Page 149 - Heckler's Dilemma

17th Jul 2012, 6:00 AM in Dragonshy
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Heckler's Dilemma
Average Rating: 4.89 (9 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 17th Jul 2012, 6:00 AM edit delete
Feel free to come up with your own caption for the last panel.

Also, big shoutout to all the neat, quirky bronies I met personally at the Northwest Bronyfest meetup! (You know who you are!)

Notice: Guest comic submissions are open! Guidelines here. Deadline: January 27th, 2023.



Karilyn 17th Jul 2012, 6:03 AM edit delete reply
How did I not see this coming? /facepalm

AJ looks vaguely creepy in the last panel with the way that her hair is covering the whites of her eyes.
Guest 17th Jul 2012, 9:47 AM edit delete reply
Hey! Griffons and Changelings are in the Pony Tales Player's Handbook now!
Jason Shadow 17th Jul 2012, 12:40 PM edit delete reply
Jason Shadow
They are?!
They are! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!
kriss1989 17th Jul 2012, 1:56 PM edit delete reply
What, you planning n slaying a jabberwokie or the dreaded bandersnatch?
Stairc 17th Jul 2012, 7:44 PM edit delete reply
Yep. We've got Lapis Lazily to thank. I just helped him polish them a little.
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 11:57 AM edit delete reply
Also, you deserve a major shout-out JasonShadow. You've been doing some kickass development for the system! Lots of your stuff has made it into the Player's Handbook. =)
Jason Shadow 18th Jul 2012, 12:26 PM edit delete reply
Jason Shadow
I'm just glad I can help. It's good to see something like this system get shaped and improved, especially when one has a hand in it. Thanks for the opportunity!
Scapeplan 17th Jul 2012, 1:43 PM edit delete reply
Fluttershy should get the "Plant Wild Shape" feat.
Karilyn 17th Jul 2012, 8:20 PM edit delete reply
I feel like a douche for abusing my own first post (Feel free Newbiespud to tell me not to do it again), but oh well, I finally got 3.5 finished. I'm horribly behind, got a full two more sessions ahead of me to write, and not to mention there's a session on Wednesday. GAH. Why did I have to get so sick last week?

I'm adding in some supplementary material which references stuff from Session 4. Don't click the links unless you want to be spoilered. I swear I'm going to have Session 4 ready tomorrow (lolnope)


Pony Tales: Aspirations of Harmony
Session 01 - The Mystery at Winter's End
Session 02 - Like a Ship Over Troubled Firestorm
Session 03 - The Devil Went Down to Equestria
Session 03.5 - Don't Go Changeling to Try and Please Me (NEW!)
Session 04 - The Price We Paid For Our Mistakes...
Session 04.5 - The Bad Touch

Supplementary Writings
Prologue 01 - Inky Quills: Runaway Writer (By Ranubis)
Prologue 02 - Soaring Song, Quiet Giant (By Oblivious)
Letter 01 - To Double Bass, my Elder Brother (By Soaring Song) (Session 4 Spoilers!) (NEW!)
Letter 02 - To Emerald Waltz, Sister of Charming Waltz (By Soaring Song) (Session 4 Spoilers!) (NEW!)

Pony Tales - Player's Handbook (UPDATED!)
Pony Tales - Pony Handler's Handbook (UPDATED!)
Player Cheat Sheet (In gross need of updating)
NPC Cheat Sheet (In gross need of updating)
NPC Cheat Sheet (Spoiler Free Version) (In gross need of updating)

Fan Art!
Our First Proper Fanart! Colors by Karilyn, Lineart by ThousandYearSunrise (Go read his webcomic)
Heat Wave by Flutterknight
Inky Quills by Flutterknight
Soaring Song by Flutterknight
Charity Plush and Mephisto by ThousandYearSunrise
Conflagria by ThousandYearSunrise (Session 4 Spoilers) (NEW!)

Pony Creator Stuff!
The Current Party (Say hi to Stylus!)
A Quick Little Gag Battle Photo
Karilyn 17th Jul 2012, 8:47 PM edit delete reply
>mfw I was three sessions behind, now I'm only two sessions behind, but after tomorrow I'll be three sessions behind again.
Jason Shadow 17th Jul 2012, 9:25 PM edit delete reply
Jason Shadow
Ooh, an update to this now? I think I might've Callooh Callayed prematurely... I'll leave you with this instead.

I hope trying to catch up doesn't get too stressful. My sympathies and good luck!
EveryZig 18th Jul 2012, 10:15 PM edit delete reply
@ Jason Shadow
Ever since I watched Evangelion that song has never sounded the same...
PrincessSpectra 17th Jul 2012, 10:22 PM edit delete reply
Dat ending to 3.5. =3

Also, Soaring Song:
Stairc 17th Jul 2012, 11:31 PM edit delete reply
*grins* It was fun.

And that's some great art for Soaring. Wonderful. I might have to start giving you custom-suggestions for NPCs!
PrincessSpectra 18th Jul 2012, 7:52 AM edit delete reply
I would love suggestions. Often, the biggest hurdle I have with my art is determining what to draw in the first place. ^_^
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 9:18 AM edit delete reply
Great. Well then, drawing Starlight would be excellent. She's a new character they've convinced to journey with them, a midnight-blue Unicorn with a mane of silver-starlight at night. Her mane is not like Luna's, it's not a section of the night sky, it's all silver starlight.

However, when the light of the sun shines upon her - her mane changes to ripple out in hues that seem more like gemstones than normal colors. Rubies, Emeralds, Sapphires, Diamonds - her mane sparkles like a treasure trove in the sun.
PrincessSpectra 18th Jul 2012, 9:32 AM edit delete reply
I'll see what I can do. ^_^
PrincessSpectra 18th Jul 2012, 10:14 AM edit delete reply
Is her mane ethereal like the princesses' or does she have a specific style?
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 10:31 AM edit delete reply
Right, I should have specified that.

Her mane isn't ethereal, but it still looks like woven starlight in darkness and the shine of gemstones in daylight. The style is similar to the following.
Karilyn 18th Jul 2012, 10:46 AM edit delete reply
So basically Holly Dash's mane, desaturated to about 10 to 20 Saturation. I'll throw together a pony creator for Starlight in about an hour.
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 10:51 AM edit delete reply
I wouldn't know, I'm a terrible artist. =)

And the session 3.5 recap was great Karilyn. I'm looking forward to reading about session 4.
Oblivious 21st Jul 2012, 5:20 AM edit delete reply
Man, if we keep convincing NPC's to join us, we'll have a platoon of ponies causing all kinds of trouble.

...Not that I'm complaining.
Zeeth 18th Jul 2012, 8:18 AM edit delete reply
He's a "flat-sharp-natural"?
Karilyn 18th Jul 2012, 8:48 AM edit delete reply
It's a little bit of musical humor. Flats, Sharps, and Naturals are called "accidentals"

And Soaring Song is a klutz.
Ranubis 18th Jul 2012, 2:58 PM edit delete reply
Soaring may be a klutz, but by far he's had some of the most epic moments of the campaign.
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 9:37 PM edit delete reply
Oblivious 19th Jul 2012, 2:01 AM edit delete reply
I have fans. Yay~!
Raxon 17th Jul 2012, 6:11 AM edit delete reply
This sounds very much like a comment I would make.

Either that, or I would argue that yodeling doesn't count as talking, singing, or anything intelligible, and therefore, perfectly safe.
Zuche 17th Jul 2012, 6:17 AM edit delete reply
Is it too late to say I'm sorry?
PikalaxALT 17th Jul 2012, 6:27 AM edit delete reply
AJ: ... Shouldn't we get to roll first for agility?

DM: Wow, you're right. It's a good thing I'm so sympathetic. You all get 1s.
MirrorImage 17th Jul 2012, 9:30 AM edit delete reply
Rt: "Well, that escalated quickly."
R4ph 17th Jul 2012, 6:37 AM edit delete reply
I would totally buy and wear a "Rocks Fall, Everypony dies" tshirt.
Saddlesoap Opera 17th Jul 2012, 6:39 AM edit delete reply
I have actually seen someone wearing a "Dice Fall... EVERYONE ROCKS." shirt.
kriss1989 17th Jul 2012, 1:58 PM edit delete reply
Sounds like what happens when my players go crazy. As in useing-rainbow-fairy-magic-fire-underwater against a submerged shambling mound before psychically blasting the thing to pieces.

When they play it safe, the dice hate them. When they do the crazy the dice love them.
Destrustor 17th Jul 2012, 3:27 PM edit delete reply
My brother once decided to attack a bandit by throwing a dead weasel at him. He rolled a natural twenty and choked the bandit to death instantly. The die he rolled became legendary for always rolling insanely high on crazy-stupid actions.
He almost killed my character with that die and a loaf of bread.
Digo 17th Jul 2012, 7:18 AM edit delete reply
The shirt should have an image of Tom too. :D
Zarhon 17th Jul 2012, 6:41 AM edit delete reply
Huge diamonds fall, Rarity dies.

Also, I see what you did there.

I don't get why the DM suddenly snapped at AJ though. AJ wasn't doing that much heckling, hell, she was playing better than the others so far. And that is a perfectly valid point.

Guess their DM is just crazy.
StorytellerSJK 17th Jul 2012, 6:45 AM edit delete reply
Please. Rarity is no more vulnerable than the Grimace. And NOTHING can kill the Grimace. :)
BadHorse 17th Jul 2012, 7:26 AM edit delete reply
1) She's one of the more reasonable players, but she just caught him with the two cliffs thing, and then the unnecessary, "Yeah, we know what a landslide is, DUH" comment.

