Friendship is Dragons
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I added a love spring from the xanth books into my campaign. first thing my players ask is if they know the location. they want to know what a crossbreed between a warforged and a humanoid plant would be. then the following conversation happened. "Can we vaporize the spring and have the mist go over a city? I think that causing a mist that would cause instant rape and sex to go over a city would be considered an evil act dont you?"
Story time! Talk about times when the party came together to pursue something silly or stupid.
My best actually come from our evil pony campaign, and involve only most of the party coming together; Wain amd Cinnamon were too sane to try cutting a laser-eyed painting out of a wall, then bite it to death when it bleeds and turns out to be a tormented demon's face. They were also too sane to try stealing a bear cub to raise as a devoted minion. Sense a pattern?
We did all pitch in to get Cinnamon out of paying for her hotel room, though. Being a plan made hastily by one or two PCs with the blind support of the rest, it ended with the town on Changeling alert and Princess Celestia herself politely demanding an explanation. Thank the random number god for Spectacular Successes at Persuasion... Experimenting on a rare flower went a little better, but THAT team effort left us with Weasel, our chaos-robot-thing-guy, tripping and/or in heat, with an evil flower whose thorns intoxicate with venom, plus a couple party members bleeding fron feeding the flower. Groupwide teamwork seems to go badly for us; splitting the party's yielded better results, with the exception of Shark getting arrested for pimping because everyone was going solo, for reasons, and thus unable to stop him.
We did all pitch in to get Cinnamon out of paying for her hotel room, though. Being a plan made hastily by one or two PCs with the blind support of the rest, it ended with the town on Changeling alert and Princess Celestia herself politely demanding an explanation. Thank the random number god for Spectacular Successes at Persuasion... Experimenting on a rare flower went a little better, but THAT team effort left us with Weasel, our chaos-robot-thing-guy, tripping and/or in heat, with an evil flower whose thorns intoxicate with venom, plus a couple party members bleeding fron feeding the flower. Groupwide teamwork seems to go badly for us; splitting the party's yielded better results, with the exception of Shark getting arrested for pimping because everyone was going solo, for reasons, and thus unable to stop him.
"Teen Titans" style superhero campaign.
Firefly: Lasers powers
Banshee: Sonic powers
Naboo: Shapeshifter
Telly: Telekinesis/teleporting powers
Sofia: Cyborg bruiser
The PCs (all teenaged supers) had downtime after a difficult mission defeating Billy Numerous at a Nascar event. They decided that they will use this down time... to go to Dennys!
Their vehicle (A Nissan Titan extended cab) was only to be used for missions. So sayeth their boss, military General Cabbage (they nicknamed him coleslaw). Because the titan HQ was at an army base, the team decides to take a Humvee.
So, five Titans cruisin in their Humvee in the evening trying to track down a Dennys. Along the way, they get passed by a bunch of drunks in a Ford F-350. This shall not go unpunished!!
They punch the Humvee, drive side-by-side with the F350 and demand the driver pull over. Instead they get the bird. So now we get a car chase sequence on a country road, drive through a farm, avoid splattering a cow, and the Titans are shooting at the drunks which instigates the drunks to pull out guns and shoot back!
Telly tries to teleport onto the F350, fails and lands into a pickup carrying chickens, which cause the chickens to panic and jump out of the truck and onto the F350, which blinds the driver so the truck runs off the road and flips in a ditch, which throws the passengers in the back bed onto the road in front of the Humvee. So the Humvee driver (Banshee) swerves and hits the hopper on the back of a tractor, causing the Humvee to flip through the air, over the cop on the motorcycle, and THROUGH a roadside Billboard that read "If you don't have Geico, don't hit this sign"
They didn't make it to Dennys that night.
Firefly: Lasers powers
Banshee: Sonic powers
Naboo: Shapeshifter
Telly: Telekinesis/teleporting powers
Sofia: Cyborg bruiser
The PCs (all teenaged supers) had downtime after a difficult mission defeating Billy Numerous at a Nascar event. They decided that they will use this down time... to go to Dennys!
