mage: I cast Otilukes Telekinetic Sphere on the padlock.
DM: Oookay... thats 5000 pounds of telekinetic force. Directed inwards or outwards?
Mage: Inwards.
DM: You crush the lock into a solid metal wad around the bars it was holding together. It's never gonna open now.
Mage: No wait, outwards!
DM: Okay everyone, roll a reflex save against flying shrapnel.

Half the party ended up critically wounded.

Guest 9th Jul 2016, 9:20 AM edit delete reply
WHAT'S THIS?! A RACE OF FAIRIES IN NEED OF ASSISTANCE IN TRANSPORTING THEIR POLLEN?
Doctor Dinosaur 10th Jul 2016, 2:06 AM edit delete reply
BEHOLD, AN ORDINARY BEEHIVE!
Venseyness 9th Jul 2016, 9:23 AM edit delete reply
"Okay, are you absolutely CERTAIN that you want to attempt to break into this manor and kill the noble within?" "Yeah! Then we'll get the town!" "You do realize that this town is part of a much larger empire, right?" "Okay, so we'll get the town for a little while." "..."
Winged Cat 9th Jul 2016, 9:27 AM edit delete reply
I have been accused of making characters that were walking strings of confirmation moments. Perhaps my most extreme was a certain battleaxe-wielding, springy-jump princess.

"Are you sure you want to interrupt the boss's monologue with an axe to the face? How do you even get - oh, right, you can just jump there in one action."

"So let me get this straight. You're just jumping right over the parade being held in your honor?" "Yes. It seems suspicious since we weren't told about it until now, and it's blocking our way."

"The airship is taking off. If you don't board now-" "NOBODY! LEFT! BEHIND! Besides, in the couple of actions it'll take to finish digging my friend out it won't be far enough away that I can't just jump there carrying someone."

"You know the rest of the party can't just jump atop buildings, right?" "I lead, they follow. Also, I get our enemies looking up at the shiny armored target they can't hurt even if they do manage to hit, and not down until the rest of the party is well inside the artillery's minimum range."
TheStratovarian 9th Jul 2016, 10:28 AM edit delete reply
TheStratovarian
Not for me, but for a ponyfinder session a few weeks ago.

we had this kind of moment for our monk.

After explaining the desire with the large statue.

The rest of the party goes to leave the room, save two foolish folks with the monk.

The gm goes "Are you sure you wish to do this?"

The monk's player nods and goes to say "yes"

the gm then goes "Okay, you suplex the statue, the statue activates. Roll for initiative."
Grrys 9th Jul 2016, 10:30 AM edit delete reply
Sure, tie up the thing that will do its best to KILL EVERYTHING as soon as you release and take it with you. Nothing bad could possibly come of this.

And this was the same campaign where one character started collecting female NPCs because he's a chauvinistic pig like that. He had the intent to bring them with him throughout the campaign, always adding more whenever he could.
lakiel 9th Jul 2016, 11:10 AM edit delete reply
DM: so you want to break down the door to the particle accelerator?
kazrik beardchisler: yes
me: even though I think its currently active?
K B: there's a 50/50 chance its not and we need to check inside.

also
gm: the power armor is now damaged and falls out of the air
K B: I jump of the tower and grab hold of the armor
me : I can catch it telekinetically for you
K B: I still jump of I dont want to let my new armor out of my sight
me: wait I cant hold both of you
K B: its okay maximum fall damage is only 20d6 I'll survive
me: were in the middle of a war-zone and you want to go of alone and injured
k b: meh I'll be okay.
steevee 9th Jul 2016, 12:51 PM edit delete reply
crazy alchemist half elf and dwarven warrior blacksmith convinced the rest of the party we didn't need to raid the wizard tower to save the tiny mining town.

"we got scrap metal, we gots explosives, lets go Mythbusters and make a rocket!"