2) She's clearly not whispering in that second panel, i.e. that's the condition set for causing an avalanche.
Cyberfox 17th Jul 2012, 1:47 PM edit delete reply
I'm pretty sure the DM was just messing with AJ for exactly that reason. Honestly, I can't see the DM possibly being serious here.
Zarhon 17th Jul 2012, 6:51 AM edit delete reply
I'm starting to imagine the DM being played by Pinkamena Diane Pie...
Umiyuri Papaeyra 17th Jul 2012, 1:41 PM edit delete reply
Umiyuri Papaeyra
This is Spud nowadays. He pretty much functions exactly like this DM.

It's my fault entirely.
Raxon 17th Jul 2012, 1:58 PM edit delete reply
You should be ashamed of yourself! I don't see a single one of those boulders made of scorpions or on fire! You've been making him soft! This is the reason we can't have nice things that go boom!
Umiyuri Papaeyra 17th Jul 2012, 3:24 PM edit delete reply
Umiyuri Papaeyra
Raxon 17th Jul 2012, 6:52 AM edit delete reply
If we don't have a story, I'll ask.

What is the most bizarre or ridiculous campaign premise you've ever played?
Boden King 17th Jul 2012, 7:19 AM edit delete reply
Give me a few weeks to answer that. By that time our current campaign should be over and we should move on to our friend's younger brother campaign. I mention this for three reasons: he's a big Dr. Who fan, we get a Tardis at the beginning, and this is still D&D 4e. I'm looking forward to seeing how my warforge holds up.
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 7:38 AM edit delete reply
There was this one time where I tried to run a BESM campaign and told all the players "Okay. Pick one story element or world element you want in the campaign."

That... didn't last long.
Raxon 17th Jul 2012, 7:38 AM edit delete reply
Wait... you're playing a warforge in a game where sonic screwdrivers exist?

Man, and I thought rust monsters were bad.

Speaking of rust monsters, I have a campaign gathering dust in the files here where everyone gets banished to an odd demiplane, where the two dominant races are rust monsters, and slimes/jellies. They're sentient, reasonable, and very much at war with each other. My favorite part is this rust monster cafe where the team gets a rude awakening realizing that the rust monsters aren't just trained pets, they're the inhabitants. They can also talk and object strongly to seeing their kind killed.

The slimes and jellies can also talk, and they are equally unhappy about any of their kind the party kills.
Digo 17th Jul 2012, 7:39 AM edit delete reply
Most bizzare? Mafia Toon.
We were all 1920s cartoon gangsters given a mission by the Godfather to break into a museum and steal the "MacGuffin" (that's what it was actually called). However, an opposing Yakuza gang was also after the same thing.

The Team--
Vinnie Mozzarella: A large, wisecracking bear with a huge tommygun he nicknamed "GigaGat". It had a dial to select different types of ammo (the player made his own list to roll randomly), but none of them were actual bullets. One time he shot holes into a Yakuza car by firing Gameshow Podiums.

Tony Provalone: A slick weasel who was the getaway driver. Except he was a terrible driver. One time caused the team car to explode just by turning the ignition-- note there was no bomb in the car. Nor gas in the tank.

Matahari Parmesan: The black cat femme fatale of the team. She used her charm, smooth words, and a handbag full of bricks to get men around her finger. Or under her heel.

Stragus deRicotta: The Godfather's "portly" mouse nephew, he was the pampered one who was on the mission for... well we don't know. Can't handle a gun, can't drive, not that bright, but somehow always has access to a good pasta dish. Hey, gangsters get hungry.

Iggy (Munster) Valentine: The little raccoon street urchin adopted by the "family" off the streets. He looks up to the other members as role models (against his better judgement), but hates his 'cheesy' surname, adopting Valentine from a romance novel he once read (only the first 3 pages). Iggy had street smarts, a smart mouth, and a rubber pocket knife that bounces back so hard Iggy takes the damage. Tended to be the butt monkey whenever the whole team enacted a really bad plan. which of often.

Note that the GM didn't know everyone planned out the cheese name theme. We kinda surprised him on that so well that he started giving the named Yakuza members meat names.
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 10:24 AM edit delete reply
I haven't really played too many strange games.

I've tried to run a few though.

The strangest one involved the players being time travelers who each had a different means of time travel and skillsets (magic, super high tech, style, whatever), being made to work "together" by a mad king who rules over a place sorta outside of the timestream, they also each were part of a secret faction (and I didn't tell anyone that there were other secret factions besides theirs), so they had the king's goals in any particular time as well as their factions and at least one person's faction goal would directly conflict with the king's. On missions they could find power ups which were actually located in cubes that floated in the air or sat on stuff that only time travelers could see. Additionally they could get Achievements for doing certain things (some of these were quite meta like being the first person to post) that gave some benefits.

It never got past the first mission sadly. It was set in the garden of eden. (Which was a giant hedge maze filled with dangers.)

Mad GodKing: Adam doesn't eat the Fruit of Wisdom and lives.

Player1: get a peice of the apple. note: get, not eat.
Player2: Get Lilith to eat the apple (doesn't have to be the whole thing)
Player3: kill the serpent
Player4: get one of Adam's ribs
Player5: Get Adam and Eve to both eat at least a bite of the apple
Player6: Convince the Serpent to join Yami (that player's faction).

If people eat the Apple:
The first person gets the Achievement "The Prettiest One"
All eaters gain a one use Trojan horse secretly full of Trojans who will default to attacking the nearest non-Trojans.
Ponyfodder 17th Jul 2012, 11:12 AM edit delete reply
Playing or running Gamma World always becomes very silly, whether you want it to or not.

As DM, I have-
Made "Cupcakes" Pinkie a big bad, complete with an army of sentient baked goods
Had my players craft a motor home that took up 3 lanes and was the size of a two-story house.
Had a player in my party who was a sentient chia pet. When that died, he managed to roll up sentient shrooms (yes, the drug)
That same player was in a party with a telekinetic android who thought it was Mr. Rogers.
In a separate game, someone re-animated the corpse of a dead enemy Frankenstein-style.

As a player, I have-
Been in a party with a tree that was always on fire.
Been in a party with a one man red-shirt army.
Been in a party with Kitt (of Knight Rider fame) who happened to be a transformer.
Made a hybrid-horse/helicopter out of a horse, a ceiling fan, and liberal application of duct tape.
Made a character based on dive-bombing people from said horseicopter
Looted the exo-suit from Aliens (This one is actually in the game)
Killed robo-santa and his army of elf drones by punching him so hard that both of us fell out of the space-time continuum.
Destrustor 17th Jul 2012, 6:59 PM edit delete reply
It wasn't the campaign's actual premise, but one time we decided before the game that our characters would fight using ridiculous weapons: my character fought using a book as a bludgeoning weapon, my brother fought with an oar and another guy's weapon of choice was a stool (the three-legged, made-of-wood that you sit on kind of stool)
We poured a lot of resources into those weapons, eventually upgrading them to new heights of silliness. Each was re-forged with actual metal and (with the help of a genius mad-tinkerer insane dwarf) given a few crazy features:
The oar was a fire-channeling pain stick with an automatic bear trap fitted at the end,
The stool was fitted with three retractable auto-spinning morningstars,
And my book (my actual spellbook, in fact) was a metal-bound clockwork spiked monstrosity that could be shifted between its normal book form, a warhammer form, a morningstar form and an awesome scythe form with the touch of a button. Each form actually held a different enchantment and the thing was so complicated that it needed an int check just to get it to change forms.
And every time it was upgraded I added something to its name so by the end my book was called "Dark Neo-Thodin X Mark III"
I loved that book...
Greywander 17th Jul 2012, 10:16 PM edit delete reply
If there's one thing JRPGs have taught me, it's that there is no such thing as an improvised weapon, only weapons you don't have training for. This also applies to anime. For example...

Hula hoops
Paint brushes
Other characters
Words (either swing around a giant word or causing physical damage by talking)
Cooking utensils
Small animals

You have to admit, swords are cool and everything (not to mention practical), but they're used so often that it isn't really memorable. You will, on the other hand, remember the four chosen heroes who fight using a banana, sofa, woodchuck, and hula hoop.
Masterofgames 18th Jul 2012, 2:43 PM edit delete reply
I believe I have mentioned the Baron's Festival in a prior post somewhere. The rod of wonder duel sums this up rather nicely.
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 6:58 AM edit delete reply
Don't worry, Applejack. It will all be worth it to see Fluttershy shine.

TS: Alright, gang. I'm going to try using Diplomacy on it.
RY: If that doesn't work, I'll try flattering it. And maybe see if I can't get a few jewels out of it.
PP: And if that doesn't work, I'll throw it a party!
AJ:...Alright. And if that don't work-
DM: Oh, would you look at that? As you were climbing over the rubble of the landslide, you seemed to have gained an Aura of Hostility. Your friends care about you, so they are unaffected, but if you get within 20 feet of that dragon, it will wake up and feel compelled to do everything in its power to END YOU.
AJ:...I'll just stay out here then.
Digo 17th Jul 2012, 7:21 AM edit delete reply
Rarity is making a face I did one time when we had a "Rocks Fall" incident. I was the rogue so I'll caption what actually happened that time...

Rarity: "Reflex saves! Women with Evasion first!"
AppleJack: "...thanks."
Xander Cruize 17th Jul 2012, 7:47 AM edit delete reply
AJ: What'd I tell ya 'bout if you haven't thought of it?

GM: Right, sorry.
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 7:54 AM PONY TALES SEGUE! edit delete reply
The current Pony Tales character sheet, while it has excellent stats, is poorly organized. In an attempt to streamline the system, here's my take. Parts in [Brackets] are repeated as necessary.

