Page 973 - Riff Tax

14th Oct 2017, 6:00 AM
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Riff Tax
Average Rating: 5 (1 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 14th Oct 2017, 6:00 AM edit delete
Scrapped line:
Rarity: Finally, someone who understands my pain.


Jennifer 14th Oct 2017, 6:07 AM edit delete reply
Ah, MST. What would we do without it?

Given recent news in the entertainment world, that first panel IS creepy. I'm sure it was written months ago, but still.
Jennifer 14th Oct 2017, 6:11 AM edit delete reply
And on the other hand, like any good MSTing they are making useful points.
ANW 14th Oct 2017, 6:33 AM edit delete reply
Riff stories.
Bonus points for riffing yourself.
Guest 14th Oct 2017, 9:49 AM edit delete reply
In the D&D 5e campaign I'm part of, there's one particular NPC we interact with pretty frequently, an elf wizard who acts as our contact with the local adventurer's guild-esque group. But said NPC is extremely depressed, surly, and generally unpleasant, so everyone in the party hates dealing with him. Pretty much every time he talks, somebody will inevitably start ripping on him for being mopey and emo.

We even gave him the nickname "Sad von WizardGuy", and we've called him that so often that apparently nobody remembers his real name, including the DM.
Solitary Performance 14th Oct 2017, 3:45 PM edit delete reply
To the guest account: So, it's Xan from the Baldur's Gate games? He's an eternally depressed-sounding, pessimistic elven wizard... so if your DM is a fan of that series, that might be what influenced it.
Specter 14th Oct 2017, 10:26 AM edit delete reply
Yay, I learned something new. My day has been made.

Group of four in a counter espionage campaign, with our handler being a 2-star general under Princess Luna. We are currently in the epilogue part of story, confronting the big bad, his group, and I did something already really dumb (which the following conversation includes). Best part/worst part of the game, computers where everywhere. After several months of tracking down the big bad, collecting evidence, and stopping his attempts at assassinating H.V.T.s, and abducting ponies, etc. We finally got him, just one more showdown (basically, they escape if we don't show, otherwise they end up being caught, but us either dead or alive). I was relatively safe as I was a computer specialist/mild field agent, I basically just watch the monitors and tell the group anything of note.

The rest of the group is not that important to the story, since they are the group who did the roasting/riffing. It's probably due to the fact I watched two seasons of "Person of Interest" I ended up doing good this.

The big bad was about to escape via Vtol plane that was stationed on top of his multi-touch office building, I say 'was' because the group used up what little influence we had left to call in a strafing run on the roof of the building (which is a lot of influence actually). Confronted, the big bad decided he wasn't going going down without a fight. His main bodyguards, private security, and contracted assassins were by his side. This left his lieutenants (who were quite low on the hierarchy chain if command), most said 'better to die here than prison', the last one 'ehh, I'll take my chances'. Now, we have quite a few followers at this point, more than enough to chase down one lowly lieutenant down before they escape the building. One of our agents however wanted the glory for them self.

Now this lieutenant was the big bad's own daughter, and technically the heiress to the whole thing. She however doesn't want anything to do with it, instead just wants to live a simple life like her friends. This took our interest immediately of course, so we, as a group, decided it was a good idea to watch her. Being the lowest of three targets (another being monk/anktherssassin sumo) I decided to watch the 'looks harmless but possibly deadly super assassin'. By watch, I really mean watch and "Hello, fancy you again, how are you? I'm fine, I'm actually new to town, I recently moved in. Do you think you can help me get my bearings around town". Let's just say my character fell head over hooves for her, and wanted her to escape. Which she did, with my help. The GM was nice enough to make it look like I was failing to some other hacker messing with the externals of the buildings security, but let's face it, I'm going to be facing judgment soon.

After escaping the building I was able to lead her to our teams van... which was as awkward as you could imagine it would be for me, but so much so as there was actually a hacker who had hacked my mic and redan it from my teams headsets, to the buildings loud speakers, and they were turned on, permanently. Now, I had no idea the rest of the team could here me, and they had no idea I plead physically approached my mark. What threw them off was that the two characters had (on my own time) went on a couple of dates, went shopping (which even in a fake world I am horrible at), and even talked about our similarities (where we both agreed on that we don't have real lives, without going into de