Their vehicle (A Nissan Titan extended cab) was only to be used for missions. So sayeth their boss, military General Cabbage (they nicknamed him coleslaw). Because the titan HQ was at an army base, the team decides to take a Humvee.
So, five Titans cruisin in their Humvee in the evening trying to track down a Dennys. Along the way, they get passed by a bunch of drunks in a Ford F-350. This shall not go unpunished!!
They punch the Humvee, drive side-by-side with the F350 and demand the driver pull over. Instead they get the bird. So now we get a car chase sequence on a country road, drive through a farm, avoid splattering a cow, and the Titans are shooting at the drunks which instigates the drunks to pull out guns and shoot back!
Telly tries to teleport onto the F350, fails and lands into a pickup carrying chickens, which cause the chickens to panic and jump out of the truck and onto the F350, which blinds the driver so the truck runs off the road and flips in a ditch, which throws the passengers in the back bed onto the road in front of the Humvee. So the Humvee driver (Banshee) swerves and hits the hopper on the back of a tractor, causing the Humvee to flip through the air, over the cop on the motorcycle, and THROUGH a roadside Billboard that read "If you don't have Geico, don't hit this sign"
They didn't make it to Dennys that night.
Cleric, Paladin, Knight, Rogue, and Monk. The only real good guy is the Rogue (think assassins creed).
We were on ourm way to our favored pub (A bleeding chance), when we were approched by a mysterious black cloaked ranger. He offered every one of us a wish if we could bring something to his lord.
We were bored and a little light on cash (Evil paladin thinks <1000 gold is light), so accepted.
We had to venture out into the wild, conquer a temple of Bahamut (Great moment, not great choice), and find this ancient text in the temples catacombs.
When we returned to give his master the ancient text, he had us ask for our wish (Not an infinite wish or anything, just a mafia godfather wish), so we (in order as above) asked for a house, a demonic horse mount, a title, and a familiar fire lizard, the rogue wanted nothing.
Instead he asked to know what the ancient text was, and he got this response, "Well, good rogue, if you must know. This text is part of a holy book I have trying to restore for the last fifty years, and you have brought me the last page. Now I can finish my life long task and hope my ancestors are proud I have brought it full circle, they made it, distibuted it, and I have it. As for what it is, simply put like this, "Have you ever had something so great and powerful, that it had to be forgotten to timebecause of said reason?"
The rogue was panicked thinking it was some ancient evil spell or something. Nope turns out to be the recipe to some really good Spagetti. (Everyone else wasn't as good at keeping their cool)
We were on ourm way to our favored pub (A bleeding chance), when we were approched by a mysterious black cloaked ranger. He offered every one of us a wish if we could bring something to his lord.
We were bored and a little light on cash (Evil paladin thinks <1000 gold is light), so accepted.
We had to venture out into the wild, conquer a temple of Bahamut (Great moment, not great choice), and find this ancient text in the temples catacombs.
When we returned to give his master the ancient text, he had us ask for our wish (Not an infinite wish or anything, just a mafia godfather wish), so we (in order as above) asked for a house, a demonic horse mount, a title, and a familiar fire lizard, the rogue wanted nothing.
Instead he asked to know what the ancient text was, and he got this response, "Well, good rogue, if you must know. This text is part of a holy book I have trying to restore for the last fifty years, and you have brought me the last page. Now I can finish my life long task and hope my ancestors are proud I have brought it full circle, they made it, distibuted it, and I have it. As for what it is, simply put like this, "Have you ever had something so great and powerful, that it had to be forgotten to timebecause of said reason?"