--Horse Sense

--Total HP
---Current HP
--Total MP
---Current MP
--Current PiP
--Current Harmony

-Utility talents
[--Racial ability
---Description of Racial Ability]
[--Utility Talent
---Description of Utility Talent]

-Combat Talents
[--Combat Ability
---Description of ability]

-Special Talents
--Cutie Mark
---Effect of Cutie Mark
---Effect of Element
--Special Move
---Effect of Special Move
Oblivious 17th Jul 2012, 8:41 AM edit delete reply
Well, we don't exactly have a "sheet" per se, may want to see what Stairc thinks of it.
Karilyn 17th Jul 2012, 8:44 AM edit delete reply
I actually have my own private character sheet which I use for myself which uses tabs for Attributes and Skills, making the whole thing rather horizontal, as opposed to vertical.

| Athletics   10 | Precision   5 | Knowledge  8 | Horse-Sense      5 |
| Stunts(+3)  13 | Acrobatics  5 | Arcana     8 | Perception       5 |
| Endurance   10 | Stealth     5 | History    8 | Persuasion(+5)  10 |
|                | Mechanics   5 | Heal(+3)  11 | Streetsmarts     5 |

lol my stats are so messed up since I switched from stalker to berserker, and now my cutie mark is all in the wrong place so I don't have a +18 stat anymore. Oh well, Persuasion is rolled so often, having +10 in it is a good thing. And I have definitely no intent to change my cutie mark.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 9:03 AM edit delete reply
I just formatted mine the same way all the samples are done. Seemed easiest (except for getting that picture on there, centered and sized right).
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 9:05 AM edit delete reply
Hmmm. I just realized....

Unicorns and Earth Ponies get six Utility talents each, whereas all other races (thus far) get five. It makes sense, kinda, given that all other races (thus far) can fly (or is a changling).
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 9:26 AM edit delete reply
That's interesting, because Changelings can fly. And since that was NOT mentioned in the players handbook, I can assume by other races you mean other playable races, which could also include griffons, buffalo, zebras, mules, cows, sheep, dragons, sea serpents, and any other sentient race that shows up in the show.

Except that of those, only griffons can fly. So, yeah...
The Guest 17th Jul 2012, 9:52 AM edit delete reply
Dragons can't fly?
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 9:54 AM edit delete reply
Dragons are kinda OP for the pony setting.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 10:06 AM edit delete reply
Well, playable dragons would be like Spike, and when he did his whole Greed thing, he couldn't fly.
Raxon 17th Jul 2012, 10:53 AM edit delete reply
I dunno, I could play a full-sized dragon that's not OP.

Me: Don't worry! I'll help you make enough cookies! *rolls* Oops, I sorta tore the door off the oven. That's okay, I'm a dragon, I don't need an oven. *rolls* Oh... We have more ingredients, right? And plenty of non-melted cookie sheets?

When you're a full-sized dragon, pretty much every household task requires a precision roll.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 11:17 AM edit delete reply
Or, and hear me out here, just a much, much bigger household.
Raxon 17th Jul 2012, 11:30 AM edit delete reply
Well, sure, my household would be nice and big, I live in a cave. But I can't serve dragon-sized cookies, they'd flatten the ponies! No, I'd have to help them bake using pony sized ovens.
Zeeth 17th Jul 2012, 7:56 AM edit delete reply
My brother in law always starts out a new campaign by declaring everyone in the party dead. "And now that I have that out of my system, let's begin!" It's usually by falling rocks.
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 7:59 AM edit delete reply
Here's an idea: Start out a campaign by announcing that every character is dead.... and you're going to be RPing how they got there.
Digo 17th Jul 2012, 8:30 AM edit delete reply
I did something close to that.

I ran a "LOST" adventure where the players all wash up on shore in the middle of a plane crash. None of them remember ever being on the plane but the manifest says they were aboard. They banded together and began exploring the island.

The island had several large science facilities, all run by a group calling themselves the "Secret Masters". The players didn't have any direct visial contact with them, only their minions who kept trying to kill the PCs.

At the end the party broke into the Secret Master's central bunker. They learned that *THEY* were the Secret Masters and had accidently crashed that plane (and lost their recent memories) when trying to use an experimental teleporter to leave the island.


Because the island was about to be hit with a falling meteor. Cue rock falls, everyone died. :D
Zuche 17th Jul 2012, 9:41 AM edit delete reply
That was masterfully evil. Well played.
[witty name goes here] 16th Nov 2012, 4:47 PM edit delete reply
Wasn't that a movie or something?
Zuche 17th Jul 2012, 9:34 AM edit delete reply
That was one part of the charm of Planescape: Torment.
Darkside 17th Jul 2012, 11:19 AM edit delete reply
That reminds me of my ex's first D&D game. After we spent the night at an inn, our GM (My brother-in-law) declared "You all wake up dead."

Her face was priceless.

Which then reminded me of the campaign I'm currently in, where statements like that are a matter-of-fact, because all the player characters (save one) are agents of the afterlife.
Qin The Kirin 17th Jul 2012, 8:52 AM edit delete reply
as one of my master used to say every time he whas about to try to kill the party. "ya valieron Burger" XD. it whas is very persona for to say you are condemned.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 8:59 AM edit delete reply
So this is off topic, and it probably would be more appropriate at page 150, but...

You guys wanna see something interesting? Go back to page 1 of the comic, and check out the comments section, and compare it to a current page's comments. Not just number, but content and people as well. Newbie, you should be pretty happy about it.

For added fun, go back and find your very first comment on the site. Mine was waaaaaaaay back on page 10.
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 9:41 AM edit delete reply
Technically, my first post was on page 14. I was the Guest who said that Applejack gaining money was essentially useless since the mane six never buy any supplies in the show. My first post as Lyntermas was on page 34, and the first of my trademark alt-scripts was on page 35 (although the official name wouldn't come until later).

Oh, how far we've come since then.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 10:04 AM edit delete reply
I love it. I feel... well not old, but like I'm a high school Senior again. Yeah, we're not in charge, but we still run this place.
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 10:51 AM edit delete reply
Ran through the archives, here are only a few of the first posts of our "regulars".

Stairc – page 83
Ranubis – page 34
Kaleopolitus – page 29
DragonTrainer – page 11
Umiyuri – page 12
Kris1989 – page 11
MirrorImage – page 16
Erin Palette – Page 3
Raxon – Page 7
Azureink – page 22
Akouma –page 33

And now a moment of silence for major contributors we haven't heard from in a while: Chris, ShikomeKidoMi, AstroTrain, terrycloth, Derpmind, Limey Lassen, xuincherguixe, banjo2E.
Raxon 17th Jul 2012, 11:53 AM edit delete reply
To be fair, I didn't find the comic until quite a bit later, but I still commented.

Aaand now I think I have to go back and leave a comment on page one on principle.

In fact, when this comic reaches #200, let's all go back and post on comic #1! It'll be fun!
On an unrelated note, this comment section really needs to be able to support the BGColor tags. My texty voice just isn't the same with this white background!
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 12:03 PM edit delete reply
Yeah, I noticed when I checked comment updates and found a dozen or so on 4-month old pages, and had to go through each one and find out who it was.
magewolf 17th Jul 2012, 12:54 PM edit delete reply
good thing ya did'nt mention me cause ah aint dead yet!
actualy we moved the ofice and that's where ah have internet, that's why ah was gone since around #120.
ah need ta do a ROCK'S FALL! moment in the usagi yojimbo game ah'm runing.
Derpmind 17th Jul 2012, 7:44 PM edit delete reply
Huh? I was a major contributor? I, uh, don't think I've ever really said anything much on these comments. Well, besides the Rainbow Dash rants, but I can't even find the page they're on, heh.

See, the thing is, I've never played DnD or any other 'Pen & Paper' game, so compared to all of you who have so many silly, amazing, epic, and silly stories and other stuff about roleplaying, there's not much I even can say. I still read some of the comments though, because y'all are totally rad.
LoganAura 18th Jul 2012, 12:09 AM edit delete reply
I have no bucking clue where my first comment was :/ Not really that far back, that much I'm sure about.
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 10:54 AM edit delete reply
I'm a regular now!

*happy dance*
Raxon 18th Jul 2012, 11:40 AM edit delete reply
Me too! Time for a fitting song!

I actually wanted the Me First and the Gimme Gimmes cover of the song, but could not find it immediately available to play anywhere. Oh well.
darkwulf23 17th Jul 2012, 8:59 AM edit delete reply
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 9:01 AM edit delete reply
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 9:02 AM edit delete reply
Witchcraft reference.
MirrorImage 17th Jul 2012, 9:41 AM edit delete reply
And now I'm tempted to put an Abba song on my computer and work that joke into my campaign...

DM: "You trigger an abbalanche."
P: "An avalanche?"
DM: "No, an abbalanche" *Mamma Mia, here I go again*
The Guest 17th Jul 2012, 9:58 AM edit delete reply
Abacuses fall, everypony multiplies?

Zuche 17th Jul 2012, 9:42 AM edit delete reply
WATERLOO! Couldn't escape it I wanted to...
ShadowDragon8685 17th Jul 2012, 9:09 AM edit delete reply
Rarity: You "know what you're doing," huh?
AJ: Eeeeyup. No way I was missin' a chance to make a DM shout that line.

(Though I think Xander's line is better.)
deeman45 17th Jul 2012, 9:11 AM edit delete reply
Why is everyone getting mad at the DM? AJ's the one to blame here--he did warn them about the consequences of loudness after all. Not to mention his buttons had obviously already been pushed previously.

