Page 530 - Social Subterfuge

16th Dec 2014, 5:00 AM in Luna Eclipsed
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Social Subterfuge
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Newbiespud 16th Dec 2014, 5:00 AM edit delete
Fishing a little bit with this Story Time: Using underhanded or elaborate tactics to accomplish a relatively mundane thing in a roleplaying game?

Notice: Guest comic submissions are still open until this arc is finished! Guidelines here.



GeorgieLeech 16th Dec 2014, 5:15 AM edit delete reply
In a 4e adventure, after a dungeon, we were about 10 gold short of a magic item the party really wanted to get. We ended up concocting an elaborate ruse wherein my rogue would pretend to be Monsieur Acle of a distant lordship, who was then "pickpocketed" by a random patsy in the crowd, who in fact our other rogue had just scoped out as having 10 gp. After threatening various trade repercussions and such, and with supporting testimony from the rest of the party who were posing as various manservants and the like, the guards confiscated the stolen goods and returned them to me post haste, for which I promised favourable relations in the future.

Probably would have been more expedient to just steal it, but this way the guards wouldn't suspect a thing. And now Mon. Acle pops up whenever we need a generic nobleman.
Random Lurker 16th Dec 2014, 10:06 AM edit delete reply
Also, you could have just haggled for the item. But why do it the easy way?
Jennifer 16th Dec 2014, 5:21 AM edit delete reply
That sounds like pretty much half the stories of KODT. Not to mention the modus operandi of any paranoid group. Or Twilight sneaking into the Canterlot Archives.

Players: We camp outside the innocuous-looking door, look for pit traps, look for electric traps, look for poison traps, look for arrow traps, and look for monsters.
GM: You find no traps or monsters.
Thief: OK, our find trap skill might be too low. I'm going to approach the door hanging from the ceiling, affix a rope to the knob, slide it through some staples in the ceiling, then fall back and pull the rope with a ten-foot pole.
GM: The door opens.
Players: We send a henchman in to investigate.
GM: He says it's fine, come on in.
Wizard: He could be suborned or coerced into saying that!
tinskin 16th Dec 2014, 8:10 AM edit delete reply
There are few things more feared in PnP games than doors.
Raxon 16th Dec 2014, 8:59 AM edit delete reply
In our games, it's doors and rust monsters. Geeze, you give one rust monster class levels in monk, and suddenly everyone thinks you're out to get the ranger.

How was I supposed to know a medium sized, level 14 monk rust monster would almost wipe out a party of 4 level 10 players?

I mean, one of them was a wizard, and wizards are already pretty dang powerful at that point. Between a paladin, a ranger, a barbarian, and a wizard, I thought it would give them a challenge as a solo, not kill half the party.

In my defense, this monster only had 150 hp, but apparently, the ability to catch and eat arrows was OP.
Freelance 16th Dec 2014, 1:55 PM edit delete reply
"How was I supposed to know a medium sized, level 14 monk rust monster would almost wipe out a party of 4 level 10 players?"

Probably because most warriors' equipment is metal by that point? And if it has the ability to become a monk, it'd likely have the intelligence to know the wizard would be the biggest threat?
Raxon 16th Dec 2014, 6:04 PM edit delete reply
Heh. Actually, they almost died because the rust monster's ki strike works with his bite attack, and they charged it, even though I made it pretty clear it was just guarding a nest. It also held a tin bowl in its jaws, holding it out to them.

I did everything I could to show them that it was not hostile, short of caring for an orphaned baby.
Malroth 16th Dec 2014, 6:47 PM edit delete reply
Well given the synergy of unarmed attacks with rust monsters, Monk is almost certianly an ascociated class for an awakened rust monster so class levels stack 1 for 1 with CR making the creature a CR 18 encounter which according to the DMG's CR vs lv chart should almost certianly result in TPK unless deus ex machina occurs, not to say It was the most powerful class it could have taken but it was immune from weapons, would successfully save vs their highest lv spells on a 4+ and has spell resistance they'd fail 70% of the time. TPK really shouldn't have been a surprise.
Raxon 16th Dec 2014, 8:57 PM edit delete reply
Eh, these guys killed a pair of dragons, each CR 13 alone. They were minmaxed out the wazoo. The rust monster went down pretty darn fast once the ranger switched to wooden arrows, and the wizard whipped out the spells that don't have will saves.

But not before killing tbe barbarian and paladin, the front line fighters.
Specter 16th Dec 2014, 9:43 AM edit delete reply
This is one of those wonderful times a character like mine would come in handy.

