Page 1312 - Kirin's Empire, Part 4

14th Dec 2019, 5:00 AM in Intermission 13
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Kirin's Empire, Part 4
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 14th Dec 2019, 5:00 AM edit delete
Author: SanneNC

Guest Author's Note: "This was the page where I repeatedly kicked myself for making the emperor's design so complicated.

Also, storytime prompt: What's the most blatant disrespect you've ever seen a PC show to royalty?"

Notice: Guest comic submissions are open! Guidelines here. Deadline: January 27th, 2023.



Digo Dragon 14th Dec 2019, 5:28 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Oh my Celestia, that is genuinely funny. :D

Nicely done, SanneNC!
SanneNC 14th Dec 2019, 5:59 AM edit delete reply
Pffff most of the credit here has to go to my players, I'm basically sharing the highlights of their constant riffing. But glad you like it!
TheStratovarian 14th Dec 2019, 8:17 PM edit delete reply
The final point here is golden. I so love it!
Composer99 14th Dec 2019, 5:29 AM edit delete reply
TwilyDM speaks for all of us DMs/GMs/Storytellers.
Zorro362 14th Dec 2019, 5:33 AM edit delete reply
Polymorphing them into a chicken, mid triumphant villain speech, waiting till the spell was about to wear off then throwing said chicken out the window of the tower which was also on the edge of a cliff.

Granted they were evil royalty who had enslaved us and countless others for our unique skill sets to fuel their war machine.(which we then took over)
FanOfMostEverything 14th Dec 2019, 8:02 AM edit delete reply
Mind you, in Draconic, "adventurers" and "a meal one will regret later" are homophones.
BackSet 14th Dec 2019, 10:37 AM edit delete reply
Well... it's not a lie.
SanneNC 14th Dec 2019, 10:49 AM edit delete reply
With your permission I may need to borrow that quote for use in my campaign, considering the party is going to cross paths with a LOT of draconic-speaking creatures.
FanOfMostEverything 14th Dec 2019, 11:40 AM edit delete reply
Oh, go ahead, by all means.
steeevee 14th Dec 2019, 10:48 AM edit delete reply
Blatant disrespect for royalty?

that would the 'Drunk Rouge Incident'

which we don't speak of, for now lets just say we Made him put a few points into CON after that.. and we stay far, far away from a kingdom which shall remain anon.
Guest 15th Dec 2019, 9:59 AM edit delete reply
"Drunk Rouge" sounds like you applied a light layer of makeup to a tipsy noble.
Winged Cat 14th Dec 2019, 2:09 PM edit delete reply
Winged Cat
Using them for common spell ingredients sets a baseline, I suppose.

There was one dragonborn I played, who eventually managed to become a full dragon with a 1,000-plus-year lifespan. Well before that transformation (but with it prophesied for her future, should she survive long enough), she infiltrated a royal family then thoroughly used the designated heir, befriending him as a kid, seducing him when he became a hormone-addled teenager, keeping him hormone-addled as he became king, seeing him dead from his hormones, and then ruling as a dragon tyrant queen for the rest of her life. Granted, it wasn't blatant enough disrespect that he ever caught on, but he was always a tool to her.
Akouma 14th Dec 2019, 3:35 PM edit delete reply
Most disrespect I've ever seen shown ti royalty. A couple come to mind, both from the same game. So, the PCs are working with a drow kingdom, and when they're first introduced to the king, one of my PCs just ignores him entirely to go hit on the court mage. Like, made introductions then just left the conversation entirely.

The other time was much later when a band of enemy spies had infiltrated their army's camp. At one point, they find a small group hiding out inside of supply barrels right next to the command tent, and one of the PCs in the middle of the fight pokes their head into the command tent, looks at the king, and goes "hey, I know you're having a strategy meeting in here but could you kindly GET OFF YOUR ASS? THERE'S A FIGHT OUTSIDE!"
albedoequals1 14th Dec 2019, 3:37 PM edit delete reply
Does it count if the royalty was not royalty yet? My players time-traveled into the past and met the queen of their time as a child, before she forged her own kingdom with a conquering army. In spite of being friends with the queen in the present, several of them took advantage of the situation to be quite disrespectful. I think she was dropped into a muddy hole at one point.
CrowMagnon 14th Dec 2019, 4:46 PM edit delete reply
"And that was the moment I vowed that nobody would ever push me around again, which made me the person I am today."
aylatrigger 14th Dec 2019, 11:12 PM edit delete reply
This isn't quite in-their-face blatent, but more sneaky not-caring.