Also, look at her smug face in panel 1.
Zuche 17th Jul 2012, 9:46 AM edit delete reply
Well, yeah, but she's correct. The DM warned about the consequence of loud noises. AJ just pointed out why that warning should have been a moot point. To quote a certain ambassador out of context:

"The avalanche has already started. It is too late for the pebbles to vote."
Jason Shadow 17th Jul 2012, 10:02 AM edit delete reply
Jason Shadow
I've been having fun putting together characters for the Pony Tales: Aspirations of Harmony rules system, so I thought I'd put together something akin to a third-party sourcebook. Thus, I now introduce to you:

Jason Shadow's Plethora of Pony PCs

Of course, it's not much of a "plethora" right now, considering that I've only made two characters of each race so far, but I intend to add to the list periodically.

For additional fun, check out the pair of Joke Templates that I've made.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 10:33 AM edit delete reply
I love the Sweetie Bot template.
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 10:36 AM edit delete reply
Huh, the joke templates are actually well thought out.
Stairc 17th Jul 2012, 11:34 AM edit delete reply
Yes, Sweetie Bot template is amazing!

I've added both your plethora and your joke templates to the Player's Handbook. =)
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 11:45 AM edit delete reply
Ugh, quit adding stuff! I have to keep redownloading it.
Stairc 17th Jul 2012, 11:52 AM edit delete reply
Sorry buddy, people are coming up with fantastic options. It's not my fault. =)

That's why it's on google docs though, so you don't have to download it.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 12:01 PM edit delete reply
I'd rather have it on file then have it bookmarked. The amount of documents I've seen online and lost because I tried to remember where to find them...
Stairc 17th Jul 2012, 12:10 PM edit delete reply
Makes sense. But, the system is meant to be ever-expanding and built by the efforts of the community. However, anything that goes into the source books will be approved and often polished by me - as well as checked for balance issues.

Of course, comments are fair game - if I put additional rules or references to third party material in a comment (like the joke templates); it means I want to share it but it might not be balanced and requires DM approval to play.

This way, we can build the system as a community without running into those problems of most community projects, which have 200 people all working in completely different directions.

I'm really looking forward to it.
AlicornPriest 18th Jul 2012, 7:12 AM edit delete reply
Well, instead of continually adding new stuff to the main book, why can't we have a "core rulebook" and make the other stuff "expansions?" Keep the core races/tribes as "earth pony, unicorn, pegasus" and make griffons and changelings the "Evil Race Expansion."
That way, if you get more races, like zebras or donkeys, they can just go into an expansion instead.
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 11:00 AM edit delete reply
That's probably a good idea too. Of course, I'll still want to add talents to the main rulebook, but making a Non-Pony Race expansion could be easier for categorization. Hmm... To take Griffons and Changelings out of the core rulebook or not... Hard to say. I don't know if there's anything particularly wrong with having them in there. The race section is so small as-is, but then there's no really good reason not to add in the other races when we come up with them. And I really don't want to clutter up the player's handbook with 10 racial options.

Hmm, probably should make the whole thing an expansion with a link to it in the core rulebook races. Any thoughts? Send me a PM if you have a preference.
AlicornPriest 18th Jul 2012, 11:25 AM edit delete reply
Well, how's that forum idea coming along? I found Forumotion online, and that doesn't seem particularly difficult. We make an "core book" post/thread, a "canon expansions" thread/subforum, and a "Developer's Corner" subforum for new concepts to add.
I was thinking we do the same thing for the traits and abilities. Make a "Big Book of Traits" expansion, or make a "Cleric" splatbook for extra Cleric-like abilities.
Lastly, I think we could also use an errata page. I don't want to have a character where my skills should have changed and I didn't know about it.
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 11:30 AM edit delete reply
The idea is great. I just haven't had any time to implement it yet with my workload.

... Wow, I just realized - Pony Tales hasn't even been open to the public a week yet and we already have all this awesome community development. I can't wait to see what happens in a month!

Keep up the great work guys. Let's turn this into something special.
AlicornPriest 18th Jul 2012, 11:36 AM edit delete reply
Well... err, that is... I'm not too busy...
I mean, I could do it... that is, if you don't mind...
But, obviously, you'll have full control over it, admin rights and whatnot. Is there a specific site you'd prefer? It looks like we're pretty spoiled for choice.
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 11:41 AM edit delete reply
Awesome! That's great AlicornPriest, it'd be great if you put it together.

Forumotion is fine. My own D&D game forum (created by my players) is hosted on that too. Sure, go for it.

tuxgeo 17th Jul 2012, 11:45 AM Re: Plethora of Pony PCs edit delete reply
Nice example ponies. I wish I could write backgrounds that evocatively.

What am I missing about Shady Wisp's attributes? The 6, 8, 6, 7 array only uses 7 of the 8 available points. Is there a system feature that gives a benefit (and that I missed) in exchange for losing 1 point of attribute?
Stairc 17th Jul 2012, 11:56 AM edit delete reply
Not that I know of. Probably just a mistake.
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 12:41 PM edit delete reply
Oh Stairc I e-mailed you some more races. Player races this time!

I'll post them here too.

Donkeys migrated to the Equestrian continent in the pre-equestrian era, arriving out of former slavery by the Sphinxes. They have since become a staple of the nations, not necessarily achieving recognition but most definitely being an important part of the work force. Donkeys don't have the magic connection ponies have, but make up for it with big hearts and an innate understanding of the peoples of the land.

Racial traits:
--Stalwart: Donkeys gain an additional 2 attribute points at creation.
--Intense: Instead of a 10 point attribute max, donkeys have a 12 point attribute max.
--Hardworking: Donkeys gain two magic points instead of one every day.

Prior to the arrival of the Windigos, Pigs were in charge of the Roaming Empire in the land that would become Equestria. However, the coming of the great winter destroyed their empire; the survivors would later integrate with Equestria as a mercantile culture. Modern pigs are eager to earn bits and, in fact, have no qualms selling their dead to carnivores, a fact which creeps ponies out.

Racial Traits:
--All the training: Pigs get trained in an additional skill.
--Conniving: Once a day, a pig gets to roll two d20 instead of one and choose the higher result.

The natives of the foreign lands, Zebras live in small tribes and places filled with large carnivores. Zebra culture practically devotes itself to the ideals of harmony, and Zebras will work for the greater good in any situation. The fact that they live in dangerous and unusual environments gives them a hardier work on life.

Racial Traits:
--Tribal tattoo: Zebras gain a cutie mark bonus.
--Dangerous domain: Three times a day, a Zebra can ignore a critical failure. That is, they will not automatically fail on a critical failure, they will only fail after bonuses.

Cows cohabited the lands ponies lived in during the pre-equestria era, and a number of small cow families joined them in their migration. However, the majority of cows remained in the old lands, forming their own empire in response to the rise of Celestia and Luna; while Equestrian cows and Astarian cows are friendly, there is a constant presence of potential war between the two countries as a whole.

Racial Traits:
--Herd Mentality: Cows gain access to a second Element of Harmony.

Goats are arrogant, intelligent, and antisocial. A large majority of technological innovators have been goats, and they are currently spearheading the field of electronics. Despite this, they remain diplomatic to the other Hooved races and are loyal to a fault with those they consider their friends.

Racial Traits:
--Inventor: All goats get Create Crazy Contraption as a racial.
--Thick-headed: Goats get a +3 bonus to all save rolls.
Raxon 17th Jul 2012, 1:03 PM edit delete reply
Okay, my monsters are sent. Brace yourself for some true abominations. I keep thinking Cyutulu should have some kind fanatical worshipers. Some horrors of the deep. Something that goes "SHOO BE DOO"...

I wonder where I could find such a creature.

Oh, and also, yes, please check for balance issues. Cyutulu is supposed to go after innocent ponyvillians when it's done with the party. Plenty of time to kill it afterwards, while it attacks the innocent bystanders. There's no hurry.
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 11:56 AM edit delete reply
Folks, just for the record... Raxon's critters are awesome.

I can't wait till the Forum's up so we can share them all. Heck, if you want to show the rough drafts of them here too Raxon - feel free. They're great. =)
Jason Shadow 17th Jul 2012, 12:42 PM edit delete reply
Jason Shadow
Oh, yeah. That's a mistake. I'll fix it right away.
EDIT: Responding to the Shady Wisp issue.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 12:50 PM edit delete reply
Damn. I was kinda joking with those other races, but...damn.
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 12:53 PM edit delete reply
Demonu 17th Jul 2012, 1:18 PM edit delete reply
Though I hardly see anyone picking pig or com for a long running PC for being the least aesthetically pleasing among them. Don't see much min/maxing potential in them either.

Meh, personal opinion anyways...
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 1:22 PM edit delete reply
I thought that having two elements would be quite potent. Though maybe pigs are underpowered...
Demonu 17th Jul 2012, 2:40 PM edit delete reply
Having 2 elements yes.
But you'd still have 1 magic point to spend, meaning you can still activate just 1 a day. Only difference being you can alternate from day to day but when you're in a party with 4 or 5 people, you've pretty much got all the bases covered.
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 2:46 PM edit delete reply
Should I have the cows get an extra magic point?

....actually that makes thematic sense.
Masterweaver 17th Jul 2012, 7:47 PM edit delete reply
MirrorImage 17th Jul 2012, 7:39 PM edit delete reply
That shouldn't be an issue (not picking a race for a long campaign, that is) - make them anyways so a DM has something to work on character creation wise. If I need a angry shop-keep kind of character, knowing a Griffon could fit the bill means I can grab it from the PH instead of having to improvise.

Because the party WILL try to rob a shop at least once in the campaign, if for nothing else than to see how creative your "Rocks fall, everyone dies" is.
Zarhon 17th Jul 2012, 12:11 PM edit delete reply
Campaign time!