The rogue was panicked thinking it was some ancient evil spell or something. Nope turns out to be the recipe to some really good Spagetti. (Everyone else wasn't as good at keeping their cool)
Ah, yes, epic quests for recipes. Reminds me of the time my party had just reached 20th level and successfully stopped the evil wizard/titan/demigod from staging a battle between two pantheons and using the ensuing chaos to become a pillar of reality, and we were looking for what to do next...and the chief of our home plane's pantheon had rewarded the group's frequently-drunken bard with the recipe for the most powerful alcoholic beverage in the cosmos.
Cue epic campaign that mostly involves us travelling to the most obscure and ridiculous corners of reality for the exotic ingredients required to brew a mixed drink. Just because the bard felt like it. And along the way, we discovered another group of eldritch beings questing the exact same ingredient list we were questing, and eventually learned they wanted to brew this ultimate alcohol and pour it into the center of the omniverse so as to be able to reshape all of existance to their liking.
"See, this is why a Cleric of [homebrew goddess of adventuring] accepts any quest, especially one crossing planar boundaries, even if it's to create a mixed drink. You never know what you'll end up accomplishing."
Cue epic campaign that mostly involves us travelling to the most obscure and ridiculous corners of reality for the exotic ingredients required to brew a mixed drink. Just because the bard felt like it. And along the way, we discovered another group of eldritch beings questing the exact same ingredient list we were questing, and eventually learned they wanted to brew this ultimate alcohol and pour it into the center of the omniverse so as to be able to reshape all of existance to their liking.
"See, this is why a Cleric of [homebrew goddess of adventuring] accepts any quest, especially one crossing planar boundaries, even if it's to create a mixed drink. You never know what you'll end up accomplishing."
Silly? Maybe. Stupid? Definitely.
I was GMing a Bunnies and Burrows (1st, not GURPS) campaign that involved 5 people: a Scout (Rogue), an Empath (Cleric-ish), a Fighter (…), a Storyteller (Bard), an Herbalist, and a Seer, which don’t have archetypes that I can think of. I’m sure they exist, but that’s not the point of the story.
When I was coming up with the campaign, I didn't want to jump on Richard Adams'(s) boat just yet, and my characters were low level, so I designed the first big challenge to be dealing with a bear that may or may not be threatening the warren. The first segment was actually discovering the bear and its cave.
How does one send low-level PC rabbits out into the world? Telling to them to forage, of course! I presented them with three options: The fields to the north, which were full of herbs for the herbalists of the warren, but no “fulfilling” roots or berries necessary to complete their assignment, the forest to the east, or a nearby farm to the southwest full of cabbages, carrots, and so forth. Also, the farm housed a farmer with a trained eye and rifle, but that’s neither here nor there.
I explained all of this to the players when I gave them their task. After a far too brief debate, they collectively decided to…
Go north?
What followed was a series of mishaps, from sleep herbs being consumed to a near drowning to fleeing from "elil". Battered and exhausted, they returned to the warren whereupon they realized that they had not, in fact, returned with any food.
I was GMing a Bunnies and Burrows (1st, not GURPS) campaign that involved 5 people: a Scout (Rogue), an Empath (Cleric-ish), a Fighter (…), a Storyteller (Bard), an Herbalist, and a Seer, which don’t have archetypes that I can think of. I’m sure they exist, but that’s not the point of the story.
When I was coming up with the campaign, I didn't want to jump on Richard Adams'(s) boat just yet, and my characters were low level, so I designed the first big challenge to be dealing with a bear that may or may not be threatening the warren. The first segment was actually discovering the bear and its cave.
How does one send low-level PC rabbits out into the world? Telling to them to forage, of course! I presented them with three options: The fields to the north, which were full of herbs for the herbalists of the warren, but no “fulfilling” roots or berries necessary to complete their assignment, the forest to the east, or a nearby farm to the southwest full of cabbages, carrots, and so forth. Also, the farm housed a farmer with a trained eye and rifle, but that’s neither here nor there.
I explained all of this to the players when I gave them their task. After a far too brief debate, they collectively decided to…
Go north?