Kenny Carmine: Guys, don't worry, I got this.---

Outcome 1) Door opens, and nothing happens.

Outcome 2) Kenny gets hurt or killed, but none of the real members of the team are in danger.
Raxon 16th Dec 2014, 5:23 AM edit delete reply
I suppose I should explain a little for this one. You see, there was this shop where I saw the best sword. I wanted it.

However, I didn't want to pay full price, so I devised a cunning plan. I joined the city guard in order to take advantage of a discount, scrubbed the barrack floors for several days, and did the bottom rung jobs. At the end of the week, I went to the shop, only to find that they had removed their discount for city guard and military.

That was when my character, who already had a demonic symbiont thing that made him stronger but tried to turn him to evil, snapped.
you know that guy 16th Dec 2014, 5:13 PM edit delete reply
Could be worse. I'm reminded of the episode where Huey Dewey and Louie want their allowance a day early to take advantage of a sale. They gaslight Uncle Scrooge into thinking it's a day later than it really is. By the time they get to the store, Scrooge has convinced everyone else it's later, so the sale has expired.
Digo 17th Dec 2014, 5:39 AM edit delete reply
I remember that episode :D
Disloyal Subject 16th Dec 2014, 5:39 AM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
Underhanded, elaborate schemes were the Contract Workers' MO. We wanted to be certain everything would go right, which led to a 1-session mission lasting for over a dozen...
For a specific example, there was the sabotage of a scientist pony named Relative Theory. We needed to knock him out of the running for a flower contest, so we spent an inordinate amount of time acquiring cake ingredients, baked a cake with a custom additive from the alchemist's mutagenic Red Flower, and gave him the cake after offering to move his large, heavy flower display home for him so he could rest up for the judging tomorrow. While he Hulked out and smashed up his own lab in a berzerk frenzy, we were getting up to mischief elsewhere... I don't recall the details, aside from magically knocking out a guard and arranging some empty bottles from a dumpster around him in an alley, but the next morning we used a copy of his flower displays remote control to make it careen about uncontrollably and explode, disqualifying the poor stallion for endangering the public health.
Digo 16th Dec 2014, 5:41 AM edit delete reply
I think I've already told all the good ones under this topic. Still love how our FBI team went through so much trouble for free cigarettes and booze.

In one of my Fallout: Equestria games, I did come up with a pretty elaborate way of throwing an NPC under a bus. Didn't get to use it, but the set up was sound:

We were blackmailed to assassinate a leader's brother. We didn't want to do it, but the only other choice was we get put to the Mage Guild firing squad. So we go under cover to the party. One PC managed to get a changeling to join up and have the changeling disguised as her at the party. The PC only told me about that detail. So my character's idea was to find our target and alert him that a changeling assassin is at the party looking for him. So when the guards come down with the hammer on the bug, I grab the other PCs and we leave the party during the panic, spreading the word back to the leader that the assassination attempt was thwarted and one of us was 'killed'. We go and ditch the guild of course.

Might have worked, but then a Reaver showed up.
Raxon 16th Dec 2014, 5:59 AM edit delete reply
Gorram reavers.
Digo 16th Dec 2014, 7:18 AM edit delete reply
Usually yeah, but in this case it's had the benefit of my character stuck in a panic room with the cute NPC he has a crush on. And she's actually flirting with my character.

So hey, I can't complain right now. :D
Disloyal Subject 16th Dec 2014, 7:32 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
Reavers sound like a bad enemy to fight - which also makes them a good enemy, for my current character makes little distinction between the two concepts.
What are they in the context of Fallout? I'm familiar with Firefly's (gorram crazy bastards definitely fall into the 'good/bad' enemy category) but not Fallout's.
Digo 16th Dec 2014, 7:52 PM edit delete reply
Well they aren't too different from Firefly's concept in terms of "people you don't want to meet". :)

These Reavers are undead that eat flesh, hate everyone, and wear armor to laugh at your weapons.
Alice 16th Dec 2014, 5:42 AM edit delete reply
This is a tough one. I'm usually "good" so I rarely use underhanded means, but to do something mundane? What counts as mundane? There was the time I played a mimic and used my transformation abilities (and adhesive) to trap a fairy and get her to join the party. (it was another player)