and then the entire area was a giant crater.
Tatsurou 9th Jul 2016, 12:52 PM edit delete reply
Tatsurou
After today's comic, I can now only picture the DM as Angel...and it is oddly appropriately hilarious!
Digo Dragon 10th Jul 2016, 9:01 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
I know, it's too perfect!
Mykin 10th Jul 2016, 6:09 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
Dang you people! Not only can't I disconnect Spud's voice with that of the DM, now I'm going to be stuck with the mental image of Angel behind a DM screen and narrating the adventure in Spud's voice! It really is too perfect for me to unsee now!
Philadelphus 9th Jul 2016, 1:04 PM edit delete reply
Philadelphus
I used to keep honey bees for a few years, and enjoyed working with them so much and got so comfortable around them that I eventually shed all protective gear except for a pair of gloves to prevent stings if I accidentally squeezed a bees while working in their hives (not that I ever needed them, even without the protective gear I never got stung). I loved the smell of warm honey, pollen, propolis, and wax, and it was adorable seeing the little baby bee larvae in their individual cells. I could spend long minutes just watching bees crawling around on my hand, admiring their tiny, intricate bodies. I tried to get my family to join me in working with the bees, but I could never get them to see the inherent majesty of the wee creatures the way I did. I guess it's really true what they say, beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder.
Nixitur 9th Jul 2016, 7:57 PM edit delete reply
Nixitur
no
Pablo360 10th Jul 2016, 5:42 AM edit delete reply
Pablo360
Cyanide & Happiness already made that pun years ago.
Digo Dragon 10th Jul 2016, 9:02 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
I love everything about this post. :3
Xaran Alamas 11th Jul 2016, 3:43 AM edit delete reply
Well played, well played *clap*
Laurence 9th Jul 2016, 2:05 PM edit delete reply
Bees give me the heebie jeebies. I'm not allergic to them, but I have a weak immune system to begin with; every time I have been stung, it has led to something else getting the chance to wreak havoc on me. So while I know in my head that scenes like the one in panel 3 are fake and meant to be humorous, I still get a little shiver of fear when I see them. And don't get me started on those youtube clips where people cover themselves in bees! No thank you!!
Mykin 9th Jul 2016, 5:08 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
Moment of confirmation? Well I tend to be smart enough to back off or at least question my actions whenever my GM asks if I'm sure about doing anything. I do have one story where I decided to throw that out the window. Though I doubt I can come even remotely close to super-gluing myself to a dragon before doing self-immolation while singing Johnny Cash songs to it.

In our attempt to tie up some loose ends before the end, our FO:E group snuck past the heavily guarded wall into West Trottingham. Our target was a university that my character, Astral, was convinced held the answers to free the ponies inside the matrix-like Stable P-5 and we were asked by the mayor of East Trottingham to figure out why the West had basically cut off all communications with them. Things got a lot more complicated when we emerged from the metro to see a lot of blackened bodies around and the entire city engulfed in a black mist that only our magically inclined party members could see.

After some digging around, we discovered the existence of a project "Blackstar" through a thesis that Astral had apparently written from before the war. Apparently, the government of Province figured that the war was only going to end in mutual destruction and decided to find someway of counteracting the radiation that would cover the landscape once the bombs fell. So, in possibly the most brilliant move ever (/Sarcasm), they decided to collect a material called "Irridium" from some meteorites and then fuse them with the souls of ponies so they could then absorb the radiation. Yeah, our GM was reading Project Horizons when he was coming up with this stuff. Go figure.

Anyway, after dealing with Astral's angst over this and other things that he found out about himself (like the mare he liked turning out to have been his fiance before both of their minds were wiped), we found some more clues which lead us to a secret underground facility where there was a giant purple orb of Irridium. Having already confirmed that the black mists is what killed everypony, that these things were somehow connected to the black mists, and that there were pony souls trapped inside of them... well, naturally Astral decides to open it up and touch the ominously glowing orb.

I think I was asked a grand total of three times by our GM if this was what I really wanted to have my character do.

In a rare moment, I was actually dead set on doing my admittedly unwise decision. Thankfully, our rather insane doctor, Bellfruit, decided that my character's decision was stupid and attempted to stop him before it was too late. Unfortunately, Bellfruit crit failed his roll and managed to touch Astral just as Astral touched the orb. Outside of hearing some things that no sane pony should really hear in their heads, nothing really happened and Astral got an earful about how we really shouldn't be touching things that could potentially steal our souls. Not that that stopped us from trying something with it that could potentially cause it to explode and repeat the whole disaster all over again, but I digress.

Considering that our doctor is going to be the GM of our next FO:E game, I'm looking forward to playing my tiny pegasus mare who will have less restraint than Astral currently does and has an (unhealthy?) obsession with explosives. Maybe next time I'll have a better story to tell with her.
Pablo360 10th Jul 2016, 5:45 AM edit delete reply
Pablo360
You're playing as Flotsam?

Also, side note: Iridium is not only real, but more valuable than gold.
Evilbob 10th Jul 2016, 7:29 AM edit delete reply
Evilbob
Keywords here are "insane doctor". When the insane doctor thinks what you're doing is stupid/crazy... it's probably much, much worse than what you think you're about to do. You know, the same guy who feels that setting you on fire as collateral damage is acceptable because he can just heal you afterwards?