What followed was a series of mishaps, from sleep herbs being consumed to a near drowning to fleeing from "elil". Battered and exhausted, they returned to the warren whereupon they realized that they had not, in fact, returned with any food.
There was a different Supers campaign (I didn't run this one) where the party had to go track down their missing unicorn (I was playing The Great and Powerful Trixie).
Not easy to do in Monte Carlo. Trixie was at a casino getting crazy amounts of attention. Lose everything at the blackjack table? Who cares! The house comps her more free chips (and booze) because the distraction is making everyone lose at the tables. No one cares! Unicorn!! :D
So yeah, the rest of the party spy on police radio bands and ask around the underworld until they find her at the casino. Annnd then instigate a riot as they attempt to remove a drunk Trixie by force. XD
Which gets mistaken for a ponynapping by the casino security and as an attack against a crime boss who got injured during the shuffle. Guns get drawn, police bust people down, Trixie is singing the dirty lyrics to Axel F... it was a mess. :D
All because the party had to have their unicorn on a leash.
Not easy to do in Monte Carlo. Trixie was at a casino getting crazy amounts of attention. Lose everything at the blackjack table? Who cares! The house comps her more free chips (and booze) because the distraction is making everyone lose at the tables. No one cares! Unicorn!! :D
So yeah, the rest of the party spy on police radio bands and ask around the underworld until they find her at the casino. Annnd then instigate a riot as they attempt to remove a drunk Trixie by force. XD
Which gets mistaken for a ponynapping by the casino security and as an attack against a crime boss who got injured during the shuffle. Guns get drawn, police bust people down, Trixie is singing the dirty lyrics to Axel F... it was a mess. :D
All because the party had to have their unicorn on a leash.
And it worked. We eventually got the couch out of the sewers and hid it in our base, a room at the inn that I'd rented the previous night. I just wish the campaign had gone long enough to find out what we would eventually do with the darn thing. XD
I must say, that is one of the best adventures for crazy stuff I've read in a very long time. XD
When it comes to stupid, unnecessary pursuits, it would be hard to beat this one group that I DM'd a game of Scion for:
The game was set in Las Vegas, and the party (scions of Thor, Artemis, and Susano'o respectively) had been tasked with finding out what had happened to several Aesir scions who had gone missing in the area. Their NPC guide had managed to figure out that they had met with two members of a white supremacist group before disappearing, one of whom was staying in the same hotel as the party. Rather than going up to the target's room, forcing open the door, and 'enhanced interrogating' him as I had come to expect from them, they began to develop an elaborate plan to knock out the power in the hotel in order to kidnap the guy and question him off of the premises (they were worried about getting caught by security). What followed was a session of reading up on the hotel's blueprints and fully planning out their kidnapping which they finally managed to pull off (successfully, to their credit)...only to realize that he wasn't in his room, having been kidnapped by another group of Scions while the PCs were planning. Many tears were shed that day.
The game was set in Las Vegas, and the party (scions of Thor, Artemis, and Susano'o respectively) had been tasked with finding out what had happened to several Aesir scions who had gone missing in the area. Their NPC guide had managed to figure out that they had met with two members of a white supremacist group before disappearing, one of whom was staying in the same hotel as the party. Rather than going up to the target's room, forcing open the door, and 'enhanced interrogating' him as I had come to expect from them, they began to develop an elaborate plan to knock out the power in the hotel in order to kidnap the guy and question him off of the premises (they were worried about getting caught by security). What followed was a session of reading up on the hotel's blueprints and fully planning out their kidnapping which they finally managed to pull off (successfully, to their credit)...only to realize that he wasn't in his room, having been kidnapped by another group of Scions while the PCs were planning. Many tears were shed that day.
