Page 682 - Heavy Artillery

5th Dec 2015, 5:00 AM in The Last Roundup
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Heavy Artillery
Average Rating: 5 (2 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 5th Dec 2015, 5:00 AM edit delete
Since I got into ponies right after Season One ended, the first time I got to see the fandom react in real time was in Season Two. So I remember The Last Roundup making waves on several fronts. There was the big one (Derpy and the controversial change that followed), but there was also "guns," which was not helped by "Tank" seven episodes earlier.

No podcasts this week. <sigh>

Notice: Guest comic submissions are open! Guidelines here. Deadline: January 27th, 2023.



ANW 5th Dec 2015, 5:09 AM edit delete reply
I came up with an interesting rule, but would like some help ironing out the details.
Do good things, and the memories of it would help.
Do bad, well you get the geist of it.
I'm thinking flashback for some way.
Platonix 5th Dec 2015, 10:43 AM edit delete reply
Define "memories". Do you want this to something more mystical than just "NPCs are more inclined to help you if you're known throughout the land for being a do-gooder"?
Tatsurou 5th Dec 2015, 12:12 PM edit delete reply
I think he means gaining motivation from your memories of doing good, and being weighed down when you "feel your sins crawling on your back".
ANW 5th Dec 2015, 2:58 PM edit delete reply
That's the one
Fourecks 5th Dec 2015, 10:54 AM edit delete reply
I have a feeling at least one of the WoD systems has something like this...
Jennifer 5th Dec 2015, 5:27 AM edit delete reply
There are cannons, and "gun" is commonly a synonym for cannon. Especially if you're talking about "big guns." Artillerists are called "gunners" for a reason.

"Tank" I am curious about, though. There are helicopters in the setting as well, so there might be tracked vehicles.
Digo Dragon 5th Dec 2015, 5:33 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Yeah, I wonder what pony tanks look like. Cannons seem fairly appropriate to their tech level.
Faustenberger 5th Dec 2015, 6:14 AM edit delete reply
Well, you could argue that Cheese Sandwich has a party tank, albeit one that you ride atop rather than inside.

Or you could go to the reason tanks were called tanks. They were originally going to be called land-ships, but in order to confuse intelligence they referred to them as Tanks to imply that they were just big liquid transports.
Greenhornet 5th Dec 2015, 4:00 PM edit delete reply
In Turtletaube's alternate reality fiction, military tanks are called "barrels".
Greenhornet 5th Dec 2015, 4:02 PM edit delete reply
Just as I posted I realized that the ponies could very well call tanks "war wagons". Or possibly "battle wagons", but that's the nickname for battleships.
Disloyal Subject 6th Dec 2015, 4:23 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
Further evidence that ponies are Orks.
Digo Dragon 7th Dec 2015, 4:52 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
That is a hilarious comparison.
Desparil 8th Dec 2015, 2:38 PM edit delete reply
Well, depending how you read it, they could be in German...

Wagen is a real general-purpose word, it can mean car, cart, wagon, chariot, carriage; vehicles in general. If you choose to read it as wagon rather than vehicle, though, then Panzerkampfwagen is "armored war wagon."
albedoequals1 5th Dec 2015, 9:36 AM edit delete reply
The pony tech level is much more advanced than rural Ponyville would lead you to believe. There are numerous occurrences of technology that was developed after 1950. We don't see firearms (except the party cannon) or automobiles, but that's probably just because there is no need for them rather than because they are too advanced. Why spend a huge wad of cash on a car when you can run 40 miles-per-hour? Why shoot someone when you can zap them with magic or force them to become your friend in 20 minutes? :P
j-eagle12212012 5th Dec 2015, 6:34 AM edit delete reply
Leonardo Da Vinci sketched the designs for what we would call a tank in a time period that was less advanced than what equestria has so tanks could exisit in Equestria
aerion111 5th Dec 2015, 6:33 PM edit delete reply
There were various degrees of 'proto-tanks' even back in early greek times.
At its most basic, a tank's purpose is armor, and there's been armored vehicles longer than there's been autonomous ones.
Heck, even if you required it to also do artillery, they still had some versions of that.
FanOfMostEverything 5th Dec 2015, 7:38 AM edit delete reply
What's especially interesting there is that "tank" was a code name for Britain's armored landships that became better known than the intended term. This implies that Equestria not only has armored divisions, but they've kept them secret from some other world power.