Part Skeletor: Rolf's too sexy for his bones.

Rolf & Skitter

13 (Rofl), 2 (Skitter)

You observe the rooms a bit more closely. You glimpse a shadow moving slightly at the left-hook hallway.


Int check
8 - 5 = 3

You try to imagine what Rolf would do, in an attempt to think out a solution. Sadly, the mental imagery of a sweat-dripping Rolf derails any attempt of dealing with the actual problem.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 12:19 PM edit delete reply
"Mraaaah!" She started hitting the wall with her head, trying to get the thoughts out of her head.

Horizon's reaction will just be "WTF?"
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 12:28 PM edit delete reply
Rolf hugs the wall and whispers to Skitter. "I think I see some movement around the bend, but I can't tell what it is. Should we hope it's a cleric and shout "Friend or foe?", or do you want to shadow jump around the corner to surprise him?"
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 12:37 PM edit delete reply
Skitter nods and tries to appear behind where he thinks the movement came from.
(Not sure how far away it was. If it wasn't really close he'll sneak closer first since he can't really teleport very far.)
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 12:31 PM edit delete reply
"Yeah, I don't think that's going to work." Horizon was back at the top of the wall watching Tiffany assault it with her forehead. "But there's a gate over there that will probably respond better, if you're intent on bashing through something." He drops down again, and decides to wait for her to work out the situation. He examines the flowers, looking for anything of alchemical value, silently hoping to hear the sharp clang of head on metal.

Alchemical lore check, I guess. I also got in one last post on the last page.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 12:33 PM edit delete reply
Tiffany went over and opened the gate by smashing it open with her hammer and walking over to Horizon, all while giving him a rather annoyed look.

Ehehehe, I put in one last post as well.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 12:37 PM edit delete reply
Found your way in, did you? Entrance is over there. Don't worry, I don't think you'll have to use you knees to pry it open. Hands should work fine." He laughs inwardly; if she could see his face, she would get an eyeful of the biggest, stupidest, mocking grin one could hope to see on someone as serious as him.

Edit: Why would Horizon losing his clothes make Skitter fall in love with Tiffany?
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 1:02 PM edit delete reply
Tiffany was inwardly considering hitting him with her hammer but decided against it as he was going to help her with getting to her brother.

I put in an 'or'. That's what you get for reading to quickly.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 1:11 PM edit delete reply
I was making a joke; because you specified the outcome of the love potion but not of the clothing incident, it appears (grammatically) that you meant that both would lead to the same thing. I understand what you were saying.

But seriously, if all it take is a topless scene to make her confused and inspire romantic conflict, then I'm all for it. My approach was going to be more subtle- he begins to develop protective feelings for her (uncharacteristically saving her from death or damage, or something). He doesn't realize it's happening, but as it develops and tehy three of them begin to come to erms with their feelings, he and Rolf begin to compete for her. Eventually, whoever she goes with becomes the love interest, while the other takes the role of a caring big brother figure (which will then take an interesting turn when they meet her REAL big brother).
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 1:24 PM edit delete reply
Errrrr......*backs up.* For some reason, I keep thinking, 'nice boat ending.'
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 1:27 PM edit delete reply
I have no idea what that's supposed to mean.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 1:29 PM edit delete reply
Look up School Days on Tv Troupes.
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 1:43 PM edit delete reply
Yeah. Love triangle + psychopath = someone's getting their head cut off.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 1:46 PM edit delete reply
So, you're saying Tiffany would go insane and try to kill one or both of us?

I only ask because Rolf and Horizon are both guys, and as guys we lack the serial irrationality that would lead us to kill each other (or is it her that would get killed? I'm not really following how that went) over her, ESPECIALLY if we've been working together for the past few weeks, or however long it would hypothetically take to reach that point. It's not worth it- plus, the "protective" and "caring" details of their personality would counteract any hostile intent.

Edit: I feel like you guys aren't grasping the nuances of Horizon's personality. Remember "on my team, I won't kill you"?
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 1:55 PM edit delete reply
Oh yeah, I tend to forget about that.... but the Gm might read these posts and get ideas.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 2:01 PM edit delete reply
So who are we waiting on here?
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 2:07 PM edit delete reply
The Gm and maybe Skitter.

Me : *hugs Skitter*
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 2:06 PM edit delete reply
Well, in the School Days anime, there was one guy and two girls. He was having sex with both of them and trying to keep it a secret. Girl #1 finds out, stabs guy to death, chops off his head, shows it to Girl #2, kills Girl#2, then the ending has Girl#1 cradling his head on a boat.

I think her main concern is that you might go crazy in a "if I can't have her" scenario. However, from what I gather, if Horizon, messed up as he is, sees that she truly cares for Rolf, and Rolf responds in kind without bad intentions, he would be willing to "bow out gracefully" as opposed to "murdering the hypotenuse".

Edit: We're just waiting for Zarhon at this point, I believe. You'll find out about the flowers and the trapdoor, and my group will find out who's around the bend, with Skitter hopefully appearing right behind him.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 2:14 PM edit delete reply
Sounds about right^. The only scenario I can see that happening would be Horizon and Tiffany were engaged or something (unlikely, for now), and she cheats on him with Rolf- constituting betrayal. Maybe. Even then, don't count on any actual murdering. Probably just a fight.

And I honestly don't even care about the flowers. Let's just goooooooooo.
Zarhon 17th Jul 2012, 2:17 PM edit delete reply
Tiffany & Horizon

You open the trapdoor and enter the wine cellar. Unsurprisingly, the place is full of wine kegs of varying size, including gargantuant storage kegs, barrel-sized kegs, and small, portable kegs. There are also a number of chalices and several religious items scattered around, most likely for blessing the wine. The whole area is completely lightless, apart from the light emanating from the trap door, as well as a faint light coming from a staircase across the room, leading upwards.

Rolf & Skitter

Sktter -> 10

Skitter teleports behind the bend as quickly as he can, but all he manages to catch is the sound of a door closing, somewhere nearby. He takes note of the hallway:
- There are two more rooms on the left side of it
- Three rooms to the right side
- One of the right rooms is bolted and nailed shut
- A door on the left side is broken and shattered to pieces.
- There is a regal-looking door on the end of the hallway, with a small stained glass window on it.
- On one of the walls is a hanging wooden board, with various papers nailed or glued to it.

Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 2:25 PM edit delete reply
See, that's why I wanted to go down the cellar. I can't keep track of that without a map. Check the board, maybe we'll get some sidequests off of it.

"Search the room." he directs Tiffany, quietly, to one side, and goes to work looking for any trace of the cultists along the other, as well as an entrance to the catacombs. He makes sure to grab one of the nicer chalices as he goes.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 2:37 PM edit delete reply
Tiffany started searching, silently hoping that a rat would bite Horizon. she took special care around the kegs.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 2:58 PM edit delete reply
How's a rat supposed to bite me? Skitter's upstairs.
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 2:45 PM edit delete reply
Rolf turned around the bend after hearing Skitter appear and the door close. "There's a story behind this scene." he thought. He glanced over at the bolted door. Had the cultists rounded up the clerics and locked them up? Or was it the other way around? And what had happened to the shattered door on the left?

He looked at Skitter. "Whoever was here probably ran into one of these rooms and isn't going anywhere. I'm going to look at the message board to see if it has some clues, or maybe a map of this place. Could you listen closely at the bolted door so we have a better idea of whether to open it or leave it shut, please?" he asked as he walked past Skitter to the message board.
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 3:07 PM edit delete reply
"I can do better than that." says Skitter with a smile as he teleports to the other side of the bolted door.

(@Bronymous: Dangit Skitter isn't a rat! And you think I'm not having the same troubles?)

Edit: Also, what are you people talking about. There is no such thing as this "School Days". No. No. Stop. Don't. Just stop. No. Such. Thing. Ok?

And why would you need clothes/love potions (clothes potions?) to make Skitter fall in love with Tiff? It was clearly love at first sight. How did you guys not pick up on that?

Edit 2: And since I know you guys are dying to see it. Birds & the Bees, Skitter version:

Tiffany: Hey, Skitter. I have these funny feelings about -insert protaganist here-. Is this normal?
Skitter: Like you want to punch them?
Tiffany: Uh. Not all of the time. That wasn't the feeling I meant. I think it might But, I don't know what happens from there.
Skitter: Oh. Wait, what? How do you not know about mating? Where babies come from? *stares*
Tiffany: *blushes*
Skitter: Uh.... I know humans are a little...uh, nevermind. It doesn't have anything to do with Pelor and Melora getting drunk ok? That's just one of those weird tales.
But, seriously, you've never seen two people insert their thing into the other thing?
Tiffany: What? *totally confused* Insert what? Pelor? Into what? Melora?
Skitter: *gives her a blank look* Yes. Insert Pelor into Melora. *shakes his head and walks off*

Ta da!
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 3:12 PM edit delete reply
Lol dumb kobold. Gon get wrecked.

Am I the only one on this site who doesn't watch anime?
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 3:22 PM edit delete reply

Sorry, that was a lie. =)
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 3:12 PM edit delete reply
Oh, boy. I really hope what's on the other side of that door is friendly. I don't know which would be worse: a bunch of jittery clerics with Turn Undead spells at the ready, or more of those blood monsters.

edit: Alright, Ramsus, alright. I'll just put it in the "Does not exist" box alongside the Star Wars prequels, the Highlander sequels, and the pumpkins from Jailbreak (MS Paint Adventures).
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 3:25 PM edit delete reply
And the supposed Tsukihime anime.

(Though, I personally like the prequels ok. More than most other movies. Just less than the originals.)
Edit: And Miguel. (This is a friend of a friend who was talked about often but I never met, so for years I insisted he didn't exist. Then I met him. And maintained my position anyway since it was already fact.)
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 3:33 PM edit delete reply
"Insert the thing into the other thing."