So...One campaign we decided we would be a traveling circus. We all had acts and our parts to play in our merry band. ...The GM was not part of this consensus and had made a normal plotline for adventurers. We also had to shanghai two other party members who also were not part of the consensus.

Anyway, the king called our circus to a meeting, and we went because of course he was the king. Our ringmaster decided on a whim to bring one of our exotic animals, a penguin, with us to present to the king as a gift.
The king gave us a normal adventure-esque quest. Of course we were confused as we were but a band of traveling performers and not adventurers, but he was the king, so we accepted. And then we left... And THEN the ringmaster realized that he regretted giving the king the penguin. We really needed that penguin. So... we decided to steal it back. The sneakiest of the performers went and broke into the castle and stole the penguin back.
...Then we left and went on to the quest.
It was investigating some forest disturbance, which turned out to be a portal to some dinosaur land or something. We figured it was above our abilities to do anything, but...we wanted a dinosaur for our circus. Of course. So we did try trapping one. ...I forget if we were successful; I think they had acid spit or something that made it hard.
Anyway, we left the area and figured we should not return. We didn't finish the quest we got, and we overheard from some NPC's that the country got almost destroyed after declaring war on another country, which they accused of stealing a penguin.
andreas002 16th Dec 2019, 10:53 AM edit delete reply
Interestingly, the next Pathfinder Adventure Path actually has the PCs be part of a travelling circus.

Though it's for Pathfinder 2nd Edition, which released back in August 2019.
Story Time 15th Dec 2019, 8:26 AM edit delete reply
Any story when the NPC don't like too much adventurers even when they are forced to work with them?
Guest 15th Dec 2019, 9:40 AM edit delete reply
Does "Highest Imperial Magistrate available, probably of the now late Emperor's family" count as royalty?

If yes then it must be the Legend of the 5 Rings session where two characters decided to have sex in public while under arrest and the Lion Bushi declaring with no irony that "the end justifies the means".

My PC considered himself unworthy of even seppuku, after this fiasco of a session.
Specter 15th Dec 2019, 10:14 AM edit delete reply
I once face slapped a kings son. Good times.

No I did not get in trouble (at the time), despite doing this in front of several knights, other nobles, and I was a race that others looked down on (and a 'filthy' vagabond).

Long story short, he made a derogatory back-handed comment to a royal princess/diplomat who was visiting so she could forge an alliance with us as to be protected from a scary large empire that was expanding.
Aegil 16th Dec 2019, 5:38 AM edit delete reply
Understand that in GURPS, combat rounds are one second long.

PCs are attending a festival and tourney. The herald announces that, for one of the events, the prize would be one of the King's award-winning brood mares.

The PC in question is in conversation with THE ROYAL ENFORCER when he hears this.

PC: *loudly* "Not the Queen!"

Royal Enforcer: *quick draw (broadsword) - success* *attack - critical - slices PC in half* *quick draw (flair) - critical - cleans sword in same motion* *quick draw (broadsword) - successfully sheaths sword despite hideous, cumulative penalty*
Solitary Performance 16th Dec 2019, 11:34 AM edit delete reply
In other words, the enforcer did that fancy draw-slash-sheath thing you always see done in like, Anime and media, in about as much time as it took to blink...
... sounds like all it was missing was the blood spray or PC suddenly realizing they'd been killed and stumbling about the second the sword clicked back in the sheath.
Newbiespud 16th Dec 2019, 12:55 PM edit delete reply
I think this might be one of my favorite stories now.
Cliff_Robotnik 11th May 2020, 6:40 AM edit delete reply
I was running a Devient:The Renegade game set somewhere around the Victorian era, in the USA...

One of the PCs decides to try and take out The President, whom was a member of this... Secret Society made to protect the Americas from supernatural threats, Leage of Extrordinary Gentlemen style...

The President was Theodore Roosevelt, so... You can guess how that went down.

The PC lived because he game Teddy a "jolly good oil' scrap" and actually saved a fairly dull day, and the PC begged to become his apprentice... Had him roll, and... Well....

For the record, Teddy was a entirely mundane build, no supernatural powers.