Etymology is fun!
terrycloth 5th Dec 2015, 11:01 AM edit delete reply
They have party cannon, and party artillery, and I guess party tanks?

But when they were actually going to war against Sombra, they didn't use any of them.

Military doctrine states that complicated machinery is too easy to subvert with Come to Life spells?
Greenhornet 5th Dec 2015, 4:04 PM edit delete reply
What about the Twilight Sparkle "Gatling gun"?
Digo Dragon 7th Dec 2015, 4:55 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Gatling guns are really old too. Early to Mid 19th century at least.
Guest 7th Dec 2015, 10:57 AM edit delete reply
Actually, War Wagons were actually used in the middle ages - and were extremely effective:

That being said, I've actually tried incorporating war wagons in Pathfinder games on two occasions now. The first was a campaign where my human alchemist had a cart that he intended to upgrade once he got the chance (but then the campaign came to an end, alas). I'm in an active campaign now as a gnome alchemist - so I don't have to upgrade to anything larger, I just have to start plastering the sides with tower shields and then fire crossbows and hurl bombs from behind cover. ^.^
j-eagle12212012 5th Dec 2015, 6:26 AM edit delete reply
*Totally Spoiler Filled Review*
The Cutie Remark part 2

as I said on thursday the finale was too big for one review and continuing where we left off (and going off comments on the last review) let's dive right in

The Cutie Remark part 2

(cold open)
Recap of part one

(Act 1)

Right away I noticed that pinkie pie had her poofy hair and cutie mark. I was confused by this, but thanks to the insights of several other people we came to the conclusion that the Mane six would all eventually get their cutie marks it was the connection they had that was severed.

Zecora is leading the changeling resistance and has a salve that can reveal changelings. This Salve when placed on Spike and Twilight reveal to Zecora that time has been altered.

Zecora Explains Time travel paradoxes
"Time is a river where even the tinnest changes seem,
Can lead to Cascading effects Down stream."
I'm okay with this explaination.

The Great and powerful trixe is among the village ponies (in the background where you literally have to zoom in to see that it's her) The arrival of Queen Chrysalis disguised as AppleJack and Zecora sacrificng herself so Twilight can fix time is epic

(Act 2)

Oh great the Alicorn and the Unicorn fighting is going to distract the pegasus fillies from having the race...
so what villian do we have next?

Nightmare Moon reigns over equestria. Rarity is a bitch, Rainbow Dash is a member of the night guard.
You know despite all that, this version of Equestria is probably the most stable. Nightmare Moon hasn't enslaved anyone but Celestia, there is tourism to the castle, seems that they found away to produce food in eternal night... I mean out of all the scenarios this one seems to be the best case scenario

(Act 3)

Groundhog day reference (doing different things and ending with the same result)

Tierk (NOPE)

Discord (Looks fun,but Nope)

Flim and Flam ? (Dafuq????)

so at this point things are getting ridiculous and Twilight finally pulls Starlight Glimmer into the Future and shows her why the Mane six are so important

The Wasteland future with No apparent villian is the closest to a true canon Fallout Equestria and there are many theroies to how Equestria ended up like that. One of the comments on Part one brought up the possability that Twilight failing her enterance exam would result in Twilight become the 0th villian or the villian that could have been...I like that idea but more as her failing ment that when she did get her cutiemark and the surge if Magic there was no Celestia to calm her down and her magic destroyed equestria... or This Could have happened

At this point my notes became a plea

(Twilight begins talking with Starlight)

"No Redeemption for Starlight please"

(Starlight starts going on about why she is doing this)

"No Redeemption please!"