Can't get much more... something... than that. Well done.

I like all the Star Wars movies. What they lack in whatever it is people dislike them for, they make up for in decent effects.

One thing that belongs in the Does Not Exist folder: Pokemon Gen 3-5.

Edit: And Rarity's parents.
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 3:37 PM edit delete reply
Here's the accumulation of everything in the "Does not exist" box.
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 3:38 PM edit delete reply
Well, Skitter wouldn't know if humans have the same equipment. He is pretty sure humans don't lay eggs though.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 4:17 PM edit delete reply
Well then while he's physical attraction tot Tiffany, he can ask her how babies are made, and we can have a big old-fashioned hilariously-awkward-fest.

Meanwhile, back in the temple...
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 4:27 PM edit delete reply
There are pokemon from generation 3-5 that I like and Ghetis from Pokemon: Black and White is smart about his plan...even if it makes you want to throw him to the sand gaters, electric zebras, and the smug leaf snakes. Seriously, he a jerk.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 4:40 PM edit delete reply
I'm ok with them continuing the series, but they ran out of ideas for new pokemon. All of the new ones are tired revamps of older models, and they all follow the same theme of evolution- small, round and squishy turns into big, spiky and scary- hell the last three Fire-type starters all evolved into Fire/Fighting-type. And the Legendaries are a joke- just a bunch of uber-powered monsters designed to trump last season's uber-powered monsters. Plus, there are like, 30 of them now, so what about them is so legendary anymore.

Honestly, the only reason I accept Gen 2 is because Gen 1 originally included around 200 pokemon, but got cut down, and those that didn't make it showed up in Gen 2 (that's why Ho-oh appeared in the very first episode), and trying to separate those "originals" form the still fairly imaginative second gen is pointless.
Zarhon 17th Jul 2012, 4:48 PM edit delete reply
This chat both amuses and disturbs me greatly. Off to sleep. No time for proper update, so here's an alt-text!

Skitter enters the room. The room is dark, but his darkvision allows his eyes to see and relay a single image to his brain. You could scarecly describe the horror of what came next.

Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 4:51 PM edit delete reply
Well, today's run was certainly productive.

Edit: And now Skitter knows how babies are made.
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 5:10 PM edit delete reply
Skitter's pony arrived early! (The real horror is the question of why there is a pony in a locked room inside a temple.)

Bronymous, how can you be against more eevee types? (For me eevee is basically the only important thing about pokemon.)

Btw, just to be clear, I was kidding about Skitter and Tiff. Though I suppose you never know with all the Half-X's out there. (That in fact is actually one of my minor issues with D&D. More than half the races are Humans + X thing and not something original. For this reason Thri-Kreen is one of my favorite races.)

Edit: Wait what. Why does meeting Pinkie Pie in a dark room mean....oh no. "Surprise Party" *shudders*.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 5:23 PM edit delete reply
I don't think anyone thought you were serious about SkitTiff.

And I already have a hard enough time choosing between the three originals, mostly because there is only one evee per game and I would like to have damn near every pokemon in the game- eevee makes that impossible on its own.
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 5:16 PM edit delete reply
Ah, man. I've got work tomorrow too. That's 8ish hours before I can respond to whatever was in that room. (Skitter, I suggest you teleport out as soon as you can see what's in there and before it can see you.)

Alt-script time!
As Rolf looked over the message board, he heard a large explosion behind him. He turned to see the bolted door had been burst outwards, with confetti falling to the ground. Rolf quickly ran over and looked into the room. There were festive decorations along the walls, including a poster of a pony with a detachable tail. There were strange bags that seemed to be suspended in air and held down by strings tied to a chair. In the center of the room was a table holding a cake with small candles sticking out of it. As Rolf approached, he saw that someone had written a kind of message into the frosting.

"Happy Going-Away Party, Skitter!"

Suddenly, a high-pitched laugh seemed to emanate from the walls, which then slowly faded away to silence.

Bad End.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 5:29 PM edit delete reply
Ummm, aren't Vampires sterile?
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 5:37 PM edit delete reply
1) Skitter is a Dhampyr which is basically half-vampire. Like for example, Blade. As far as I know he's not sterile.

2) I don't see how being sterile would prevent you from knowing how procreation works or prevent love or the making of love.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 5:47 PM edit delete reply
@Ramsus : ohhh/ Well my half-vampire character (Who may or may not show up) is sterile.

@Lynt : Errr, well, I liked the games because I loved to come up with back stories for my pokemon and picture different universe like one where the trainer fought along side the pokemon.
The game that got me really interested in Pokemon was Crystal. The thing is, they ran out of ideas for the first game but still made awesome pokemon. For a lot of their pokemon, they draw inspiration from real life animals, places, people, anime, and even urban legends/religion.
It also bought up questions and creepy stories. For example, there's one ghost type pokemon in gen 5. It carries around it's human face turned into a mask. It evolves into a casket that eats people. Pokemon is a dark and mature series if you strip away the kiddy layers they put on top. Also, Skarmory's feathers were used for swords. There has been war. You're just playing a kid that's relatively unaware of those problems.
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 5:34 PM edit delete reply
One thing I don't like about the Pokemon series is that the core premise, "Gotta Catch Em All!", is a lie. You essentially need to have both versions and use one as the "sacrifice" version, allowing it to be reset to gain the all 3 starters and all the Eevee's. My sister once had the original Blue Version. She managed to get all 150, trading with my cousin and I don't know who else. And what did she get for it?

An onscreen "certificate" from the in-game development team in Celadon City.

The "Event-Only" Pokemon are just adding insult to injury.
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 5:40 PM edit delete reply
Yeah, I kinda agree. On the other hand, they want to make money and it's not anywhere near as sleazy as dlc tends to be.

As for multiple eevee....just get a ditto or something else your eevee can breed with. Hatch eggs, apply stones/appropriate conditions, and you now have a full eevee type team. Admittedly this does take kinda a while but, I've never played a Pokemon game where I had the team I wanted to play with before halfway through anyway.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 5:50 PM edit delete reply
Unless you're playing gen 1 where there is no breeding.

That tagline is an obvious lie though. Look at Ash Ketchum. He's been at it for ten years, five or six regions, and two dozen "friends", and he still only has like 17 pokemon at any one time (even though they try to say that everything that's happened since episode 1 ihas happened in under a year. ONE YEAR. Bullshit). He really sucks at this. Gary is a much better role model, he catches a LOT of pokemon in the first season alone.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 5:51 PM edit delete reply
Yeah, Ask Ketchum sucks.
Red however, is freaking awesome. The manga is darker as is has zombie pokemon.
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 6:06 PM edit delete reply
One year? How is that even possible? Even if you ignored them declaring travel times, any time day turned to night or vice versa, etc. Hasn't there still been more episodes than there are days in a year by this point?

Then again....Celebi could just cry and break the laws of the universe again. *shrug*
(Did you guys see that movie? Celebi is like one of those broken 3.5 wizards who manage to contingent spell every possible eventuality. Plus at will time travel.)
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 6:08 PM edit delete reply
Eh, Celebi falls under my least favorite, followed closely by Palkia.

My top five favorites :
1. Darkrai
2. Groudon
3. Resharim
4. Lugia
5. Arceus

Edit : The rules of their universe could be completely different from ours so...oh wait, no....there was a short I remember where Ash was celebrating the anniversary of getting Pikachu.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 6:28 PM edit delete reply
And yet, official canon says less than a year.

well, since we're done with Scary, Timid, Short, and Rolf for right now- Post ideal teams. Try to avoid broken-ass legendaries.

6-One of the following, depending on the situation: Kadabra, Gyarados, Pidgeot, or my Starter.

BTW, those are my top five favorite, as well.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 6:35 PM edit delete reply
My team
1 A starter. (Most likely Sceptile, Charizard, or Samourott.)
2 Houndoom, Quagsire, or Whismicott (Depends on my starter.)
3 Houndoom, Quagsire, or Whismicott (Depends on my starter.)
4 Darkrai
5 Skarmory
6 Froslass
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 6:38 PM edit delete reply
1) Espeon
2) Umbreon
3) Leafeon (or as I would have it called, Floreon)
4) Vaporeon
5) Glaceon (two words: Dragon type.)
6) Flareon

I don't really like how jolteon looks compared to the others and the only thing it'd cover that isn't already is Flying types and you know what? Blasting them with psychic attacks works most of the time anyway.

It also helps that outside of legendaries, eevee types have some of the best stat spreads around.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 7:00 PM edit delete reply
Ice type kills birds. And I'm betting they didn't call it Floreon (good name, btw) because it's too similar to Flareon. That, and they have a very limited grasp of the English Language.

I still need someone to explain to me what "Umbr" is supposed to allude to.
Calypso 17th Jul 2012, 8:08 PM edit delete reply
Umbra is latin for shadow, it is part of the names of three parts of a shadow.
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 9:00 PM edit delete reply
I totally forgot about that.