As for elaborate... there was the time our group's new kleptomaniac and power gamer decided to steal from the guy that was fixing our cart. My character was a detective (and eventually a paladin) so of course I had to solve it. I spent the rest of the session looking around for clues, questioning witnesses, and rolling every single skill I could think of. Of course, the dude was a ninja. he cracked the safe when no one was looking and left virtually no evidence. The only hints I had were that he was a thief, and no one else had been close enough. Just when I was about to give up, I was stuck with divine inspiration. I let him talk. I asked just the right questions and he left just enough of a contradiction for me to let out the biggest, most spectacular logic bomb I had ever conceived in my lifetime. Within an instant, his entire story and all credibility fell to pieces. ...then he rolled a really high bluff check and got away without admitting anything.
kriss1989 16th Dec 2014, 6:18 AM edit delete reply
Even with the -20 penalty to bluff?
Digo 16th Dec 2014, 7:21 AM edit delete reply
This is where I'd say what was said should take presidence over the roll. :)
Alice 18th Dec 2014, 5:51 AM edit delete reply
I will simply say that some people are stupidly lucky. I would say something about power gaming, but my detective eventually got a diplomacy bonus so high that its effectively mind control.
Siccarus 16th Dec 2014, 1:59 PM edit delete reply
Did you yell out OBJECTION! ?
Guest 18th Dec 2014, 5:52 AM edit delete reply
It was a while back, so I don't remember, but I wouldn't be surprised.
Jaxx 16th Dec 2014, 6:38 AM edit delete reply
Closest I have for complex is my changeling character in a Fallout Equestria campaign is levitating knives and stabbing them into pegasi wings, then teleporting them into the air. Fuck the Enclave right?
Digo 16th Dec 2014, 7:24 AM edit delete reply
I certainly have not had good experiences with the Enclave. They gunned down an NPC I liked, and who's only crime was reloading a weapon in the middle of a combat zone.

What system did you use for your changeling? Cause the FO:E system I'm working with doesn't have changelings as a playable race.
Specter 16th Dec 2014, 9:51 AM edit delete reply
@Digo, could use a house-rules version of Aspirations of Harmony like Newbiespud's FiD game. It has all of the races (I think), and from what has been demonstrated, it has a lot of wiggle room to do stuff to your liking. But this is from someone who took nearly 6-8 months to finally find where the rules was and everything...

@Jaxx, Sweet move friend, it's ironic and leads to a (hopefully) enemies' death. Also, same quote as you, but MOST of the Enclave. There are some who are actually pretty good and honest. Most of the hate able one's just happen to be in the military (I found that out when I nearly failed at stopping an ally from killing an unarmed enclave civi).
Digo 17th Dec 2014, 5:42 AM edit delete reply
I suppose that would work. :)

The system my two FO:E games use is okay, but whoever designed them really needs to update a lot of the errors. and index the 'PHB' to make it easy to find stuff.

My favorite error is the pen-sized laser pointer that costs half a bottlecap and weighs 20 pounds. XD
you know that guy 17th Dec 2014, 9:07 AM edit delete reply
I could think of a couple uses for that. Cheap ballast, or reverse pickpocketing for encumbrance.
Jaxx 16th Dec 2014, 5:45 PM edit delete reply
We use a homebrew game. Only race not allowed was Alicorn, or a fully grown dragon.
Jaxx 16th Dec 2014, 6:38 AM edit delete reply
Closest I have for complex is my changeling character in a Fallout Equestria campaign is levitating knives and stabbing them into pegasi wings, then teleporting them into the air. Fuck the Enclave right?
Ransom 16th Dec 2014, 7:15 AM edit delete reply
Heh, a bit of drama, I'm genuinely curious who the pranking stallion could be.

Side note with regards to Pinkie's actions in "Luna Eclipsed," I think the episode actually makes perfect sense if you assume not only Pinkie but all the children are only acting scared from the beginning, assuming this is part of the holiday festivities and followed Pinkie's lead. Which is why Pip screams that his bottom has been gobbled when it clearly has not.

The adults though, are legitimately scared, though less from thinking she's Nightmare Moon than from the fact that they assume she's ticked at their holiday.
Specter 16th Dec 2014, 9:40 AM edit delete reply
Something seems wrong about the first speech bubble... shouldn't there be a "of" between 'hearts' and 'your'?


I'm not that good with grammar, but I'm just wondering, correct me if Im wrong.
Newbiespud 16th Dec 2014, 12:00 PM edit delete reply
Aw, man... You write a sentence, then you edit the end of that sentence, then you edit the middle of that sentence, and then you realize a couple of days later that you forgot to reconnect the two edited phrases. I hate when that happens.