I also look forward to seeing you blow everything up. And having things blow up in your face. It's going to be greeeeaaaaaatttttttttt.

Side note response: Iridium is real. "Irridium", a radioactive, glowing purple material... is not... at least not that I'm aware of.
Pablo360 10th Jul 2016, 9:21 AM edit delete reply
Pablo360
Well, maybe if you covered a sample of iridium-192 with aragonite dust…

(yes, I did just google radioactive iridium isotopes and phosphorescence to make this response, thanks for asking)
Someone 10th Jul 2016, 12:21 PM edit delete reply
Do I smell a Flotsam expy? Yes, I think I do...
Mykin 10th Jul 2016, 4:27 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
@ Pablo360, Evilbob: Huh, I did not know any of that. The more you know, eh?

As for the whole Flotsam expy thing.... To be honest, I had completely forgot that Flotsam existed until way after I made this post and I decided that I really need to get back to listening to FiD again. So I didn't make Azure Sky with the intent of copying Flotsam. I just thought it would be fun to make a character that could sneak grenades into the saddlebags of enemies and then put on some cool shades far away when they go off. The system we're currently using allows us to take hindrances in order to get more character points and so I decided to grab pipsqueak and fixation on explosives just for fun. Pegasus came about because everyone else was playing unicorns and earth ponies and I figured being the token pegasus would be fun too.

Will she actually be an expy of Flotsam? I don't know. I just know she's going to be, at the very least, very entertaining to play.
Someone 11th Jul 2016, 9:36 AM edit delete reply
Oooh, yes, that most certainly seems interesting. Yes. Greatly interesting.
redwings1340 9th Jul 2016, 5:28 PM edit delete reply
redwings1340
I was once rping a semi-evil GM version of myself (though without GM powers, I wasn't the GM in this campaign), and the quest involved taking down a giant bee.

My character freaked out, and made every excuse possible not to go on that quest. In the end, he chose to head to a realm of darkness to try to find where one of the strongest people we've met so far was hiding while everyone else was on this quest. It was easier.

Bees are terrifying. Run away as fast as you can from them. No good will ever come of interacting with bees.
remial 9th Jul 2016, 5:53 PM edit delete reply
I think John Chriton said it best with "This plan is so bad it has to be one of ours!"
Kaze Koichi 9th Jul 2016, 6:10 PM edit delete reply
Bees. My God.
NotMe 9th Jul 2016, 7:50 PM edit delete reply
My introduction into a mad max game had me:
Climb on top of the car I was driving
Jump from that car to another to another
Talk a suicidal zealot into giving me his car
Catching an RPG
Turning the RPG into a bobblehead
Deal with a radiation storm by going outside
And survive a rain of giant acidic amoebas by duck taping myself to the undercarriage of a truck.
Every time the GM had to stop and ask if I was joking. My reply (20 time in total) "Well I already rolled and got a nat. 20 sooo, ya, I think I'll do it"
AlexisToran 10th Jul 2016, 3:21 AM edit delete reply
GM: Are you sure [you want to steal the jewellery from the dead woman in the coffin in a secret basement with blood on the walls]?
New player: Yeah!

And so began a vampire sub-plot which caused us more trouble than the main villain at the time.

The sad thing is that he'd been explicitly warned that "Are you sure?" was GM code for "That's a terrible idea and you should think about it some more". On the bright side, he's never forgotten that lesson.
Boris Carlot 10th Jul 2016, 6:50 AM edit delete reply
"A grenade lands pretty much at your feet. It hasn't gone off yet, so it's probably timer based. You can spend initiative to run for cover. Do you want to?"

"Yeah. I'm gonna jump in the back of the Roadmaster and close the door"

"The Roadmaster? The one that still has three enemies in it? Are you sure?"

"Yeah, screw it. The door is armoured, it can take it."

And that's how I wound up sitting in the back of a Roadmaster with two security guards, including a minotaur variant Troll.

"Free action: I look at the enemy guys and say "Grenade!"

Totally got away with it. That run turned into a clusterf**k, but not because of my choice of cover.
CCC 10th Jul 2016, 12:56 PM edit delete reply
Why not toss the grenade into the armoured car with three enemies in it - and then close the door?
Boris Carlot 12th Jul 2016, 12:56 AM edit delete reply
Didn't think of the it at the time.