Me and the guys from the Pony RPG were bored, so we decided to have our characters head to Ponyville. Cue the DM blinking and then grinning like a Cheshire cat on crack. What followed was Lowkey getting into a heated debate with Applejack on the subject of honesty vs. dishonesty, B.J. challenging Rainbow Dash to a race, Dusty having to help round up Fluttershy's chickens (now giant thanks to Discord), Silvertongue (new guy, Earth Pony Bard) singing a duet with pinkie, and Umamaru being nothing but the perfect gentleman to Rarity. This resulted in Rarity falling form him, which resulted in Spike challenging him to a duel, which consisted of Spike trying to land a hit, and failing due to the fact that his opponent was a full-fledged adventurer, for 20 minutes straight. In the end, Umamaru conceded, gave Spike one of his spare katanas, and offered to stay for a week to teach him. The session ended with this conversation:
Dusty(me): So, we're thinkin' o' goin' ta Canterlot next. (pause) It better or worse'n here?
Twilight(DM): (pause then sigh) Well it's definitely quieter.
Dusty(me): So, we're thinkin' o' goin' ta Canterlot next. (pause) It better or worse'n here?
Twilight(DM): (pause then sigh) Well it's definitely quieter.
First session that I ever DMed. Very beginning, everyone is inside a tavern where they've spent the night, they've all gotten a letter inviting them to the manor of a prominent figure in the town offering to hire them for something.
Thing is, one of the players - the bard, naturally - had bought some chickens with his starting gold. A hundred of them. (I let this go because he and I are good friends, and besides, it would probably start some interesting conversation in-character, if nothing else. I trusted him enough to not misuse a power like that. If mean, seriously, a hundred chickens? If you've ever played a Zelda game, you know what happens if you hit a Cuckoo...)
Anyway, they all wake up inside. They're about to leave for the manor, when the Bard asks me where his chickens are - after all, they're not in a very large room. I tell him there don't seem to be any chickens in there, and the entire party suddenly becomes far more organized and purposed, as they canvas every inch... of this small room looking for chickens. After all, they might be hiding under the floorboards or something, right?
It only got better when the sorcerer/druid cast Ghost Sound to make clucking outside the window. Despite there being a door mere feet away, one of the players decided it was in his best interest to leap through the window, fail a Reflex save, and take large damage as I rolled far too well for the shards of glass hitting him. There were, of course, no chickens outside where he landed, either.
Thankfully, after a mere forty-five minutes of fruitless searching, the party finally decided to try again later after they had met this person at his manor.
And so they arrived there, and were ushered into his antechamber... where a hundred unharmed chickens had been waiting for more than an hour.
Thing is, one of the players - the bard, naturally - had bought some chickens with his starting gold. A hundred of them. (I let this go because he and I are good friends, and besides, it would probably start some interesting conversation in-character, if nothing else. I trusted him enough to not misuse a power like that. If mean, seriously, a hundred chickens? If you've ever played a Zelda game, you know what happens if you hit a Cuckoo...)
Anyway, they all wake up inside. They're about to leave for the manor, when the Bard asks me where his chickens are - after all, they're not in a very large room. I tell him there don't seem to be any chickens in there, and the entire party suddenly becomes far more organized and purposed, as they canvas every inch... of this small room looking for chickens. After all, they might be hiding under the floorboards or something, right?
It only got better when the sorcerer/druid cast Ghost Sound to make clucking outside the window. Despite there being a door mere feet away, one of the players decided it was in his best interest to leap through the window, fail a Reflex save, and take large damage as I rolled far too well for the shards of glass hitting him. There were, of course, no chickens outside where he landed, either.
Thankfully, after a mere forty-five minutes of fruitless searching, the party finally decided to try again later after they had met this person at his manor.
And so they arrived there, and were ushered into his antechamber... where a hundred unharmed chickens had been waiting for more than an hour.
In our current campaign, I'm running a human Weresheep commoner. Afflicted. He has survived primarily as a result of the party's über tank and many uses of healing spells, but on a few occasions has truly shone.