(Starlight's childhood shown)

"Starburst was Starlight's friend who went away when he got his cutiemark... okay not quite Redeemption"

(Starlight conceeds and the timeline is fixed)

"No! Redeemption! PLEASE!!!!"

Starlight Friendship is magic. Villian Redeemed. What the hell Hasbro!?!

What's her punishment?
Twilight teaches her and she get's 7 new friends, a montage, and a BUCKING SONG!?!

Can we get one vilian that stay's a vilian?

and that was the season 5 Fianle

bad news we enter the dreaded hiatus

good news we are getting a season 6 in 2016 and an MLP full lenght movie in 2017

as always
JurriRig (Hitbox)
Jamie (IRL)

*I guess I go back to commenting on the comic every Thursday lol*
EEK 5th Dec 2015, 7:35 AM edit delete reply
Personally I'd far more like to see a tragic villain, someone forced into their actions by circumstances outside of their control, say, forced by Magic ultimatum or driven insane by something they could not have stopped. of course a tragic ending would be a must in this situation though so I doubt that will ever happen
EEK 5th Dec 2015, 7:35 AM edit delete reply
Personally I'd far more like to see a tragic villain, someone forced into their actions by circumstances outside of their control, say, forced by Magic ultimatum or driven insane by something they could not have stopped. of course a tragic ending would be a must in this situation though so I doubt that will ever happen
EEK 5th Dec 2015, 7:35 AM edit delete reply
Personally I'd far more like to see a tragic villain, someone forced into their actions by circumstances outside of their control, say, forced by Magic ultimatum or driven insane by something they could not have stopped. of course a tragic ending would be a must in this situation though so I doubt that will ever happen
EEK 5th Dec 2015, 7:35 AM edit delete reply
Personally I'd far more like to see a tragic villain, someone forced into their actions by circumstances outside of their control, say, forced by Magic ultimatum or driven insane by something they could not have stopped. of course a tragic ending would be a must in this situation though so I doubt that will ever happen
EEK 5th Dec 2015, 7:35 AM edit delete reply
Personally I'd far more like to see a tragic villain, someone forced into their actions by circumstances outside of their control, say, forced by Magic ultimatum or driven insane by something they could not have stopped. of course a tragic ending would be a must in this situation though so I doubt that will ever happen
EEK 5th Dec 2015, 8:19 AM edit delete reply
(Deadpan) I'm now starting to see why having an account would be a good idea
Borg 5th Dec 2015, 9:55 AM edit delete reply
Wow. I don't think I've ever seen an accidental quintuple post before. I'm kind of impressed.
shidan 6th Dec 2015, 12:42 AM Deadpan edit delete reply
"Deadpan". Now I'm imagining Raxon having a brother who always dresses in gray, and speaks in monotone. He is good at making skillet stew-and can crush rocks in his bare hands.
Borg 5th Dec 2015, 10:04 AM edit delete reply
Well, we've still got Flim and Flam as antagonists, as well as most of the big Equestria-threatening villains.

And there's a lot that could be done with Starlight as Twilight's new friendship student. Did I want her to be reformed? Of course not. She's the only antagonist who has worked for the good of Equestria. She's the only pony who has been allowed to do bad things for good reasons without being a protagonist. She made conflicts with her very interesting. And I would have loved it if she had been forced to accept that her revenge carried a disastrous price but had ultimately escaped without being disabused of her misguided views on cutie marks. But I can be okay with the alternative. There's still plenty that can be done with her.
The Old One 5th Dec 2015, 11:18 AM edit delete reply
I was denied my Lex Luthor pony. I am sad.

I was really looking forward to having Starlight be a recurring villain. She had everything: Motivation, chops, skills, power. Twi had her Hall of Justice and her Superfriends and Star could have put together a Legion of Doom.

But Noooooooooooooooooooo.........

Time travel. It had to be time travel and the butterfly effect. It had to be redemption, cuz we're a nice show about nice ponies who all just want to be nice in the end. I hate time travel......

And now she's Equestria's Sunset Shimmer. Cuz we needed another Sunset.