The naming thing doesn't really apply as the names are decided by their branches in whatever region. In fact some of the names are wildly different based on the region. I don't just mean how they sound from one language to the other, if you translate a lot of the japanese names to english they'd be totally different. So, my thinking on Leafeon is that it suffered from typical corporate stupidity.
Stairc 18th Jul 2012, 11:01 AM edit delete reply
Fun Fact: I've also developed a Pokemon pen and paper system.
LoganAura 18th Jul 2012, 12:16 PM edit delete reply
Gimmegimmegimmegimmegimmegimmegimmegimmegimme ^u^
Destrustor 18th Jul 2012, 3:34 PM edit delete reply
My best ever Gen2 team:
1: Typhlosion (with groud-type TMs)
2: Quagsire (with ice-type TMs)
3: Ampharos (with iron tail)
4: any flying-type (just to have fly)
Nothing else.
Basically ready for anything and all the exp a normal team of six would obtain gets split in four instead. Gets really high-level really fast.
Crimson Doom 18th Jul 2012, 7:39 AM edit delete reply
Crimson Doom
1. Ludicolo (great type coverage and few weaknesses, decent stats)
2. Weavile (have you seen the speed and attack on that thing? Plus, dragon-killer.)
3. Garchomp (I don't think I need to say anything about why I want this one.)
4. Gallade (because he rocks. Swords Dance, Psycho Cut, Leaf Blade, Drain Punch = death.)
5. Rotom (Because it's a really cool Pokemon. Probably Fan Forme because Electric/Flying is one of the best type combos ever.)
6. Togekiss (Air Slash + Serene Grace = 60% flinch chance. Yes please!)
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 6:29 PM edit delete reply
Heh, broken wizards? You mean those guys who can just cast spells without any real limitations? I, uh, certainly wouldn't do anything like that.

Yeah, the context of our game makes the D&D concept of "charges" kind of unfeasible (not resting 8 hours after every battle, etc.). Still, I try to keep to the list I set before.

But back on topic. Yeah, considering the first Pokemon movie essentially retconned itself, I think the movies can be as fanfictiony as they want, as long as they don't pretend they have any influence over the plot.

Also, I read some of the manga, and it's definitely more badass than the anime.

edit: So "Rolf" is an adjective now?
edit2: Have any of you heard of the Nuzlocke challenge comics? They can be quite fun to read.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 6:36 PM edit delete reply
I love the Nuzlocke comics. I've attempted to do a play though of a game with those rules....I lost half of my team to one gym.
Demonu 17th Jul 2012, 6:41 PM edit delete reply
Never give up
Never forget
Grind like hell

I found that if you took the time for it and got your team up to 3 to 5 levels above the gym, you can beat them easier. And if you take the Fire starter pokémon (especially in gen3 and further), you've already got 3 gyms beat.

Of course, type match-ups take a backseat due to the restricting rules regarding catching so you have to go brute force.
(mostly to avoid criticial kills)
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 6:39 PM edit delete reply
It was a play on the Family Guy joke: Fat, Horny, Black, and Joe.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 6:43 PM edit delete reply
Well now that "play on words" is most known for crying kids and dead pokemon. Also, hilarious shipping.
It did help people learn to appreciate all pokemon as they only had a limited amount to go with.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 6:53 PM edit delete reply
My joke? what are you talking about?
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 6:58 PM edit delete reply
Edited. Also, I did publish one nuzlocke. I lost my starter when I needed it most and to pokemon I loved the most died.
Needless to say, she was a wreak for a little while before slowly getting over it.
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 7:01 PM edit delete reply
I still don't know what you're talking about.
Kris_The_Guest 17th Jul 2012, 7:02 PM edit delete reply
Never mind. *sweat drop*
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 8:09 PM edit delete reply
Lyntermas 17th Jul 2012, 8:29 PM edit delete reply
...So, how about that Zilean guy, eh? I'm starting to wonder if his flair for the dramatic will cause him to make...less than sound decisions. I think it's safe to say that Rolf changing into a skeleton wasn't a real part of his plans, otherwise he wouldn't have just let him walk away like that.
Ramsus 17th Jul 2012, 8:57 PM edit delete reply
What are you talking about? It totally was. He made your skeleton (an object) his phylactery of course. =P

@Zarhon: As AJ says, if you hadn't thought of it before you can't use it. =)
Bronymous 17th Jul 2012, 9:04 PM edit delete reply
I will admit, it seems a bit too much of a coincidence. It looked like he was expecting you to be there. I hope he does make some mistakes because of his dramatic flair- it'll make it sound like I knew what I was talking about back there, instead of just blowing hot air trying to distract him.
Lyntermas 18th Jul 2012, 7:22 AM edit delete reply
Well, he didn't refer to me by name (how could he, I'm the last minute replacement). Perhaps he knew about the spell that would be cast on the actor, but it seems he mainly "helped" me for the lolz since I totally messed up on stage...due to my form. Yeah. The dice had nothing to do with it.

*looks around* Um, Zarhon, I'm leaving in about 30 minutes. Could you post an update please?
Zarhon 18th Jul 2012, 7:42 AM edit delete reply

Skitter teleports into the room. The room is understandably dark, though there is a little light coming from under the door, making it sufficient to see the room's features with your darkvision. The room contains a bed, a writer's table and chair, a clothes closet and a chest. All of the furniture is covered in dust. On the table are a bunch of old books, notebooks and the dried/rotten out remains of ink and quills. There is also a orb inside a makeshift brazier on the table, with several cracks in it. It appears to have something written or carved on it, but you can't tell what from the darkness.


Lore (Religion) -> 12 - 3 = 9

You check the message board. Most of the messages appear to be notifications of various duties to be performed, prayer scripts, reminders and other such stuff. You also notice a trio of important looking papers, that look like they've been posted for quite a while. They appear to be written in a pseudo-religious script that seems familiar: You've probably had to study it as part of your language education. Sadly, you can't remember anything relevant: The professor of that class had particularly "distracting" attire. Of the stuff you can read, you find two rather interesting notes:



Horizon & Tiffany

17 (H)
9 + 8 = 17 (T)

Tiffany checks the room. Doing so, she notes that there are quite a few dead animals around, with no clear cause as to what killed them. You also note that one corner of the cellar appears to be well traveled: There isn't much dust at it, and the keg near it seems to have been used often, as evidenced by the wine-colored floor under it.
Lyntermas 18th Jul 2012, 7:53 AM edit delete reply
Rolf decide to take the three religious looking papers with him. He couldn't read them, but he remembered that Tiffany had some cleric training. Perhaps she could decipher them.

He made a note that if they were going up into the attic, they'd have to watch for the steps. He looked at the broken door; it must have been broken before they got here, but what had happened?

Rolf went over to the bolted door and knocked. "Skitter, are you in there? Brother Silas, do not be alarmed. There has been an undead attack on the city, and we are currently investigating."

(If Skitter comes out and says there's nobody in there, Rolf will ask him to go back in and look for secret passages. If he decides to bring the orb out, roll for Arcana. See you all later).
Ramsus 18th Jul 2012, 9:41 AM edit delete reply
"Just me in here." says Skitter through the door. He takes the orb and looks through the books and notebooks for anything interesting or possibly valuable. He hands them over to Rolf. Then he goes back in and looks for secret passages like Rolf asked.

(Btw Zarhon, darkvision allows you to see in total darkness. Low-light vision is the one where you need a bit of light.)
Kris_The_Guest 18th Jul 2012, 11:00 AM edit delete reply
"Hey, Horizon! Over here!" Tiffany called out, trying to grab his attention.
Bronymous 18th Jul 2012, 11:56 AM edit delete reply
Horizon, having found nothing of interest, makes his way over to Tiffany. Upon examining the wine stains on the floor, he looks back at her. "Ok," he began slowly, "This could be a clue. I guess." He looks around a bit more, before he focuses on the wine keg itself. "All this really tells us is someone was a bit sloppy retrieving some wine. Not a huge help, unless..." He then pulls out his reappropriated chalice, and fills it up with wine. He examines it for a moment, noting color and viscosity, and then holds it out to her. "Here, taste this."

Kris_The_Guest 18th Jul 2012, 12:38 PM edit delete reply
"Ummm, what if it's poisoned?" She asked. "Looked at the rats. They're all dead and I don't think they were stabbed to death."
Zarhon 18th Jul 2012, 12:59 PM edit delete reply
Oh Horizon. Such a romantic / creepy opportunist.


Religion -> 9 - 8 = 1

Most of these books seem to be religious texts and daily activity lists, with exceptions of two, which are handwritten. They're written in some weird hockey pokey lettering though. You can't even tell which way you're supposed to read it.

Looting -> Nat 20 + 8

You loot all the things. ALL OF THEM. You manage to find the following items of worth:
- Copper doorknob (From door).
- Silver chest lining (Stripped from chest).
- Silver padlock (Chest).
- Silver padlock key (Chest).
- Copper handles (Table drawers).
- The orb, as well as it's makeshift iron holder (Table).
- Golden wine Chalice (Chest).
- A sack of gold (Chest).
- An ancient bottle of wine, still corked (Chest).
- Silken yellow robes (Closet).
- A strange looking cloak, human-sized, hidden within a secret compartment of the cupboard.
- A dusty, but very pretty rug
- Superbly aged cheese from a mousetrap (Exquisite!)
- Silver cross necklace (Under pillow)


Skitter returns from the room with a gigantic grin on his face. He hands you some dusty old books, a broken looking orb, and a cloak (it's too big for him to wear).

Arcana -> 6 + 8 = 14

As soon as you touch the orb, a magical discharge is released into your hand and through your body. As it does so, the orb's cracks widen, causing the orb to shatter to pieces. It's shattered pieces quickly crumble to dust afterwards (Skitter quickly scoops up the dust into a bag. "Waste not, want not!"). Surprisingly, you are unharmed and unchanged by the discharge. Although you do feel a chill down your spine and slight tingling from the spell rushing through you.

Inspecting the cloak reveals some magical qualities to it, notably of transmutation, and others you can't discern properly. As for it's appearance, it looks like a regular brown cured leather cloak, but with 5 thin strips on it's ends.
Kris_The_Guest 18th Jul 2012, 1:02 PM edit delete reply
Well, at least Skitter didn't steal the nails from the floor boards...if there were floor boards.
Bronymous 18th Jul 2012, 1:13 PM edit delete reply
Romantic nothing. And I swear to god he's not a rapist, not even a little bit. lol.

