Page 1128 - Warren Peace

11th Oct 2018, 6:00 AM in The Return of Harmony, Part 2
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Warren Peace
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 11th Oct 2018, 6:00 AM edit delete
Knowing how to say "you travel a lot and nothing happens" and "you've traveled a lot; now EVERYTHING happens" is still something I struggle with, personally.

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Digo Dragon 11th Oct 2018, 6:25 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
You do much better than the previous D&D GM my local group had, who hits us with a surprise encounter NIGHTLY and always of a really high CR compared to what we'd be able to handle. And when I start using the terrain to get advantage, like hiding in a tree, the GM got mad and started forcing encounters to only happen in open-space plains. The insult to injury was that we never got loot on level with what we fought (we defeated two dragons and both times he cut the loot by 60%).

That got tiring quick and our group ditched his campaign.
Guest 11th Oct 2018, 7:34 AM edit delete reply
the GM we had for Shadowrun and D&D was always really stingy with loot as well, then we played in an Earthdawn game, with a different GM, where the economy is based on silver, so gold is worth 10 silver...
We got a chest of orichalcum coins, a HIGHLY magical metal where each dime sized coin is worth 10,000 silver coins. And they were ALL demonically tainted, so we couldn't spend ANY of it.
After that we got treasure on a more regular basis from our regular GM
Digo Dragon 11th Oct 2018, 8:42 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Ouch! I played a little Earthdawn back in the day, so I feel sympathy for your party getting tainted cash.

But it's good that your regular GM is getting better about the loot! It's nice to hear when things improve and more fun is had. GMs are not easy to come by.
Akouma 11th Oct 2018, 10:13 AM edit delete reply
At the LARP I attend, one of the notable dangers staff loves to use is contact poison. Basically, if you touch something, and you feel vaseline on bare skin, you've been poisoned. You remain conscious for 5 seconds afterwards, and DIE in five minutes if you aren't treated. (Treatment comes in the form of a dedicated spell or potion.) It's real scary stuff if you're not standing right next to a healer, or someone who can bring you TO a healer. If you're wearing gloves you can touch stuff covered in it safely, but you can't CLEAN anything with it unless you have the skill for disarming traps.

So naturally staff absolutely adores putting it all over any loot that has any value. Bonus points if they put the loot in a precarious acid pit. See, if any part of you touches an acid/magma pit (represented by a green/red tarp), you die. No save, report to the gate to death as a spirit immediately. So now imagine you see a shiny of some kind in one of those pits. You gingerly, delicately fish it out with your sword (making extra sure that not even THAT touches because yes, that counts), pick up your reward aaaaand...

It's covered in poison, you fall unconscious into the pit and don't even have the opportunity to get purified. Seen it happen a few times. I've invested in a very sturdy pair of gloves.
Dragonflight 12th Oct 2018, 3:40 PM edit delete reply
I still recall a local LARP group I was part of a long time ago. The game was a mishmash of things from across different timelines and histories. So you had vampires, killer robots, and alien terrors all on the same gamesite.

Anyway, the vampires have obtained the services of a killer Terminator-ish robot. They did this when they realized the robot was programmed to obey one specific person, and they then vamped that person.

So, the vampires had their own Terminator. Yes, this was a thing.

ANYway... They find a chest with the usual stuff inside. The terminator character hands a couple of vials to one of the only living allies traveling with the vampire party. He also hands other loot to other people, but specifically handed the vials to the living guy. Then he turns to look at the Ref after a moment, and asks, "Has the living guy changed at all, yet?"

The Ref rolls a d20 they all have in transparent containers (usually old film roll canisters with my group,) and looks back at the guy holding the vials with a look of sick comprehension dawning on his face as the Ref says, "You definitely feel queasy and really want to sit down right now."