Heh, and there are clusterf**ks and then there are CLUSTERF**KS That one ended with three players in jail for life, my character's truck blown up and my character and a dwarf having to lay low in a hole barely bigger than the two of them for three whole days until the heat died down. Not our finest moment.
Malroth 10th Jul 2016, 2:40 PM edit delete reply
Malroth
Are there runs that Don't lead to clusterF*($#s?
Demonu 10th Jul 2016, 7:39 AM edit delete reply
Demonu
"It's basically the DM version of a double-take."

Really? Because in my experience, a DM asking the players 'Are you sure you want to do that?' is tantamount to the players hastily or frantically searching for some other solutions because they think they're going to get screwed over big time by their plan (or the consequences of said plan)
NexAngelus405 10th Jul 2016, 10:01 AM edit delete reply
NexAngelus405
Everybody here is probably going to hate me for this but....

OH NO NOT THE BEES! NOT THE BEES! AHHHHGH! THEY'RE IN MY EYES! MY EYES! AHHHGH!
Pablo360 10th Jul 2016, 1:37 PM edit delete reply
Pablo360
Personally, I prefer the INFINITE SUMMATION HONEYBEE PROFESSOR

EDIT: how is hypertext formed / how URL get hotlinked

EDIT 2: EDIT BOOGALOO: thx
Mykin 10th Jul 2016, 6:13 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
how is hypertext formed / how URL get hotlinked?

Like this: *[*url=the website you want to link to*]* Then what you want linked then [/url].

Obviously you want to get rid of the * in there for it to work. I just needed them there so you can see how it goes.
Sidnoea 10th Jul 2016, 2:56 PM edit delete reply
...why aren't Angel's whiskers touching his face? o.o
Pablo360 10th Jul 2016, 3:12 PM edit delete reply
Pablo360
Because they don't want to.
aerion111 11th Jul 2016, 2:11 AM edit delete reply
aerion111
I like how genuinely Fluttershy is responding here.
She doesn't seem to have noticed that the GM is skeptical to her idea, it's just a 'Yup, that's right *smile*'
CrowMagnon 11th Jul 2016, 6:32 AM edit delete reply
EVERYONE wanted to know if she was serious when Elsbeth the witch in our Carrion Crown campaign wanted to use Magic Jar in order to temporarily possess a Colour From Space.

And it worked.
Jennifer 11th Jul 2016, 12:21 PM edit delete reply
Just last session. The party had wounded and captured a thief, and wanted to interrogate him, but were being very forceful about it.

Me: Sister Valerie, the very large and strong hospital warden, kicks you out and locks the door.
Fighter: I bash the door down.
Me: You splinter the door. Sure you want to continue?
Fighter: Yes.
Me: You've broken partway through the door, when two nurse-warders appear behind you and body-slam you into the wall. They put you in a straitjacket and leave you on a bed in a darkened room.
Fighter: I struggle (fumbles).
Me: You roll off the bed, breaking your nose on the floor.

Thief: While the nurse is distracted, I break in through the window to continue interrogating the thief.
Me: The window on the second floor?
Thief: Yes, I toss a grappling hook up.
Me: By the time you get up there, the nurse is aware of you and slams the window shut.
Thief: I break the window with my magic powers (fumbles).
Me: The glass shatters, driving shards into the just-healed thief. He screams in pain. Sister Valerie storms over and cuts the rope with a handy scalpel. You fall onto your head from two stories up.
Jennifer 11th Jul 2016, 2:34 PM edit delete reply
And today's session was basically two ninja-style thieves helping to corral an angry salamander that had gotten into the royal menagerie and was making a mess.

Thief 1: I try to calm the monster, sort of like Anakin Skywalker in the arena scene in Episode II.
Thief 2: I attack the monster!
Me: At the same time?
Thief 2: Yes!
Me: Angered, it bites you and hurls you against the wall for six points of damage.
(Stunned, he recovers over the next three rounds as Thief 1 *continues* to calm the monster. Then:)
Thief 2: I attack again!
Me: The monster bites you again, for nine points. You're now at negative three. (rolls on crit chart, luckily he does not lose a limb but is thoroughly out of it. Thief 1 finally subdues the salamander and maneuvers it into a cage.)
Brax 15th Jul 2016, 10:09 AM edit delete reply
I was playing with a first time player.
Villager: We need help! There is a orc tribe about to attack our village (Or something)
Player: I need supplies to defeat these orcs!
Villager: Hmm. Okay. Go see the blacksmith.
Blacksmith: What do ya need lassie?
Player: A chain net. A big chain net.
DM: What?
Player: A chain net.
Blacksmith: okay...
Player: I capture the villagers in the net!
Dm: You do?
Player: Yes! And I make them pay me to get out.
She was neutral good.