Page 773 - Off the Beaten Map

5th Jul 2016, 6:00 AM in Hurricane Fluttershy
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Off the Beaten Map
Average Rating: 5 (1 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 5th Jul 2016, 6:00 AM edit delete
Someone in the comments is going to school me about agriculture and insects, I just know it.

As DMs, we like to use technical details to give our worlds a higher fidelity, but without technical degrees in every field, we're still gamers and laymen at the end of the day. I personally believe that we reserve the right to be technically wrong sometimes on the basis of "It's fantasy," "It's a game," and "If one of my players corrects me on the spot and the facts are more interesting than my made-up version, they won't complain if I change it on the spot to make the world more interesting. Win-win."

Notice: Guest comic submissions are open! Guidelines here. Deadline: January 27th, 2023.



ANW 5th Jul 2016, 6:13 AM edit delete reply
We was all beginners once.
So it's time to reflect on those days.
Name something you did back then, that you now know better.
Classic mistakes, misunderings, not so classic mistakes.
Things like those.
Digo Dragon 5th Jul 2016, 6:40 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Jumping on meme bandwagons with only a copy/paste idea. Nowadays I try to put some personal spin on them, or just poke fun at the meme. Perhaps not much on artistic ones since I'm already doing the art in my own style, but like...

Oh, here's an example: Okay years back on an art site someone started up this meme by drawing their OC in silhouette akin to the Apple "iPod" adverts of the time. So other artists started doing that too with their OCs and it was a bandwagon thing on the site.

What I did was draw one of my characters in her living room building a death ray instead. When questioned, she said she thought about buying an iPod, but instead bought a $10 Walkman and spent the rest of the money on her hobby. But it's okay, she had Subway for lunch. :D
Pablo360 5th Jul 2016, 7:19 AM edit delete reply
I used to take what other people thought of me into consideration.
Lightning Flicker 5th Jul 2016, 8:43 AM edit delete reply
My first time DMing was a little side adventure kind of thing so the regular DM could have a break. After that, I started up a campaign about the science lab they were in. Well, they were constantly joking about the place being Aperture. I had not yet played Portal at the time so I figured 'what could go wrong?' Well... Turns out, they thought they could beat my big boss, which was a child put inside a computer because the guy who ran the place didn't want to lose his daughter. She sort of pretended to be the smart computer, but one wrong move and she'd throw the typical child temper tantrum. Everyone was like 'Paradox!' and I refused to let that work, simply because, come on guys, you KNOW she's a CHILD. Children don't get that stuff. The computer part was mostly to sustain her life. Well, everybody was upset. And that, my dear fellow readers, is why you don't say OK to references to things you don't know anything about in your games.
TipJay 5th Jul 2016, 11:15 AM edit delete reply
I played a rogue. Well, technically I played a thief, since it was second edition. That might not seem like a mistake on it's own, so allow me to explain: All but one of the other players were wizards or fighters, i think there was two wizards, three fighters and a ranger. This meant that they didn't have a way to check for traps, which meant that there were hardly any of them (our dm designed challenges so the party were always able to solve them). Enter Discord the rogue (yes, I know), and suddenly traps were everywhere. The problem was that I, being new, didn't know that I was supposed to check for traps at all, this led to one of the funniest moments in the campaign.

We were in a square room with tapestries on the walls, in the middle of the room there was a slightly raised platform, but it was otherwise empty. I checked for hidden exits and found a button in the floor, the one time I remembered to check for traps, one of the fighters pressed the button before I had time. The floor raised and lowered to form a staircase going around the room. The dm said "you notice a boulder at the top of the staircase", and made that famous "you're screwed" face. Everyone began to run down the stairs, and I think someone may have started humming the Indiana Jones theme. Then one of the fighters declared "as the boulder is rolling down the stairs, I turn around and climb it". The dm told him that he would have a 15% chance of success, naturally he failed and was crushed. Luckily we had him resurrected, and he lived to make many more stupid decisions, and I got some more stories to tell.
Digo Dragon 5th Jul 2016, 12:28 PM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
Two wizards and neither had any way to stop the boulder, huh? Yikes. I hope that fighter learned to be more patient next time! :3
TipJay 6th Jul 2016, 8:17 AM edit delete reply
Well, they were both blaster wizards, one of them was new, so it made sense. But the other had been playing for SIX YEARS, and he still has something like ten spells that he uses almost exclusively.
Specter 5th Jul 2016, 4:30 PM edit delete reply
Not buying everything I could possibly use in multiple, practical, scenarios.
Digo Dragon 6th Jul 2016, 5:23 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
I was in a party that nearly failed a dungeon crawl because no one had rope. XD
aylatrigger 5th Jul 2016, 9:39 PM edit delete reply
Mistake: trusting my brothers not to kill my characters. 14 times. I was young and foolish (I started playing D&D when I was 8).
albedoequals1 5th Jul 2016, 10:21 PM edit delete reply
I once made a boss that couldn't fly or teleport. Ever seen a lich defeated by Create Pit? That was embarrassing.
Ponikon 6th Jul 2016, 2:18 AM edit delete reply
The biggest mistake I've ever made was not murdering party members willing to do needless PvP.
JacobDracon 6th Jul 2016, 9:35 PM I made a new word! edit delete reply
It's finally time to appear and tell the story about how I made a new word.