When he asks the party how they intend to fix this, the vampire just shrugs and says, "Well, as I see it, you've got about two minutes to decide if you feel like continuing with our party or not. If not, we can certainly use the health boost. If so, well, let's hope that poison doesn't spoil the taste, yes?"
Xanderman1201 12th Oct 2018, 11:20 PM edit delete reply
I was at my first LARP ever, playing as an NPC. In my first encounter of the evening, a bunch of us were setting up traps in the Inn for the Players' advanced party to disarm, and I was handed two traps to set up.

The first one I just hid behind a trashcan, tagging the wire to the lid so if anyone opened it, they would get blasted. Then I taped the second one to the bottom side of a table, and attached it's wire to the leg of a chair.

So we sneak out, make some ominous comments to the players and leave. We get told later that they found and disarmed all the traps.

The next morning, we're heading back to the Inn as some random villagers, when we hear some of the other NPC's talking about how several of the higher leveled players got blindsided by a trap the advanced party had missed. One of them even died.

The rogues had missed the trap because it was taped to the bottom of a table.

I was so proud.
ThatGuest 11th Oct 2018, 2:20 PM edit delete reply
We found a massive treasure chest once where everything was covered in near lethal acid. It was the same game where the GM was mad that I solved his boring riddle so fast and none of us cared. He then later admitted that he did the acid to spite us because we had 'ruined his fun' seeing us solve the riddle he'd worked so hard on, so he decided we didn't deserve any reward for the adventure.
Guest 11th Oct 2018, 8:11 PM edit delete reply
"Why do you have a stick with a grabbing device on one end and a net on the other? Is it some sort of weapon?"
"No, it's survival gear."
DuoScratch 11th Oct 2018, 9:53 PM edit delete reply
YOU CAN'T DO THAT! You can't cut the treasure to ribbons like that! If you give the encounter, then the loot is fair game, PROVIDED you guys went and FOUND the horde, since Dragons don't carry that with them...omg, I pulled some shit back in my day, but I NEVER cut my players outta their fairly earned loot. Same with EXP, if they dealt with a higher leveled encounter, they got full EXP for dealing with a higher leveled encounter...IT'S ONLY FAIR!!!!
Archone 12th Oct 2018, 3:24 AM edit delete reply
I GMed a Shadowrun game where I was being "stingy" with the loot. Of course I wasn't ACTUALLY being stingy, it's just that the players never quite figured out how to earn more than the base payout for a given Run.

Infiltrate a facility for researching Awakened species to rescue a couple of werewolf pups? Straight past all the biological samples and trophies and whatnot.

Go into an office building? Don't even think about touching those computers.

In a warehouse? Don't touch anything, because Shadowrunners aren't thieves, right?

It's not as if they weren't accustomed to looting in other systems. But it finally came to a head in the final Run of the campaign... one player made a heartfelt, passionate, desperate plea, BEGGING the other players to please, please, please not... steal the gear from the elite Megacorp unit they'd managed to beat. The gear I'd intended for them to have and fence as a nice big payout so their characters could retire.

I was giggling up a storm, before they finally decided to take the stuff and fence it...
albedoequals1 11th Oct 2018, 6:29 AM edit delete reply
Heh, that title. I get it. :P
Specter 11th Oct 2018, 6:34 AM edit delete reply
Yes, a whole army of long legged rabbits. Legions of them. Nothing could possibly stand in our way.

@Digo, you have my sympathies, I too know the dm struggle. Not to the same degree, but to a degree none the less. (Four giant rats against three level two characters (one is an npc)).
Digo Dragon 11th Oct 2018, 8:52 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Thanks. I think one of the most "face-palming" encounters we had was against a group of a dozen large intelligent commando apes. They rappelled down from the trees with pulley harnesses (like what you'd see in the movies) and they used large-sized weapons to fight us.

