Page 430 - Here As Promised

19th Apr 2014, 6:00 AM in Intermission 4
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Here As Promised
Average Rating: 4.75 (4 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 19th Apr 2014, 6:00 AM edit delete
Author: DoubleCross

Guest Author’s Note: "She even put a candy skull and bone in there for extra realism. She's a craftswoman after my own heart.

"Also yes, that is a bunch of terrible DnD party ideas written by a person who has neither direct relation to DnD, nor real party experience. Just go with it."

Notice: Guest comic submissions are open! Guidelines here. Deadline: January 27th, 2023.



Specter 19th Apr 2014, 6:04 AM edit delete reply
I feel like I this is beyond what Twilight and Fluttershy was expecting.

Quick, in reference to the Craftswoman quote in the author note, what have you or a party member created that had some benefit/toll on your party/enemies?
Digo 19th Apr 2014, 6:54 AM edit delete reply
I once created several vehicles out of LEGO for a major car chase scene. This had the benefit that as vehicles took damage, I removed pieces to show it. And when a vehicle ran out of hit points, I'd crunch them into a pile of parts. >:D

dracostarcloud 19th Apr 2014, 8:12 AM edit delete reply
My Pathfinder Society Bard participated in a mission that gave the chance to have his own Clockwork Spy if he paid to have it repaired. To sum Clockwork Spy up, it's a small mechanical spider that can fly and is primarily meant to record things. He's an aspiring superstar, so of course he wants a neat-looking thing that records his voice.

The next adventure required a lot of information gathering and now he just happened to have something to record voices with! This Clockwork Spy also got used as a seeing eye dog (it has Darkvision while the Bard only has Low-Light), a courier (we used it to fly a magical item over a wall), and a warrior (I was going to use it to give me flanking bonuses).
Chakat Firepaw 19th Apr 2014, 5:48 PM edit delete reply
Sorry Draco, but the flanking idea wouldn't have worked: Tiny and smaller creatures can't flank.
kriss1989 19th Apr 2014, 8:23 AM edit delete reply
I did mention my eternal wand crafting last comic right? I do a couple attack spells, start cranking out utility ones, and suddenly I'm a magic Swiss army knife, and then I prepare my spells for the day! My goal is always to out arsenal a sorcerer before I even prepare my wizards spells for the day. The sorcerer can spontaneously cast? That's nice. I can cast three fireballs, three lightning bolts, three invisibilities, and three Mage armor before I even expend a spell slot. Get on my level!
Disloyal Subject 19th Apr 2014, 3:13 PM Craft edit delete reply
Over the course of my Orsimer divine mage's first few battles, the loot rolls kept yielding beautiful shields with surprisingly awesome heraldry, but they were too heavy (and marketable!) to keep them all. So I started making use of my customary single Craft skill - smithing this time, as the child of a militaristic culture - to make little badges as replicas of them. This birthed a tradition of making badges as mementos of impactful battles, kept on a seldom-worn supple leather bandolier in my inventory. Having successfully snuck into a very xenophobic Nord city, a few of us went to rendezvous with our client, dressed in our finest. (Not very fine, considering we'd just endured a hell of a trek through a mountain pass infested with guards and bandits, but we at least patched the holes and dusted off the mud and tree sap.) I put on my little sash'o'shields to lend some classiness, and... surprise, surprise; the client's under surveillance by the town council, and when they find out adventurers are here, they're pissed. But I managed to leave a trail of badges for the rest of the party to follow, and they busted us out of jail before anyone could decide to execute us.
Never did get back some of those - street urchins probably got 'em - but I made new replicas with some of my treasure. I was the only party member who didn't hoard gold pieces, but I always had enough jewelry to compensate. I'm surprised they never gave me grief over that... maybe they figured questioning a hippie orc's masculinity was a bad idea.
Destrustor 19th Apr 2014, 6:07 AM edit delete reply
Wow. Amazing art, DoubleCross!
It's always cool to see hand-drawn stuff here, makes a striking contrast to the usual comics.
Crystalite 19th Apr 2014, 6:14 AM edit delete reply
Maverick, in Who You Gonna Call, determined that ghosts can be made "visible" by tossing magnets at them. While this is helpful, the supposed volunteer didn't like that...
FanOfMostEverything 19th Apr 2014, 6:16 AM edit delete reply
Musical stirges isn't the worst musical monster idea. Imagine musical vargouilles. Instead of chairs, you use necks.
Disloyal Subject 19th Apr 2014, 3:33 PM Stirges and Vargouilles edit delete reply
Funny; every time I almost use stirges, I wind up using vargouilles instead. The bloody things horrify me, but they fit my dungeons better than overgrown mosquitoes.
As far as actually musical monsters go, though, it's hard to beat a Scrag Bard who plays bluegrass music. Don't recall where I saw that, but it still makes me chuckle.
FanOfMostEverything 20th Apr 2014, 5:04 AM edit delete reply
Well, there was that one time I made Quincy, the operatic otyugh bard. He had a lovely deal with a dwarven fortress: all-you-can-eat garbage in exchange for not getting killed by adventurers and a free practice space (or, as the dwarves thought of it, the midden.)
Grey Pennies 19th Apr 2014, 6:16 AM edit delete reply
Spin The Basilisk sounds like all kinds of not-fun...
DoubleCross 19th Apr 2014, 6:32 PM edit delete reply
Its alternate name is Riddle Roulette.