Xander 16th Dec 2014, 9:42 AM edit delete reply
Hah. This is cool. Not normally a MLP fan, but this thing sorta makes me wanna play an MLP tabletop game sometime.
Raxon 16th Dec 2014, 12:46 PM edit delete reply
Specter 16th Dec 2014, 1:50 PM edit delete reply
Please ignore the creepy one, he's not our spokesperson.
Xander 16th Dec 2014, 4:02 PM edit delete reply
I expect some degree of ridiculousness from him. He's got deadpool as his avatar.
Super Kami Guru 16th Dec 2014, 6:06 PM edit delete reply
Maybe not our spokesperson, but trickster with no bound to his horrific imagination and yet stills comes off as a charming, if only a little bit psychotic friend? Yes.
Mykin 16th Dec 2014, 7:43 PM edit delete reply
So he's our version of Discord?
j-eagle12212012 16th Dec 2014, 6:59 PM edit delete reply
All hail Raxon our mighty spokesperson lol
Disloyal Subject 16th Dec 2014, 7:37 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
Xander 16th Dec 2014, 8:53 PM edit delete reply
Oh god, what have I started?
Disloyal Subject 16th Dec 2014, 9:18 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
Don't worry, we do this once in a while. Check the archives' comments; we're all mad here.
you know that guy 17th Dec 2014, 9:08 AM edit delete reply
You're mad too. Otherwise you wouldn't be here.
Mykin 16th Dec 2014, 10:26 PM edit delete reply
"Oh god, what have I started?

I ask myself that a lot, especially when I unwittingly add fuel to the fire with a follow up comment. Don't worry, it'll pass soon enough and you too can pretend it never happened. :D
Specter 16th Dec 2014, 10:46 PM edit delete reply
We can only hope Mykin, we can only hope.
Digo 17th Dec 2014, 5:44 AM edit delete reply
Digo 17th Dec 2014, 5:43 AM edit delete reply
Congrats on scaring my wife XD
She took one look at the gif and said "You ponies are scary on the internet."
Disloyal Subject 17th Dec 2014, 5:33 PM How did Raxon post directly in his comment? I must know... edit delete reply
Mykin 17th Dec 2014, 8:59 PM edit delete reply
Huh, I always imagined her as a psyker or a navigator with that "Pinkie Sense" of hers. That or an Ork, really. Just imagine all the parties she could throw as warboss!
Blueblade 17th Dec 2014, 7:00 PM edit delete reply
One of us one of us...
Raxon 17th Dec 2014, 9:10 PM edit delete reply
Gooble gobble gooble gobble
Specter 17th Dec 2014, 10:47 PM edit delete reply
Xander, remember when you said "What have I started?" Well guess what...

(Although, to tell you the truth, this was completely expected)
Kynrasian 16th Dec 2014, 10:07 AM edit delete reply
I don't know if I mentioned this before, I remember one time that I DM'd a short game and the party had the drop on some kobolds at the entrance to a mine. They'd managed to get a look at the kobolds without being seen and one of them decided that instead of just attacking to gain a surprise round, the best course of action would be to throw the dwarf cleric over the fence they were hiding behind.

They did squash a kobold, but I was getting close to having one take a look around the corner if the party didn't hurry up.
daftdeafdave 16th Dec 2014, 10:21 AM edit delete reply
Does LARP count for Story Time?

I once used mind reading and an elaborate set up with my minions posing as players to cheat at a poker tournament.

I ended up facing down another player who was using a ground-hog day style time loop to test optimal plays.
you know that guy 16th Dec 2014, 5:25 PM edit delete reply
Who won?
daftdeafdave 17th Dec 2014, 3:44 AM edit delete reply
Me but the other guy ended up owning my minions.
Blueblade 18th Dec 2014, 3:36 AM edit delete reply
And the moral of the story is that gambling is bad and that you shouldn't cheat
you know that guy 18th Dec 2014, 7:18 AM edit delete reply
Or, that gambling is bad and even the two cheaty winners lost something.
Keirgo 16th Dec 2014, 10:33 AM Keirgo edit delete reply
Okay. This is from a Star Wars campaign where we were kind of playing sith aligned characters but...

Okay, the goal we had to meet was to simply land on this forest planet to check out a hidden temple for some relics. As we arrived our ship was contacted by local security, telling us to stop at the nearby floating city and register our arrival.

We were basically nicely asked by what amounted to security guards to stop by and fill out a form (that we were more than capable of lying on) to say we were here.

Our brave leader proceeded to open the cargo bay and dump flaming barrels of fuel down onto the forest bellow. The forest that these people considered so sacred they made all their towns and cities fly.