We lost a horse and some supplies from the fight, but managed to slay them all. Sadly, because all their gear is large-sized, we could not effectively use it and they didn't sell for as much at the market. The rogue in the party got pissed at the GM because he's an engineer IRL and wanted to take one of the rappelling pulley harnesses to study and duplicate. The GM refused to let him, saying it was, and I quote, "too complicated to understand how the gorillas made it". And the player did have several ranks in engineering skills to legitimize his character's knowledge.

It's. A. Pulley.

The engineer player is a retired US Marine. He worked with rappelling devices. It was not an argument that GM should have attempted. :o
DuoScratch 11th Oct 2018, 10:09 PM edit delete reply
I had a pretty face palmy encounter happen to one of my players in a pretty easy fortress crawl they were running, clearing out bandits with some smatterings of cult activities. It was all pretty low level and standard, they were level 3-4s, and most all the mobs were basic level ones.

The problem started, where it often did, with one player in particular that often times got bored when the other players were investigating, and wandered off to kick in doors and look for trouble...he was a big Munchkins fan.

At first, he was doing pretty well, a couple loose and quick one on one encounters with some basic fighter types, that he dispatched with ease. He kept on exploring deeper into the castle while the other players hadn't noticed he'd left yet, and found himself in a moldy library. It was there, that he happened to bump into a couple of rogues, who were in the process of jimmying open a secret door, and he quickly initiated combat, a little too loudly, cuz they noticed him, and got on their guard.

For anyone that has ever ran a rogue squad can guess what happened next. The two rogues split off, and started flanking the poor guy, keeping him perfectly between them, but I always left just a little play in their maneuvers for the dude to bolt to safety if he wanted to...he did not. Way overconfident about the last few encounters, he stood his ground in the middle of the room and just tried to sweep them aside. Now these rogues, they were nothing special, just some basic level one foot-pads with shit gear, but this guy couldn't land a solid hit on them, meanwhile, they were consistently whittling him down with constant backstabs due to flanking. And happened. About 6 turns into the combat one of the rogues rolls up a nat 20...and then aced his confirmation, so I rolled up the damage...and my heart sank. The dice maxed out. Shortsword+Backstab dmg+2 for str totalling 20 damage straight up...far more than the weakened Barb could handle. That rogue heart striked him, killing him outright. I gave him a couple pity saves, but he flubbed the roles.

I gave that guy so many outs, tried to warn him about wandering off, attempted to ease the other's time of finding the wandering Barb, but it was all too little too late. He ended up rerolling a fighter, and played a bit smarter from then on, but also from then on, everyone was VERY sure to remind him about rule one. Don't split the fucking party!
Digo Dragon 12th Oct 2018, 7:45 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Eeyup. Splitting the party is often where most troubles begin.
Specter 12th Oct 2018, 8:25 AM edit delete reply
Funny enough, with how many times I've split the party (both from my own decision and from unfortunate circumstance), I've never ran into any real trouble. One time was because I lost all but one intelligence, and I wandered off into a large dwarf made tunnel system (essentially the deep road from Dragon age), and was there for nine days. The goblins who occupied the caves brought me out when they found me and I got better.

I have yet to get in trouble for splitting the party.
123notit 11th Oct 2018, 7:39 AM edit delete reply
...Did...Did Discord just hit Twi...and only Twi...with "Wandering Damage"? Really? With a 22 Reflex? And a 1-round condition as well? Hopefully that's just mechanical flavor and not "ambush time". But otherwise, wow that seems old-school and petty.

Perfect. At this point, I wouldn't have DiscorDM any other way.

Trade was pretty common in my campaign's world, so my players typically had "something" happen on the road. One time I think I went too far with it and they came across a caravan a wyvern. The guys were pretty low-level, so you'd think they'd run...Nah, of course they don't, they go in and stealth up behind caravan rubble, ambushing it after securing one of the victims.
The Old One 11th Oct 2018, 10:02 AM edit delete reply
In my experience, players are notoriously stubborn about legging it,even when you try to put "THIS GUY IS TOO MUCH FOR YOU" in glaring but tasteful neon all over the encounter area.