You put one in a Chamber...
Digo 19th Apr 2014, 7:29 PM edit delete reply
Like a Gravatron ride?
Derpmind 19th Apr 2014, 6:54 AM edit delete reply
Just a theoretical question: Is it at all possible that a party-themed adventuring party would not be completely overpowered?
Guest 19th Apr 2014, 3:16 PM edit delete reply
Absolutely. They could also be underpowered.
Of course, applying their talents in unexpected ways would probably more than make up for that.
Digo 19th Apr 2014, 6:55 AM edit delete reply
Wow, we got some nice art here. Cool work DoubleCross!
Zmaxter 19th Apr 2014, 7:05 AM edit delete reply
Damn gigantic gelatinous cubes are the worst.
I've only faced two though.
One was quite easy, but the second one ended up making a really important NPC blow himself into it.
They both died, but the NPC became a god so w/e.
Guest 19th Apr 2014, 9:10 AM DeS_Tructive edit delete reply
Cubes are absolutely deadly if used the right way:
DM: "The air in the passage in front of you seems to sparkle oddly, almost as if reflecting light. There's also some items floating in it."
*After some pondering and probing, the players discover an antigravity spell and an adventurers loot, including an artifact*
DM repeats the event until the players assume it's a trope and press onward.
DM: "Well, actually, THIS time, it's a jelly cube that filled the whole corridor and you ran blindly in to it. Anyone have acid resist?" *gathers dice*
Euric 19th Apr 2014, 11:38 AM edit delete reply
That is so brilliantly devious... I might need to try that some time.
Chakat Firepaw 19th Apr 2014, 5:52 PM edit delete reply
There's a nasty trick that you can play on overly savvy players:

Have a pit with a gelatin cube at the bottom. That isn't a creature, it's just Jello.

Watch as they try to kill it rather than save their poor point man from drowning.
Zarhon 19th Apr 2014, 8:51 AM edit delete reply
Impressive work, DC!

Assuming the cube isn't acidic, how are Twilight/Fluttershy talking/ not suffocating within it?
Specter 19th Apr 2014, 9:28 AM edit delete reply
Magical? Kind of like the water soccer thing from final fantasy X. (I think)
Raxon 19th Apr 2014, 9:58 AM edit delete reply
Oh! You mean drownball?
kriss1989 19th Apr 2014, 10:01 AM edit delete reply
No, Blitzball players hold their breath for five minutes at a time, and the teams have areas they can retreat into to breath. You can see them in one of the first cutscenes in the game.
Malroth 20th Apr 2014, 12:16 AM edit delete reply
You know Blackmage you aren't fooling anyone with this whole "Raxon" persona.
Specter 19th Apr 2014, 5:27 PM edit delete reply
In my defense Kriss1989, I have never actually played the game except the demo.
T 19th Apr 2014, 7:24 PM edit delete reply
Maybe those two aren't TS and FS but candy statues made by Pinkie and the real ones are looking at the jello out of panel.
Digo 19th Apr 2014, 7:34 PM edit delete reply
Or Pinkie had a LOT of gelatin mix lying around :D
DoubleCross 20th Apr 2014, 5:12 AM edit delete reply

Their Fuzzbucket-style nonplusment itself (a la "I Don't 'Get' Goat Simulator") will keep them alive for a few hours.
Raxon 19th Apr 2014, 9:47 AM edit delete reply
Mmmm, this imminent death is apple flavored!
Razomyure 19th Apr 2014, 7:32 PM edit delete reply
Last words: "We should really leave the apple crisp to AJ next time. Pinkie's got her heart in the right place. but..." *glubbing noises*
Other Guest 19th Apr 2014, 1:14 PM edit delete reply
I see she also invited Cube from Rusty and Co.
Ann Lies 19th Apr 2014, 1:34 PM Stirge edit delete reply
I had my players fight a bunch of Stirge once in an underground tunnel. They were having fun, killing, trying to avoid attacks, but there was one Stirge that couldn't hit the broad side of a barn for some reason. He was pretty much a black hole of bad rolls. Pretty soon my players just ignored him, he was literally that bad. After starting to take him down (they cut off one wing and part of his snout) someone decided to try and tame him. The battered and mutilated Stirge that couldn't hit anything became the team pet, and they named him Chummy. Something similar happened with a goblin once, but that's another story.

Ann lies.