What followed was an aerial battle with the local army, more napalming of their sacred forest, our arrest, an explosive escape from prison, the hijacking of the cities control scheme, a massive terrorist threat to plunge the whole city at terminal speeds into the forest below, killing everyone and leveling miles of woodland...faced with this annihilation the government had no choice but to cede to our demands.

To let us leave, go 3 miles away, visit a shrine, then leave the planet. The very thing we would have gotten to do if we'd just paid a 'hello' visit to customs.
remia1 16th Dec 2014, 1:28 PM edit delete reply
ok, so the game was Wraith the Oblivion. the campaign only lasted 2 sessions for a couple of reasons, the first of which is the focus of the story. the second was that we were playing in the GM's hospital room, as he was a hemophiliac, and had been having complications, and after 3 Code Blues (from outside the room, not the GM) in 2 hours we decided that along with reason 1, it was a hint that we shouldn't play the game.
Wraith, if you weren't aware is a game where you are a ghost. you also play someone else's Shadow. the shadow is a bundle of all the negative feelings and emotions a person has with a voice all its own. Wraith, of all the old World of Darkness games is the trickiest game to play, because you need to know the other people in the group well enough to push the right buttons, but trust them enough not to push those buttons too hard.
at any rate, I had just gotten a week or 2 prior, the Shadow Player's Guide, which was a book devoted entirely to suggestions on how to best play the dark aspect. One of the suggestions was for the Shadow to offer extra dice for any rolls the PC needed to make. (which costs the Shadow energy) the idea being that the PC gets used to this, and even dependent on it, and then when the time is right you don't offer those dice, and the PC suffers for it (giving the Shadow back the energy and then some).
I, after talking it over with the GM, decided to take this one step farther. PCs hope to Transcend, and move on from their ghostly existence, Shadows try to drive the PC to Oblivion, the black nothingness of the Underworld. Either way the PC is never heard from again. I, as Shadow, said "what if they are both the same thing? no one has ever come back from either to say they are different. why should I fight him when I can help him? both result in nothingness."
So I helped him, I gave advice, offered extra dice for every roll, warned him of attacks, etc.
the player freaked out. his character knew, from talking to others that there was a light half and a dark half of the soul, that the dark half was always pushing towards evil, and his wasn't. He questioned his place in the afterlife, and if HE truly WAS the light half of the soul.
Which drove the character into a crisis of self doubt, that if he had failed, would have become a Specter (a soul with the dark half in charge), and would have tried to destroy the party.
This was something the GM was not yet ready for so early in the game. So with that and the code blues, we called an end to the game.
Freelance 16th Dec 2014, 2:06 PM edit delete reply
You want elaborate/convoluted? I got one for you.

Our group was tasked to clear the land of some ogres that were harassing some kobolds. (Before you ask, they owned some gold mines that the ogres were trying to steal from them.) Along the way, we find out that some stirge nests has set up in the surrounding forest.

My character, this time a maedar (male medusa) monk, made the off-hand comment, "Too bad we can't sick one against the other. ..... Wait a minute...." What we did was take all our rope and construct nets out of them. My monk, with the matching speed of the stirges, were to lead the overgrown mosquitos to the nets as bait.

Once they were all caught, we tracked the ogres to a cave. Or should I say, their discotheque. The one thing you'll never scrub from your mind: ogres in angel flight suits. So once they were all in, we opened the nets at the foot of the cave, letting all of the stirges in and the wizard using an earthshape spell to close off the opening. In the end, the ogres were turned into essentially dried-out husks, and the what was left of the stirges popped like balloons from the gorging.
Stranger 16th Dec 2014, 3:04 PM edit delete reply
Well . . . only once which counted. The players of my most recent campaign opt for more straightforward "classic" options than trying to break things by being convoluted.

Except the rogue.

See, he wanted to be Evil. I told him no, so he came up with the idea of claiming split personality which was evil while the other was ruthless but still a "good guy". I added the stipulation I had the right to play the evil side and not tell him what went on until he found out about it.

Which prompted him to do things like lock himself in a room with no other exit when they got their own stronghold later. He started off for the first half of the campaign so paranoid I was going to screw with him . . . and I opted to let nothing develop.

Well, except for notes which his other side was leaving him, just messing with his head for the most part. This led to the rogue continuing to be serious, such as tying himself to trees before sleeping in the wild . . .

After a couple months of sessions, I finally pointed out something. "What's your skill at to escape bonds?"

And so he wound up taking me aside after the session and said "y'know, maybe we could drop that whole 'evil split personality' thing..."