"Ugh, fine then, I'll do the remarkably dangerous thing, again." He removes his helmet, and brings the chalice to his mouth. He hesitates, smelling it, hoping to better detect if it's poisoned or not (and to give Tiffany a chance to protest). He gives her a sideways glance. "Child."

Perception, or better yet, Alchemical Lore, on the "wine". If no result, and no protest, then he sips it and tries again (without swallowing).
Kris_The_Guest 18th Jul 2012, 1:17 PM edit delete reply
Tiffany flinched slightly. "Well, you're more experienced than me..." She muttered, meaning to say that he might know more about poisons.
Zarhon 18th Jul 2012, 1:48 PM edit delete reply

8 + 8 = 16

You sniff the wine carefully. The nose displays lively red cheery and redcurrant fruits with a sappy slightly herbaceous hint.

You then taste it. On the dry, well balanced palate the wine has gentle cranberry and redcurrant flavours, subtle oak in the background. Nice powdery tannins, medium length. Conclusion - a well made fruit driven Pinot.



Kris_The_Guest 18th Jul 2012, 1:55 PM edit delete reply
Me & Tiffany : I don't get it.
Ramsus 18th Jul 2012, 1:50 PM edit delete reply
Lol, and once again Horizon is handling the jobs best left to Skitter. Also, stealing the doornob was priceless. So, any secret passages?
Edit: rofl, that pic.
Bronymous 18th Jul 2012, 2:03 PM edit delete reply
Lolwut? Well played, DM.

Horizon briefly toys with idea of putting on a show of choking and sputtering, as if the wine was poison. Ultimately, he decides against it. "Hm. I feel like ceremonial wine shouldn't be this good. Nice quality, probably a bit more luxurious then the clerics would want people to know. Oh well." He downs the rest of the chalice, and replaces it in one of his pouches. "Shall we?" He motions to the stairs. "I don't think we're going to find anything else down here."

Edit: @Kris, its because I'm so god-damned impressive, she can't help it.
Ramsus 18th Jul 2012, 2:11 PM edit delete reply
Hey, watch the language, this is a kids show. =P
Bronymous 18th Jul 2012, 2:27 PM edit delete reply
Yeah, because that's the worst language I've posted on here.
Kris_The_Guest 18th Jul 2012, 2:22 PM edit delete reply
"Sure." Tiffany started walking toward the stairs.
Zarhon 18th Jul 2012, 2:54 PM edit delete reply
H & T

You head up the stairs. You soon find that the stairwell ends in a short hallway, whilst the staircase splits into two additional staircases: One leading upwards, and another leading downwards. The hall itself is rather featureless, apart from a big tapestry and a door at the end of the hall, with a stained window on it.

8 + 8 = 16 (H)
7 (T)

Horizon notices a trail of blood. It leads from somewhere near the middle of the hallway slightly pooled, and heads towards the upwards steps.
Ramsus 18th Jul 2012, 3:10 PM edit delete reply
So, any secret passages? Y/N?
Zarhon 18th Jul 2012, 3:15 PM edit delete reply
No, I'd mention it if there were.
Bronymous 18th Jul 2012, 3:13 PM edit delete reply
Well the clues point up, so...

Horizon goes to open the door, but pauses and examines the tapestry along the wall. As he does so, he points out the blood to Tiffany. "Trail goes up, but we search the attic last, so let's find the others before we try that." He continues to look at the tapestry, both taking in the image on it, and searching for anything that could be important for the task at hand.
Kris_The_Guest 18th Jul 2012, 3:55 PM edit delete reply
"So we don't have to worry about being ambushed up there?" Tiffany asked.

DERPYYYYY! *flails at the limited Edition Derpy while crying.*
Zarhon 18th Jul 2012, 3:57 PM edit delete reply
The tapestry depicts a saintly figure, falling in battle along with a lich tyrant. The saintly figure is surrounded by a band of his hero companions, who are mourning him, as well as a large lion, licking his hand.

Perception -> 9+8=17

Poking a bit at the tapestry, you discover that it is concealing a rather large door.
Bronymous 18th Jul 2012, 4:05 PM edit delete reply
"I doubt they think we're still alive, between the paltry cultists, zombies, mass of horror, and the tent burning down. However," Horizon pulls the tapestry away from the door. "I wonder what could be in here." And with that, he attempts to open it.

You know the drill, if it's locked, try and kick it in (though I imagine its rather heavy. May need Tiffany's head for this one.)
Ramsus 18th Jul 2012, 4:17 PM edit delete reply
Skitter opens the nearest door and looks around.

Edit: Zarhon, you might want to avoid "you". I almost thought that was in response to Skitter.
Zarhon 18th Jul 2012, 4:18 PM edit delete reply
You kick at the door. It's pretty strong and reinforced (as well as locked), just you kicking it won't nearly be enough. As you do so, you hear something on the other side.
Kris_The_Guest 18th Jul 2012, 4:22 PM edit delete reply
"What was that?" Tiffany asked, getting close to the door.
Bronymous 18th Jul 2012, 5:05 PM edit delete reply
"Don't know. Can you open it?"
Kris_The_Guest 18th Jul 2012, 5:42 PM edit delete reply
"I'll try." Tiffany tried to pull the door open.

If it doesn't open, then it's hammer time.
Lyntermas 18th Jul 2012, 5:55 PM edit delete reply
Rolf stared at Skitter as he went over checking the doors. His pockets were practically bulging with loot. A lot of loot. And judging from the glimmer of what appeared to be a golden chalice sticking out of his pocket, a lot of VALUABLE loot. "You know I'm going to have Knife-Guy make you show us what you found, right? So you better pick which items you want to stick deepest in your pockets."

He thought about the items retrieved from the room. He was sure that Brother Silas would have a secret passage out of the room to steal more wine, but if Skitter hadn't found any, how was he not in there? He looked at the books, and stuffed them in his pouch for Tiffany to translate later. He thought of the orb, and felt slightly unnerved that there was an unknown spell coursing through him. Finally, he looked at the robe. Perhaps one of the books would describe what would happen if he put it on. As of right now, he would hold on to it.

He decided to follow Skitter's lead, and opened another one of the doors. (Not Sister Ivy's, the bolted room or the one Skitter is currently opening).
Ramsus 18th Jul 2012, 6:21 PM edit delete reply
(The bolted one is the one Skitter just came from and he never actually unbolted the door.)

Skitter looked back at Rolf and said, "Why would I hide what I find from you guys? I don't know nothin about the above world so I'm sticking with yous long as I can. I wants to share so you guys get better magic mojo and shinies so you can no die which helps me no die. These clerics on the other hand are getting more Skitter than they're likely to pay for. You know holy men, only talk talk talk about give is good when it's you, not them, so anythings I find is probably just going to make whatever pay they hand out actual close to right. 'sides Skitter and Rolf and Tiff and Knife guy can only carry so much and there is whole temple. They probably never miss most of stuff we take anyhows."

Skitter looks at the broken door. "Maybe they not ever notice."
Lyntermas 18th Jul 2012, 6:35 PM edit delete reply
Rolf looked startled. "I...I see. Sorry for doubting you, I just sometimes tend to assume the worst of others. That's...unfair to you, and I'll try to avoid it in the future." He paused for a moment, looked a bit hesitant, then decided to barrel on through. "So what is your view of things, anyway? I've heard Knife-Guy's spiel, and so we all know where he stands. And since I'm apparently a "self-righteous fool", I think it would be best if I know your perspective on things. I don't know if I'm willing to concede on ba..the bab...THAT subject, but I'd like to know your baseline so we could find some kind of equilibrium going forward."
Ramsus 18th Jul 2012, 7:18 PM edit delete reply
"You know...about that thing. I'm not going to do it while part of a society that doesn't. I'm not suicidal. It's be like for you if you showed up in a place where eating chicken is bad. Doesn't matter how much you like chicken, you probably still wouldn't do it. And really it's no worse than a lot of things your society finds acceptable on a day to day basis., we don't eat our own. Though, ours are eggs and lots of stuff eats eggs. Even ours. For that matter, humans do eat our eggs. So really, it's only fair."

He'd actually had that response pretty much prepared, having been given warning it was a future topic of discussion and had spent the time thinking about his response to the main part of the question Rolf had asked. "Well, I'm done ruling over dummies like Kobolds but, I was raised to do so. So, what I want is to get a lot of money and build a reputation and set up my own kingdom or something somewhere. As for good and bad stuff... well I'm ok with lots of things you probably say are bad but, really lots of humans do and you even would do if you had to. And maybe I'm ok doing some bad stuff you aren't. But, I'm not really against people doing good stuff. I just don't expect it or believe it without a real good reason.

Also, I think Knife Guy is flippin nuts. I can understand if it's going to get you somewhere or if they did something to you to deserve it but...he said he didn't even care about this town. So he just did it...because?

Tiff seems nice though, yes? Speaking of her and her werewolf brother, I found this silver thing. I think I'm going to wear it, just in case." Having said that, Skitter puts the silver cross around his forearm. He pre-empts Rolf asking about that, explaining, "It's not actually my holy symbol. I'm not going to wear it around my neck."
Lyntermas 18th Jul 2012, 7:39 PM edit delete reply
Rolf internalized what Skitter had said. He hadn't considered how humans hunted kobold eggs as delicacies. Strictly speaking, there was probably bad blood on both sides of that equation. But Skitter seemed...reasonable enough. No worse than some of his Thieves' Guild friends. Considering he had come with them this far without payment in advance