The Other One
Guest 19th Apr 2014, 3:35 PM edit delete reply
How would one make a barbed devil cake? Devil's food with red velvet icing and spiny protrusions?
Had to look up phantom fungus. Should be a good match-up for my test subjects - er, party.
Digo 19th Apr 2014, 7:38 PM edit delete reply
Use candy corn for the spiny protrusions to be extra evil.
DoubleCross 20th Apr 2014, 5:09 AM edit delete reply
As the person who wrote this damn comic I'm guessing it has something to do with those little pointy chocolate drop decorations (milk/dark on the top for the spines and white in the filling for the teeth) and probably green food dye, seeing the pictures in a Google Image Search.
Other Guest 19th Apr 2014, 4:41 PM edit delete reply
The scene today with Rarity and the jewelry was tailor made for this comic.
Razomyure 19th Apr 2014, 7:34 PM edit delete reply
Honestly, I think angel food cake in this context would be much more deadly/dangerous than Hamatula cake. (Barbed Devil)
Splinter 19th Apr 2014, 7:51 PM edit delete reply
It's about time you posted a guest comic that wasn't a complete pile of crap.
EuricEuri 19th Apr 2014, 11:36 PM edit delete reply
Ouch. Don't you think that is a little bit harsh?
Raxon 20th Apr 2014, 1:21 AM edit delete reply
Wow. Harsh much?

Wait, did Umicross make the filler with black rarity? Because I really liked that one!
Destrustor 20th Apr 2014, 1:26 AM edit delete reply
What, you mean like your crappy opinion no one cares about?

Edit: Yeah, okay. Sorry, Newbiespud.
Newbiespud 20th Apr 2014, 4:02 AM edit delete reply
Woah, woah, let's not start a fight here. I know Splinter's picking one, but let's not start one.

Raxon, that was Jovey4.
Raxon 20th Apr 2014, 9:10 AM edit delete reply
Wait. I read the comment wrong. I thought she said it was the first of Umicross's guest comics that didn't suck, and I was racking my brain trying to remember which comics she made previously.

Splinter, I don't like your tone. Would you like to step outside?
DoubleCross 20th Apr 2014, 5:05 AM edit delete reply
@Splinter :<

I know you're attempting to compliment me but I'd rather you not do it by insulting everyone else. That feels more insulting than you disliking my comic!
crazyredemu aka Spiffy 20th Apr 2014, 5:46 AM edit delete reply
Ah, he's just jealous.
Splinter 20th Apr 2014, 11:36 AM edit delete reply
I have achieved exactly the amount of attention and responses I craved. Glorious.
Splinter 20th Apr 2014, 11:38 AM edit delete reply
Especially Destrustor. He gave me MORE. So happy.
DoubleCross 20th Apr 2014, 12:56 PM edit delete reply
Bombom 20th Apr 2014, 1:29 PM edit delete reply
Well, if that is the exact amount of comments, I will add one more to throw it off. Good day to you sir. I wish you well.
Newbiespud 20th Apr 2014, 2:13 PM edit delete reply
Well, at least it was just trolling, it didn't escalate any further ("Glorious"? You have some low standards for outrage, Splinter. You only got one personal insult!), and the game was given up quickly.

That said, while I can appreciate an okay troll once, I won't tolerate it a second time.
Raxon 21st Apr 2014, 2:03 AM edit delete reply
Yeah. Not very impressive. I mean, if he had accepted my invitation, I would have put something like this...

*slams door behand Splinter* And I win. Sucker.

And it would have been mildly amusing.

That said, you generally don't seem to mind when I troll, though I suppose that has more to do with the intentions behind it. After all, I only mess with you guys because you're cool.

Except for that asshole with the glasses and moustache. He's just a prick.
definitelynotRaxon 21st Apr 2014, 2:12 AM edit delete reply
I say! I quite take offense at that, you ill mannered, foul mouthed cad!
Digo 21st Apr 2014, 4:57 AM edit delete reply
When you troll, Raxon, you generally keep it classy.
kriss1989 21st Apr 2014, 5:21 AM edit delete reply
Yes, troll logic and rediculous ideas instead of flipping birds and insults. Truly, your disruptive insanity is of a higher caliber and greater taste than most. I salute you. *sips Zinfandel*
Zuche 20th Apr 2014, 5:00 PM edit delete reply
Thank you for the comic, DoubleCross. I liked it.

I will also take this opportunity to thank Lyntermas, Spiffy, and DracoStarcloud for their guest strips. Thank you all.
dracostarcloud 21st Apr 2014, 12:43 AM edit delete reply
Thank you for saying thank you and you're welcome! (b^_^)b
Digo 21st Apr 2014, 4:58 AM edit delete reply
Lots of great stuff all around!
Raxon 21st Apr 2014, 7:40 AM edit delete reply
I wouldn't have rated them highly if I didn't like them.
spudwalt 8th May 2017, 12:16 AM edit delete reply
The last time I read this, I didn't know what a stirge was.

Now I do (for anyone else in the dark, they're these gross bat-mosquito things), and how would musical stirges work? Train a stirge to latch onto someone when the music stops, a la hot potato?
spudwalt 8th May 2017, 12:16 AM edit delete reply
The last time I read this, I didn't know what a stirge was.

Now I do (for anyone else in the dark, they're these gross bat-mosquito things), and how would musical stirges work? Train a stirge to latch onto someone when the music stops, a la hot potato?