Lots of great headcannon material. Lots of great alternative universe material. Hollow ending, like a twinkie with no filling
Digo Dragon 7th Dec 2015, 4:57 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
At this point if Glimmer was put on a bus and never heard from for the remainder of the show's run, I'll be fine with it.
Ishidan 5th Dec 2015, 1:48 PM Villain redemption edit delete reply
By my count, the villain score, in no particular order:
Sombra: Still a villain, but unalived.
Nightmare Moon: Redeemed into Luna, redeemed a second time when she disincorporated the Tantabus.
Discord: Redeemed, expect him to go into the dairy business.
Chrysalis: Still a villain. And still out there. (canon ends with her going for a ride on the front of a Love Blast Wave but surviving, if I'm not mistaken)
Trixie: Partially redeemed, but not taken as closely to the mane cast as Luna, Discord, Sunset, or Starlight.
Tirek: still a villain, and imprisoned.
Flim Flam Brothers: Still villains, still free to come up with another medicine show and another shillboy-or to found FlimFlam Heavy Industries.
Sunset Shimmer: Redeemed
Starlight Glimmer: Redeemed
Winged Cat 5th Dec 2015, 4:16 PM edit delete reply
Yeah. Weep not for the redemption of villains, for there's a nigh limitless supply the Mane 6 have yet to encounter.
Nixitur 5th Dec 2015, 10:03 PM edit delete reply
@Winged Cat - Don't you mean a NEIGH limitless supply?

I'll be here all week.
Remember to tip your waitresses - they fall right over.
GrayGriffin 5th Dec 2015, 6:57 PM edit delete reply
I really wish the ending would have involved Twilight winning the trust/friendship of an alternate-future version of her friends. I feel like that would be a lot more effective way of dispelling Sunlight's claim that there's no way such different ponies could be friends.
Seanpony Renaud 6th Dec 2015, 10:31 AM A Villain Redeemed? edit delete reply
What is this Anime?! I'm seeing a score card over head so lets cover some.
Dragonball Z
Yamcha: Bandit, redeemed
Tien/Chousou: Assassins, redeemed
Picollo: Literal evil half God/Devil, redeemed.
Vegeta: Prince of an evil race, redeemed. TWICE.
Frieza: Unalived.
Androids 17&18 redeemed
Cell: Unalived
Majin Buu: Split into good and evil. Good redeemed.
Evil Buu: Becomes Kid Buu. . .then redeemed as Uub.

Naruto: Every villain save Oorichimaru, Madara and the Goddess of Ki eventually come around.

So yeah tots guys. Forgiveness is ONLY taught by magical pink ponies.
Malroth 7th Dec 2015, 12:43 AM edit delete reply
Naruto eventually manages Orachimaru too in the after he becomes hokage side story.
Mykin 6th Dec 2015, 8:23 PM edit delete reply
Eh, Personally I liked the episode. Probably because I'm a big sucker for the whole "redeeming the villian" plot. Really, the only complaint I have with the episode is that this wasn't part of the ending.

Ah well, can't have everything I guess.
Digo Dragon 7th Dec 2015, 4:59 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
That might have improved the ending to include him.
GrayGriffin 7th Dec 2015, 10:46 AM edit delete reply
Nope. The whole point is that you don't need to cling to the past. And as someone pointed out, Starlight was kind of a terrible friend. She wasn't happy for Sunburst at all when he got his cutie mark, not even in the moment before he was dragged away by his parents. Also I dislike that ship as well. (Don't say anything, that comic is totally implying shipping.)
Mykin 8th Dec 2015, 7:57 AM edit delete reply
Not sure why you're being aggressive against my pick of a comic, but whatever. The shipping thing wasn't why I brought it up.

I personally just wanted some closure between the two of them. As it has been said, she was a bad friend and it would have been a nice way to show that he had learned to be a better friend by trying to repair that bridge that she herself burned to the ground. I mean, she went back to the equal village and fixed her relationship with the ponies there and that apparently didn't destroy the point of the episode. Why couldn't she do it with Sunburst as well?