. . . and I hadn't really done anything at all with it yet.
Euric 18th Dec 2014, 12:29 AM edit delete reply
Ah, the power of an indirect suggestion, the easiest way to get you players paranoid. Pair that with the slightest reason for them to expect a trap and you can have the bravest players suddenly become terrified of their own shadow.
Stranger 21st Dec 2014, 1:04 AM edit delete reply
"Roll perception . . . 23? Okay. You don't find any traps."

Yeah, it's all in how you phrase it. Also tends to give away when there's still hidden traps when you aren't careful about it.

But the story does go somewhere . . . I did drop the evil personality thing. Because it wasn't an evil split personality which was the problem, it was another 'version' of himself trying to solve "mistakes" which had happened to him in his own life. Including basically warning the current adventure is walking directly into an ill-advised ambush on a demon lord.

The basic gist is simple - he exists because the team rogue decided to do something *colossally stupid* and try stealing from the God of Thieves once he hit a high enough level to have mundane theft be almost like sleepwalking. And he managed to do it.

. . . in that reality, he was only the second to pull it off, and the first had his name erased for the stunt. The team rogue was removed from existence and told he could only exist again if he could keep himself from succeeding.

Of course, despite being remarkably loose on morals and quick to the "Dagger in the back" kind of problem solving, assassinating yourself is something he found hard to grasp doing. So instead he's manipulating events to keep the rogue too busy with other stuff to plan the raid on the god's little treasure room.
Mykin 16th Dec 2014, 4:39 PM edit delete reply
Using underhanded or elaborate tactics to accomplish a relatively mundane thing in a roleplaying game? Alright, where to begin...

Well, back in the good(?) old days, there was the time our kender rogue had the task of hiding the princess as we tried to fight off a literal army of drow in the inn we were staying in. He took her to the cellar with a ton of wine barrels around (with the dm pointing out that a few of them were empty) and then did the obvious...for him at least. He ripped up the brick from the flooring and proceeded to dig at least 4 feet into the rocky dirt and only then did he decided that was a silly idea and went with hiding in a wine barrel. Not the princess, mind you, but himself. Probably would of worked if the coward didn't get stuck half way into the barrel by the time the drow overwhelmed us and barged into the cellar.

Then there was the time the same group was paid to find out what was going on in a meeting between the general and the captain of the town guard in an inn at the heart of the city. We were split on what we wanted to do so the cleric and ranger decided to go to the roof and propel down to the window of the room where the meeting was taking place while the wizard decided to use a floating disc to get the kender up to the support beams and sneak into the room that way (the second floor of the inn was under construction so you could get in from room to room that way. Don't ask me why the general and the captain decided to have their meeting here, it makes just about as much sense now as it did then). The samurai and my fighter decided to, well, stand next to the door and listen in. They weren't really trying to be quiet at all really and as long as nothing went wrong, we would be able to figure things out and be on our way. But of course things went wrong: The cleric accidentally broke through the window, the kender slipped and fell on the table, and our samurai got annoyed when he failed his listen check and decided to hack down the door. All got promptly thrown out and threatened with jail time before the meeting resumed. So we went straight to plan B: Use my fighter as a battering ram to break down the door and force them to tell us what their plans were. It went about as well as you can imagine. On the plus side, I got a jail cell all to myself so I was happy.

EDIT: Ok I have one more. We had just scored big from our last dungeon run (though I had triggered a trap and mysteriously found myself mainly crippled instead of dead like usual) and our cleric found himself short a thousand gold towards buy some new magical armor. So he did what was obvious: He used a scroll that allowed him to change one action of his in the past and he used it to stop himself from saving my life, thus ensuring I died instead of becoming crippled and the shares became larger as a result. He got his armor and I got to pull out Fighter #342 from the xerox machine (because, like Specter, I too played the ever important role of Human Canary in that group).

So, between hiding a princess, simply standing outside and listening, and earning more money, that group opted to over complicate manners and it usually didn't work. I do have more stories from then but I will stop now so I have something to share in the future.
Vellikat 16th Dec 2014, 5:31 PM edit delete reply
I reckon Rainbow's player has something to do with this sneaky character. Passing notes to the DM to secretly play them, I think... Calling it now.
Disloyal Subject 16th Dec 2014, 9:21 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
If she is doing that, then good on her for branching out. The other girls will never see it coming from the 'brutish' barbarian's player, either, which makes it even better. You might be on to something here... Though I can't see what would force her to admit it, bar the GM deciding to be a jerk and out her. Maybe revealing it herself so she could see the look on everyone's faces?
Mykin 16th Dec 2014, 10:31 PM edit delete reply
Huh, that actually makes a lot of sense now that I'm thinking of it. And I do agree, the only way she would reveal herself is to just see the look on everyone's faces...barring the GM accidentally slipping up and revealing her early, of course.
Specter 16th Dec 2014, 7:45 PM edit delete reply
The most mundane thing our group ever tried to do in the most elaborate way, was probably trying to pickpocket somepony. (No, seriously, we did this, and for the fact we actually did it was past even me)