So far, our most insane side quest was when our wizard/druid noticed a group of 25 goblins trying to attack us in the night. Rather than waking the party or having his (large) wolf companion and its small dire wolf pack (from earlier in the main quest) attack them, he convinced them that he was powerful, and that they should fear him. They ended up asking our help to get rid of kobolds who had kicked them out, and we each got our own band of 5. Between the commoner and his bodyguard (the knight card from the deck of many things), and the fact that it was the full moon, my 5 were turned in no time. The kobolds never expected to see 7 sheep charging them, let alone the damage reduction.
Ever since, the commoner has set a personal goal to found a kingdom of Weresheep.
So far, our most insane side quest was when our wizard/druid noticed a group of 25 goblins trying to attack us in the night. Rather than waking the party or having his (large) wolf companion and its small dire wolf pack (from earlier in the main quest) attack them, he convinced them that he was powerful, and that they should fear him. They ended up asking our help to get rid of kobolds who had kicked them out, and we each got our own band of 5. Between the commoner and his bodyguard (the knight card from the deck of many things), and the fact that it was the full moon, my 5 were turned in no time. The kobolds never expected to see 7 sheep charging them, let alone the damage reduction.
Ever since, the commoner has set a personal goal to found a kingdom of Weresheep.
I once got the Platter of Infinite Breaded Meat, by asking the dragon guarding the treasure room to investigate it in exchange a really shiny but ordinary silver tray I got by a breaking and entering. Any question? :D
D&D Archtype Jokes?
The amusing detail of this for my group is that the jokes aren't intentional. They just happen to plan out their ideas poorly. :3
Stabby McWizard-- the mage who loves to get into melee combat rather than cast spells. The only spells he ever cast were Grease (so he could close in to tank) and Summon Monster 1 (so he could close in to tank with a flanker)
Mage Monk-- He was a monk with a robe of useful things. No, he had no spellcasting classes, but considered himself a spellcaster solely because of the robe. He even attempted to use items designed for spellcasters on the off change it might work for him. Too bad this monk didn't have ranks in 'Use Magical Device'. The player gave up on the character after an ogre sundered his magic robe (and his head) with a battle axe.
Dudly Do Wright-- He was a Chaotic Neutral rogue for 16 levels. He womanized, drank beer like a fish, and used every dirty fighting trick in the book. ...until he got ahold of a Holy Avenger. He then completely worked himself into a stupor trying to get his alignment changed so that he could qualify for 1 level of Paladin and use the Holy Avenger's full potential. Once he accomplished Paladinhood on his 17th level, he lost it all when he immediately used the sword for sneak-attacks on a messenger delivering a note to the party.
The amusing detail of this for my group is that the jokes aren't intentional. They just happen to plan out their ideas poorly. :3
Stabby McWizard-- the mage who loves to get into melee combat rather than cast spells. The only spells he ever cast were Grease (so he could close in to tank) and Summon Monster 1 (so he could close in to tank with a flanker)
Mage Monk-- He was a monk with a robe of useful things. No, he had no spellcasting classes, but considered himself a spellcaster solely because of the robe. He even attempted to use items designed for spellcasters on the off change it might work for him. Too bad this monk didn't have ranks in 'Use Magical Device'. The player gave up on the character after an ogre sundered his magic robe (and his head) with a battle axe.
Dudly Do Wright-- He was a Chaotic Neutral rogue for 16 levels. He womanized, drank beer like a fish, and used every dirty fighting trick in the book. ...until he got ahold of a Holy Avenger. He then completely worked himself into a stupor trying to get his alignment changed so that he could qualify for 1 level of Paladin and use the Holy Avenger's full potential. Once he accomplished Paladinhood on his 17th level, he lost it all when he immediately used the sword for sneak-attacks on a messenger delivering a note to the party.