I was playing a Rifts Campaign (Think of Fallout, but with ley lines, dimensions, and ALOT more aliens), and I was playing a Full-Conversion Cyborg with a pretty good IQ. My team was preparing for a Vampire ambush and I decided to get a Super Soaker with a couple of gallons of water. I then went to the church and said, "I want this water holified (Holy-fied)". No one noticed this at first, until our gunslinger asked to repeat what I said. After saying it again, everyone bursts into laughter! Since then, I have used that word in every campaign I've been in.
Digo Dragon 5th Jul 2016, 6:44 AM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
I think one of the most challenging campaigns I ran was an American Civil War story where the PCs got to be high-ranking officers in control of military forces. Among my players I had a US Marine, US Naval officer, and two who were children of US Army soldiers.

Collectively that was a *LOT* of military knowledge I didn't have. And while they weren't much more intimate with mid-1800s weaponry, the tactics and strategy used in modern warfare got it's roots in the Civil War, so I got challenged to keep enemy forces realistic in their plans.

They pretty much trounced me anyway, but playing out massive-scale battles was fun anyway so I didn't mind it.
Winged Cat 5th Jul 2016, 11:24 AM edit delete reply
Eh. If you have players who can totally break your campaign, and you plan expecting them to do this, it can be a lot of fun. You can get away with setting up "unbeatable" scenarios and watching them just plow on through. (So long as it's not literally unbeatable, as in "you're dead before you can act" or the like.)

In the campaign I just started, the players are already openly conspiring to do this to the 100-session plot, 2 sessions into the game. The result is not that dissimilar to a certain Web comic (save for the GM counting on it instead of breaking down).
Digo Dragon 5th Jul 2016, 12:33 PM edit delete reply
Digo Dragon
I was aware at the time of their military knowledge. While I did my best to study up on basic tactics and strategy of the era, it's hard to complete against a party who's got years to my days of knowledge. :3

I expected to get curb-stomped, but yeah it was still enjoyable for the fact that the rules we used for massive army engagements worked out pretty well. Plus, the players were kind enough to teach me some tricks as we went along (and not metagame too badly since they were playing Union forces).
j-eagle12212012 5th Jul 2016, 1:13 PM edit delete reply
Fluttershy: " I got it, we take the breezies home and push it closer to the pollen source"
Specter 5th Jul 2016, 4:32 PM edit delete reply
... that sounds so impossible and unpracticle that it just might work.
remial 5th Jul 2016, 2:03 PM edit delete reply
I may have mentioned it before, but I was in a D&D game where we altered the ecology of the planet.
The GM had planned for a massive war between the civilized races (Humans, Elves, Dwarves, and what not) and the Greenskins (trolls, Goblins, Orcs, Ogre Magi, etc).
Our task was to transport the treaty from one civilized race to the next to get everyone to work together in peace and harmony against a common foe. And we were ok with that.
Until we got to the Halflings.
They all had orange skin, green hair, maroon shirts, white bib overalls, and sang EVERYTHING in rhyme, just like the Oompa-Loompas in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.
We decided they were too stupid to live and set out to commit genocide.
By the time the GM had had enough of our bullshit, we had reduced a once proud race from several hundred thousand to maybe 300. Breaking up breeding pairs is what made it really easy, and there would not be enough genetic diversity for the race to continue.
In the end the GM ruled that the primary staple of the halflings diet was a particular plant that was highly invasive, and toxic to most other species. This plant ended up taking over farm lands, edging out grains and pastures, resulting in starvation for pretty much every humanoid race. By the end even the Greenskins were horrified by our behavior. Demonlords applauded, and when we were finally brought to an end, greeted us with open arms and awaiting seats of honor, where we could oversee the torment of the souls of dead Halflings.

All and all, one of the better campaigns I've been in, even if we didn't get XP for the genocide, or death of the world.
Winged Cat 5th Jul 2016, 2:25 PM edit delete reply
That sort of campaign is reward enough. Impossible as it may seem, some things are worth more than XP.
Winged Cat 5th Jul 2016, 2:23 PM edit delete reply
Wouldn't the breezies be able to pollinate? They're the right size, and they already carry pollen during their migration.

As to the garden, set up a fortified greenhouse. Yes it'd cost, but if it means the breezies would have enough pollen (apparently with medicinal value) to share, that could be sold to make up the cost. Beyond that, it could serve as a frontier trading post: surely the breezies have other things in surplus that ponies would value.

Granted, you'd have to clear out some land long enough for construction to happen (and make sure the design is strong enough to resist monsters afterward). That's just the kind of sidequest RD mentions (and Twilight might be all over the latter part).
Guest 6th Jul 2016, 12:23 PM edit delete reply
Is there any reason they can't take the flower seeds into the breezie realm itself ? The breezies themselves may find the seeds to heavy to carry back, but the ponies shouldn't .
Dusk Raven 6th Jul 2016, 5:44 PM edit delete reply
Out of curiosity, anyone heading to BronyCon this weekend?