In the ancient Crystal Empire, a tournament was held for the entertainment of King Sombra (and if you couldn't tell, this was pretty much a mass evil campaign), and our group was "enlisted" from our humble slave quarters to fight as a team against some of his royal majesties' best (why an evil campaign is because we were technically corrupted from our long enslavement). Let it be said, we actually pulled a S.W.A.T. on them (it pretty much is team dynamic synergy that matches that of the enemy), and they fell only due to attrition above everything else. We fought well enough that we were granted a spot within the military in the positions we just opened up.

Now, with freedom (despite militaristic duties), we were pretty much allowed to do whatever we felt like. *Cue half the party going off to do evil and horrible things to a number of prisoners*. The other half of us who had some ideal we followed (all of us being LE if you could believe that) decided to get back at Sombra in some way.

What we ended up doing was: Send our rogue on a "scouting" mission on the bridges of our territory to watch for any Equestrian military attacks (real mission, send a message to Princess Celestia and Luna for aid). The barbarian tests his might against as many slaves as he can in a NON-LEATHAL combat tournament (real mission, create a massive distraction for the Equestrian forces to arrive and fight with a massive advantage). I (the fighter) and our cleric moving about the castle inspecting any and all rooms, equipment, and personal for any possible sign of damage, tampering, or laziness (real mission, you get it, we were doing the exact opposite).

On the day of the assault, our less inclined allies had finally decided to participate in our plan, and they screwed up pretty much all of it. Their shenanigans with the slaves caused a massive revolt that caused (pretty much) a 3rd team of combatants to take the field against any and all military looking personnel. This caused us (the players only) to move our way to the castle and pray something in our favor happened. Eventually, Equestria, defeating Sombra's forces and convincing the prisoners that they were on their side, marched into the keep, to find King Sombra and 8 lackeys, and upon further investigation, the Equestrian forces recognized four of us as the defectors of Sombra (thankfully the rogue was right on providing pictures with the message of aid).

What resulted in happening, was that the four players who actually liked Sombra for letting them do whatever the hell they wanted, fought the four of us defectors for betraying his majesty (This essentially became the ending of Resident Evil: Operation Raccoon City). We won thankfully (I died), and the battle against Sombra began. In the middle of the battle, our rogue, who was flanking Sombra for the perfect backstab, picked his pocket, and made a critical success. Sombra was (with the greatly needed aid of the princess' themselves) eventually defeated.

Our surviving team took up residence in Equestria and eventually found somepony who could revive me (I became pretty docile and obedient as a side-effect though), and were questioned why we defected from Sombra. Our answer, "We just wanted to pick his pocket." ... The GM finally got his answer, we finally told them, and they weren't amused.

It was worth it.

Might as well say it. It is worth the journey, despite the end result.
you know that guy 17th Dec 2014, 9:14 AM edit delete reply
What was in it?
Mykin 17th Dec 2014, 10:27 AM edit delete reply
A crystal heart probably. That or an IOU, just to be equally ridiculous.
Specter 17th Dec 2014, 12:04 PM edit delete reply
Loot content:
-1 Whip (no combat potential)
-3 bits
-1 Picture of some crystal pony mare (never followed up on it)
-and an activated trap that pretty much sent some of Sombra's evil energy into the rogue, slightly possessing him (but that was added AFTER we told them why we did it).

Despite now having a multi-personality disorder, the rogue still thinks it was worth it.
Chrysalis 16th Dec 2014, 7:59 PM edit delete reply
Simply put, I used strong arm tactics to get young ponies to join the EUP as Chrysalis to garner a recruitment bonus. Equestria was on a war footing and needed more soldiers, so to cash in on their offer to pay anyone to help bring forth willing volunteers, I kidnapped their family members and told them that if they ever wanted to see them alive again, they'd serve their country. It was quick, quiet, easy, and highly profitable.
Digo 17th Dec 2014, 5:46 AM edit delete reply

Equestrian... ?
Kinrah 17th Dec 2014, 7:04 AM edit delete reply
The EUP guard is Celestia's royal guard as mentioned in Testing Testing 1,2,3, with EUP standing for Earth, Unicorn, Pegasus.
you know that guy 17th Dec 2014, 9:15 AM edit delete reply
The Angry Vegan 16th Dec 2014, 9:23 PM edit delete reply
I once nearly managed to talk the party into using a ballista, a floating disk, a length of rope, and a pair of handcuffs as a method of rapid transportation. We actually would have tried it, too, if we hadn't run out of time.