Shenanigans like this are why I love gestalt, since I have a hard time not optimizing to some degree. From the logical monk/cloistered cleric combo, playable as a religious contemplative, to the cheesy fighter/wizard/sorcerer/ultimate magus - who, aside from Githyanki racials, had the casting of a tenth level wizard and a seventh-level sorcerer on top of the bonus feats and BAB of a ninth-level fighter at 10th level. Later, I reread the rules for gestalt and realized it broke a few major rules, but the DM didn't care by then, being more concerned with the Barbarian/Conduit's 4d6/round 10-foot radius fire aura and Improved Trip feat chain. I helped build that too.
And those barely scratch the surface of what's possible... though they were all played in my first campaign. 'Twas hectic.
And those barely scratch the surface of what's possible... though they were all played in my first campaign. 'Twas hectic.
My players don't care much about optimizing. On a scale of 1 to 10 (Min-Max), they're usually a 4. But they have lots of fun playing whatever they make... usually. :)
That's good. I envy them; I usually range from 6 to 8 on such a scale. That said, I'm unwilling to compromise roleplayability for power, and try to make sure to have a sense of my character's identity so their actions are believable. It just means more time spent fine-tuning character builds for flavor and power. Which is why I have a four-inch stack of half-done character sheets in case I need something in a hurry... my PCs fight more goons with class levels than not, largely to make me feel better about making so many sheets - though it does give a nice sense of continuity, with everyone clearly operating under the same system. No NPC classes means bigger insurance premiums for tavernkeepers!
I tend to run about a 8 but concider myself justified since the DM likes to send us up agianst CR+12 encounters with no gear
I'm about a 6-7 myself. I'm also usually the GM, so part of my optimizing comes from the fact I'd like to have my characters last long enough that I can enjoy them before getting thrown back into the GM's seat. :)
As for NPCs, they exclusively use pc classes when I make em. Nothing like getting beaten up by a farmer with cleave. ;)
As for NPCs, they exclusively use pc classes when I make em. Nothing like getting beaten up by a farmer with cleave. ;)
Well, that all goes for both of us, then! Or would, if my players actually showed up; I've now got 3 homemade campaigns from level 5 to 25 waiting to be used, each with homebrew dungeons and monsters in addition to fine-tuned NPCs. >_<
I try to avoid min-maxing for long-lasting campaigns. I feel like they focus too much on performance in combat.I prefer to roll my stats and take what I get. That leaves me with the unfortunate case of characters with no stat higher than 13, but occasionally I get one with no stat lower than 15, and 2 maxed. When I get lower, though, I find ways to compensate through shenanigans. I have a racist gnome with a napoleon complex, a human Weresheep commoner aspiring to become a druid, and am soon to introduce a bard based on the more intimate forms of performance.
For new systems or campaigns I care less about, or as exercises in extremes, I like crazy combos. I currently have a halfling monk/barbarian/rogue to maximize damage output (with 42 bars of soap for creativity).I also just helped a friend build a Goliath character who does 9d6+10 damage at level 1.
For new systems or campaigns I care less about, or as exercises in extremes, I like crazy combos. I currently have a halfling monk/barbarian/rogue to maximize damage output (with 42 bars of soap for creativity).I also just helped a friend build a Goliath character who does 9d6+10 damage at level 1.
Only way i know of to get that kind of damage output at lv1 is To take the Vile Feat Willing Deformity:Obese on a focused specalist conjurer with a hummingbird familliar who uses Benign transportation to teleport himself+his full carrying capicity full of rocks on top of someone. I'm sure your method was much more elegant than a 2400 lb wizard warping on top of somebody.
Goliath with a gargantuan hammer and major bonus damage on a charge.
That hummingbird strat seems like it could be fun, though. Call him the sumomancer.
I think you mean "noble title"? Wouldn't she have to marry into royalty to get a "royal title"?
That would explain the king's uncertainty of whether or not he can arrange that!
Could be retroactively justified as her figuring that the king can do whatever he wants - because he's the king! If she wants to recover the barony, it's likely she already has some title.