But I guess it's a mute point now. I still like the episode all the same.
GrayGriffin 8th Dec 2015, 3:10 PM edit delete reply
Okay, I might have messed up in expressing my intentions a bit. I wouldn't mind seeing a meeting between Starlight and Sunburst again, but I don't want to see it as part of an ending montage. The Equality Ponies work better for that because she has a fairly recent history with them and possibly a longer one as well, depending on your headcanon. While she and Sunburst have probably never even talked since they were foals and thus have drifted apart so much that things between them couldn't just be fixed with a few words. I'd want Starlight and Sunburst meeting to be its own episode, similar to the one with Twilight and her Canterlot friends.
Mykin 27th Dec 2015, 8:35 PM edit delete reply
Fair enough. I'd actually like the idea of them having a one off episode like that, so I hope that happens.
Specter 5th Dec 2015, 9:08 AM edit delete reply
... I laughed so hard at Pinkie's comment that I woke up one of my room mates. I'm completely fine with the confused look I got.

Beyond the amazing humor, the first panel looks exactly like a certain multiplayer game I want, and the resemblance is striking.

Finally, I had to do a double take to realize that the "We would never say anything behind your back" bit was from Pinkie, not Rainbow.
steevee 5th Dec 2015, 9:52 AM edit delete reply
we had Tanks mentioned in season 1.

Art of the dress lyrics when she's making Dash's first dress.
"Rainbow wont look like a tank."

down with the turtle.
Evilbob 5th Dec 2015, 10:35 AM edit delete reply
Well. Looking like a giant water container is generally inadvisable.

There's a certain irony that that's what RD decided to name her pet though.
Raxon 5th Dec 2015, 11:26 AM edit delete reply
I got into the show in early season 2. It was early, and people didn't immediately jump to the conclusion of neckbeards and fedoras for bronies. They just jumped to the assumption that we either pervs or gay.

Not that I'm specifically denying the latter. Except the latter latter, because I'm straight as a patriot missile! Tits and baseball and lifting weights, and just a little bit of riding Neil Patrick Harris into the sunset as Hulk sensually crushes beer cans between his balls, and shoves his hand up- No! Bad brain! Straighten, arrow!
aerion111 5th Dec 2015, 6:54 PM edit delete reply
Eh, I think NPH can be considered an 'exception' to otherwise-straight males, alongside Johnny Depp.
Raxon 5th Dec 2015, 9:21 PM edit delete reply
I'm more proud of the mental image of The Incredible Hulk crushing beer cans with his testicles.
aerion111 7th Dec 2015, 8:34 AM edit delete reply
I, meanwhile, was quite intentionally acting like I'd never read it.
XScarredHeart 5th Dec 2015, 11:45 AM edit delete reply
Mykin 6th Dec 2015, 8:28 PM edit delete reply
Ok girls, this is literally past the point where you guys have any good reasons left to keep interrogating the DM like this. This is starting to feel wwwwwaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy too close to a game I was in where the rest of the party kept pestering the GM to this extent and he ended the game in a fit of frustration. It took us a solid month before he would even talk about the game again and everyone had to swear never to do that again. Ever.

Accept the fact that AJ just wants a change of pace and go back to what the DM had originally planned before you hit the point of no return.
Disloyal Subject 7th Dec 2015, 12:31 AM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
It's a little late for that, I think. The GM specifically asked if they wanted to pursue this instead of the prepared session, so flopping back probably wouldn't be much better, and I suspect the GM will pull something out of their sleeve.
Mykin 7th Dec 2015, 7:47 AM edit delete reply
But I... *Sigh* yeah I know. At this point it's like watching a multi-car crash in progress; You just keep hoping that the next car to ram into the group will be the last, despite the fact that it's in the middle of the highway and everyone hasn't quite noticed the accident right in front of them yet. I guess we'll see what the DM has in store for them.
Xander 8th Dec 2015, 1:15 AM edit delete reply
I hurt my nose facepalming