Speaking of the ballista... the ballista itself. We spent a lot of time working out how to reload it in one turn, just so that we could use it on medium-sized individuals. Freakin' worth it when we managed to crit, though.
Steeeve 17th Dec 2014, 8:08 PM GNOME IN DA HOLE! edit delete reply
The Angry Vegan 18th Dec 2014, 5:19 AM edit delete reply
I regret nothing. Well, nothing except not being able to carry out Operation AHHHHH Oh Gods Why Did I Agree To Do This?!
Akouma 17th Dec 2014, 2:14 PM edit delete reply
So, my character in a nautical Pathfinder game was an Alchemist. Since he was the operator of our ships experimental alchemical engine that barely ever malfunctioned, he frequently had downtime. His buddy, the navigator (another PC), convinced him that they could totally make a still and sell booze to the crew who weren't allowed to have any since this was a military expedition. It WAS working, but all the fun got sucked out of it when our DM mentioned that it's only ON-DUTY staff who couldn't have alcohol. There was actually tons of booze on the ship.

Naturally, we continued making and selling it anyway. Free money is free money.
Blueblade 17th Dec 2014, 7:01 PM edit delete reply
For anybody who may or may not have missed me no worries I'm still alive!
Mykin 17th Dec 2014, 9:21 PM edit delete reply
Welcome back! Glad your still alive! Would be sad if you weren't...and slightly weird because then you would be a ghost or something, stuck haunting the site for who knows how long...But just in case, I better make sure I still have all my ghost hunting equipment ready.
Blueblade 18th Dec 2014, 3:34 AM edit delete reply
Who ya gonna call? Ghostbusters! (And if you can't find them turns out Mykin is also an available ghost hunter)
ShadowDragon8685 18th Dec 2014, 12:12 AM edit delete reply
So, while back I was running a Shadowrun game, set in Seattle, the usual.

I had a Johnson approach my players with a simple proposition. There was a certain sleazeball up in Everett who had been seducing girls with low self-esteem, sleeping with them, then emotionally destroying them by revealing that he'd only wanted to fuck them and they'd meant nothing to him.

The Johnson was the father of one of these girls. He didn't want the guy killed. He didn't even want him tuned up, framed for a major felony, or black-bagged and mailed to Shanghai or something.

He wanted them to *ruin the guy's life.* Without laying so much as a finger on him, without getting him killed or arrested, the old man wanted the sleazebag's life turned to drek.

Now, the old man (and I) were expecting they'd do something like write some complicated Matrix scripts to sign the guy up for basically every periodical known to mankind, hacking his social media accounts to give glowing reviews of troll joybois, etc. For this ongoing harassment, the old man was going to pay them the sum of 250 nuyen a week - not exactly a princely sum, but for a zero-risk, nearly-zero-effort gig, a low but steady income's not a bad deal.

And they did that.

They also summoned spirits and animated each and every piece of furniture in his apartment to march themselves up against the door and barricade it. They hacked the stuffer shack where he worked and edited his employee profile with so many bad marks that he got fired. They wrote a matrix script to watch his moves and any time he got close to anyone female, send them the links to his blogs wherein he helpfully provided holos of him emotionally ripping into girls and telling them what bad lays they were. They went OVERBOARD, and in a week he was fired from his job and being harassed nonstop.

Then later, they got another one of those steady-income dealies. Some veteran Shadowrunners were setting aside a nest to roost in when and if retirement happened, but they needed to depart. Unfortunately the place was in a nice neighborhood with an active and annoying homeowner's association who had a habit of passing rules (and imposing fines) just to spite people who didn't attend, etc.

So basically, they'd get a ready-made place to squat, in a nice neighborhood, and a steady income, the catch was that someone had to be living there full-time, take care of the place, and not let the locals get the idea Shadowrunners lived there. Then I went and made the whole neighborhood into some wanker's idea of a slice of the UK installed in the better part of Redmond Barrens behind heavy walls. The house itself was literally 221b Baker Street, very much heavily inspired by the digs in the Robert Downy Jr. films wherein he plays Sherlock Holmes.