...I'm overanalyzing a fictional character's madness-born fictional character's motives. Gaea help me.
Could be retroactively justified as her figuring that the king can do whatever he wants - because he's the king! If she wants to recover the barony, it's likely she already has some title.
...I'm overanalyzing a fictional character's madness-born fictional character's motives. Gaea help me.
Unless there happens to be a fake i.d. somewhere that you could take and become... did that already happen? was it in this comic series infact? well what do you know.
"Coming up with absurd D&D archetype jokes is difficult, especially when you've read enough stories to realize that someone has already topped you in the absurdity category across every archetype."
Cue Raxon.
Cue Raxon.
Or who ever else has the mind of infinte possablilities.
Yeah, where is he? He'd definitely have something.
Going over the top is fun.
Also, DNR only shows up occasionally, when I ask him to.
Well BlackMage wasn't really Manipulative but the rest fits.
My few over-the-top characters always get a couple redeeming features. Something to build upon as they adventure.
As for orphanages, I got attacked by zombie orphans once. That was just... creepy.
As for orphanages, I got attacked by zombie orphans once. That was just... creepy.
No orphans yet, just bizare scenarios where every freaking town seems to have parents/gaurdians/mentors for all of the children.
Maybe I should DM and the party finds a town populated only by orphans.
Maybe I should DM and the party finds a town populated only by orphans.
Wait, so the orphanage actually did attack first?
Huh.
Huh.
DM: (In Character, Dramatically.) "What great piece of fate, what reason did we meet today, so that you could rescue me?"
Me: (Bluntly) "Would you believe, "Dumb Luck."? "
DM: (Deflated, in a disappointed voice.) "Yes, yes I would."
Me: (Bluntly) "Would you believe, "Dumb Luck."? "
DM: (Deflated, in a disappointed voice.) "Yes, yes I would."
You shouldn't worry when you find yourself talking yourself. You shouldn't even be that concerned when you start arguing with yourself. You should be worried when you start losing those arguments.
The best part about arguing with yourself is that even when you lose, you still win. Conversely, the worst part is that even when you win, you lose!
Normally, yes. When you lose without winning, that's the time for concern.
Is it sad to say that I lost to myself in Tic-Tac-Toe? If so, the score is 0-3... My inner concience is obviously smarter than my actual concience.
I've played campaigns by myself before, but thankfully my "players" aren't this loony...
i want to be in a game set in gothum (can't spell it) where i can have this conversation with the joker and harly q.
gm as the joker: any last words?
me: before i say it, is harly q in the room?
gm:yes...
me:my last word are...when are you two getting married.? (pointing to joker and hq)
gm as joker: tha fig?
me: you do know that theres a site rasing money for your LEGAL marige right? they raised 5 million to see it happen.
whats bad is i was close to doing this tipe of game with diffrent carters. o well yaw have some great ideas i might have to steal and use at some point. keep this wonderful comic strong i hope to see it hit 1k comics at some point
gm as the joker: any last words?
me: before i say it, is harly q in the room?
gm:yes...
me:my last word are...when are you two getting married.? (pointing to joker and hq)
gm as joker: tha fig?
me: you do know that theres a site rasing money for your LEGAL marige right? they raised 5 million to see it happen.
whats bad is i was close to doing this tipe of game with diffrent carters. o well yaw have some great ideas i might have to steal and use at some point. keep this wonderful comic strong i hope to see it hit 1k comics at some point
Lets see. We have the role player, the loot nut (never satisfied with what you give them until they become so overpowered that gods call them OP), The fighter, and the plain nut (just crazy but can be fun until they complained that they died. Now we need the rule lawers, the min maxer, the one that insists on using dice solve all for social or combat (I rolled a twenty so he should let me be king now) and the as long as I say it then it should solve all for social (with a charisma dump stat of 3) and combat with some quote of something (s)he heard.
Unlike many things, the reality of tabletop absurdity is far more impressive than the imagination.