I've found the best way around that is to have the area itself screw over the players after a couple rounds and "somehow" cut them off from the BBG. Beats a party wipe from an encounter that was really only to give them a quick meet and greet.
Hankroyd 11th Oct 2018, 1:06 PM edit delete reply
The best epic fail ever, I had.
Level 2 barbarian (me) and a level 2 rogue try to rescue their level 2 cleric captured by bandits.

We have a gem that the bandits' chief want ... So what should we do was obvious ...

Well ... we devised this clever strategy :
We attacked the bandit camp (around 20 people) ... to maximize our chance : I attacked from the front and the rogue from the rear.

Conversation went like this :
Us - Let's fight.
GM - You really sure ?
- Eeyup.
- You attack the camp ?
- Eeyup.
- All 20 of them.
- Eeyup.
- Despite the fact they seems to have better equipment than you ?
- Yes, it will be valuable loot!
- What about the gem.
- The Barbarian take it, so no one will steal it when we are fighting.
- So, you really really go all out on those more experenced warriors that would be willing to talk and make a trade.
- We don't negociate with bandit. LET'S GO ALL OUT!

It ended as well as you think : Gem is found taken, and we are executed. The wizard's player after facepalming the whole time managed to talk the bandits into joining them and survived.

Very short campaign.

We were so used to be half gods with earth shattering abilities that it never occured to us this was a very very bad idea to act the same way as level two characters.
HappyEevee 12th Oct 2018, 8:52 PM edit delete reply
I tend to play about half my time as a rogue or rogue mix, because (especially 3.5) rogues are a very versatile class with lots of support options (and we need at least one person who can see and disarm traps). I play trapmonkeys, arcane tricksters, pretty much anything but a brutal rogue because I've found the fighters and barbarians can do dmg just fine and if I flank for them a bit in between traps and scouting it's all good.

But what really depresses me about the rogue class is how most players who roll up a rogue immediately start roleplaying as backstabbing assholes who constantly betray and steal from the party as if there's some ironclad rogue code that they must steal from EVERYONE especially if its another PC. In three different campaigns in the last two years, a given player has rolled a rogue (either as a starting character or after a death) and instantly turned into Judas McBackstab. In each case this lead shortly to said rogue's death (once we left a guy to die after he led us into an ambush, another time the cleric turned him over to the local cops, another time we kicked the character out of the party after blowing our cover during a mission) and the players rolled new non-rogue characters and went back to being helpful and productive party members like some invisible switch was flipped in their minds. It's kind of weird.

I've started automatically volunteering to be the party rogue in new campaigns in the hopes that no one else will feel the need to roll one if there's already one in the party, because at this point I really don't trust anyone else to play a rogue. That and there are few things that irritate me worse than players betraying or backstabbing the party "for fun" or because "it's what their character would do." That's the weakest excuse ever for a player willfully hindering the party for their own lolz.
kgy121 11th Oct 2018, 12:24 PM edit delete reply
Link to Wandering Damage Table:
Truthkeeper 11th Oct 2018, 4:58 PM edit delete reply
There's a special hell for people who put multi-page documents on Scribd, which has a paywall, when Google Docs exists.
Ganny 11th Oct 2018, 8:20 PM edit delete reply
I'm hoping this is just a joke, because... well, it seems petty and not-fun otherwise.
Boris Carlot 13th Oct 2018, 5:10 AM edit delete reply
It was an April Fools joke in one of those old DnD magazines.
Archone 12th Oct 2018, 3:27 AM edit delete reply
Fluttershy's expression in that last panel... oh, she's looking WICKED... yeah, her player is enjoying herself.
jdb1984 12th Oct 2018, 11:27 AM edit delete reply
I have an original story in mind. The problem is that they travel a lot, and I don't know how to really pace it so the reader doesn't get bored, but not make it seem like a small world, either.